We pride ourselves on having the friendliest
and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment
for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers.
If you have any problems registering please drop an email to firstname.lastname@example.org.
Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!
I've popped in and out of this board for some time now because I can't seem to make up my mind. DH and I will have been married for 7 years next month, and we have 4 kids (ages 4, 3 and b/g twins that are 18 months). Obviously we have our hands full and have a lot of kids. I have had mixed feelings about wanting another for a while now. I am not young (turned 40 in March) and had my tubes tied after the twins since I thought I SHOULDN'T want any more, but I do. We struggle to support the kids we have now, and have a small living space, so I feel very guilty and selfish for wanting another. I know if we were to get pregnant again our family and friends would think it was a mistake. Anyone else feeling the same thing, or any thoughts or advice?
I would feel a lot of guilt if we started ttc before DS is a little older. I don't want to jip him out of my attention or make him feel less loved during his needy toddler age. I can see where it would be a hard decision for you to make.
Firstly, I like to think of it this way. What will you regret more, a tighter budget or living with that angst in your heart forever?
I feel guilty having another child because, all my kids have the same Father (my ex) and my partners two kids have the same Mother. I feel guilty, because I worry that the kids will feel left out when Loz and I have our own child. I feel guilty because together we already have 6 kids and I mean, thats alot of kids lol. Although, if I didn't think we could swing it financially, I wouldn't consider it... Like if I didn't think I could pay the bills, clothe them and feed them. We may not get to take luxurious holidays but as long as all the kids are taken care of...
I know I *need* this, I know that if we don't, I will always regret it and when he/she is grown up, I will never regret it.
I do feel guilty. My mom is very close with my two girls and I know throwing another baby into the mix will change the dynamic. Everything seems so perfect now.... not that it won't be, with a new baby, but yeah there is a guilt feeling for wanting another one.