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I'm being harassed about EBFing my son at this age


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  #1  
April 22nd, 2009, 09:55 AM
blondie-lox's Avatar Do NOT feed the Troll
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A lot of people are telling me that I should be feeding my 8month old solids. It's getting frustrating. My doctor even said that my milk isn't enough for him!! This couldn't be true? I was going to really start on the solids at 9months. I have tried twice to feed Lincoln solids and he just doesn't want it, he fights it tooth and nail. What can I tell these "advice givers" (I say this loosely) to silence them! UGH!
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  #2  
April 22nd, 2009, 10:18 AM
kristen121's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Well, if you've tried and he doesn't like it, then he's just not ready yet. What are you going to do? It's not as if he's 2 years old and not eating any solid food yet. Even "experts" who advice starting solids at 4 months still say that the majority of baby's nutrition should come from BM or formula until they are 12 months old.
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  #3  
April 22nd, 2009, 10:36 AM
beck12's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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People gave me grief too ....I ALWAYS countered by telling them that EVERY medical association out there will tell you that the baby's PRIMARY nutrition for the ENTIRE first year is supposed to be BM or formula with the intro of solids to be primarily for texture & taste introduction. Their little tummies aren't designed to be able to break down & absorb most of the nutrients in those foods anyway. Ask your Dr to produce something in writing that says that BM isn't enough for the first year. I can bet he won't be able to come up with ANYTHING. You can share this too: Fat and Energy Contents of Expressed Human Breast Milk in Prolonged Lactation -- Mandel et al. 116 (3): e432 -- Pediatrics It shows that the longer you BF the fattier your milk is....thus proving that your body adjusts your milk to accommodate your growing baby. So the milk you are giving him today is MUCH richer than it was 8 months ago....your body knows how to cater to his growing needs!

This may help you too: Lack Of Interest In Solids - La Leche League Mother-to-Mother Forums All these moms seem to had the same thing going on....I think it is totally normal!

Secondly - since they are YOUR bbs - then THEY shouldn't worry about it! If you are happy & he is happy, then not to worry.

This article is a good read even if he isn't having this exact problem....it has good ideas on some things that may cross over well. Help! My Baby Hates Solid Foods! - Baby - Families.com Michelle might like this one too!

And if all else fails...ask them (meaning ANYONE harassing you ) to provide you with info on how BM ISN'T adequate nutrition at this age....and THEN you will discuss it with them at length. They won't be able to find anything & you should be done having that talk...at least for a while.

HUGS - it stinks. I got a lecture at Jonah's 7 month appt that if I had been giving him "adequate" solids he would have more teeth??? I never saw that Dr again.
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We've begun to raise daughters more like sons... but few have the courage to raise our sons more like our daughters. ~Gloria Steinem

If a man has been his mother's undisputed darling he retains throughout life the triumphant feeling, the confidence in success, which not seldom brings actual success along with it. ~Sigmund Freud
My mom is a neverending song in my heart of comfort, happiness, and being. I may sometimes forget the words but I always remember the tune. ~Graycie Harmon
Don't wait to make your son a great man - make him a great boy. ~Author Unknown
You don't raise heroes, you raise sons. And if you treat them like sons, they'll turn out to be heroes, even if it's just in your own eyes. ~Walter M. Schirra, Sr.
A man loves his sweetheart the most, his wife the best, but his mother the longest. ~Irish Proverb
Mother's love is peace. It need not be acquired, it need not be deserved. ~Erich Fromm
Children need love, especially when they do not deserve it. - Harold Hulbert
Mother is the name for God in the lips and hearts of little children. ~William Makepeace Thackeray
God could not be everywhere, so he created mothers. ~Jewish Proverb
The best conversations with mothers always take place in silence, when only the heart speaks. ~Carrie Latet





Last edited by beck12; April 22nd, 2009 at 10:40 AM.
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  #4  
April 22nd, 2009, 10:49 AM
blondie-lox's Avatar Do NOT feed the Troll
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Quote:
Originally Posted by beck12 View Post
People gave me grief too ....I ALWAYS countered by telling them that EVERY medical association out there will tell you that the baby's PRIMARY nutrition for the ENTIRE first year is supposed to be BM or formula with the intro of solids to be primarily for texture & taste introduction. Their little tummies aren't designed to be able to break down & absorb most of the nutrients in those foods anyway. Ask your Dr to produce something in writing that says that BM isn't enough for the first year. I can bet he won't be able to come up with ANYTHING. You can share this too: Fat and Energy Contents of Expressed Human Breast Milk in Prolonged Lactation -- Mandel et al. 116 (3): e432 -- Pediatrics It shows that the longer you BF the fattier your milk is....thus proving that your body adjusts your milk to accommodate your growing baby. So the milk you are giving him today is MUCH richer than it was 8 months ago....your body knows how to cater to his growing needs!

This may help you too: Lack Of Interest In Solids - La Leche League Mother-to-Mother Forums All these moms seem to had the same thing going on....I think it is totally normal!

Secondly - since they are YOUR bbs - then THEY shouldn't worry about it! If you are happy & he is happy, then not to worry.

This article is a good read even if he isn't having this exact problem....it has good ideas on some things that may cross over well. Help! My Baby Hates Solid Foods! - Baby - Families.com Michelle might like this one too!

And if all else fails...ask them (meaning ANYONE harassing you ) to provide you with info on how BM ISN'T adequate nutrition at this age....and THEN you will discuss it with them at length. They won't be able to find anything & you should be done having that talk...at least for a while.

HUGS - it stinks. I got a lecture at Jonah's 7 month appt that if I had been giving him "adequate" solids he would have more teeth??? I never saw that Dr again.

THANK YOU Beck! I really appreciate all this, you really put my mind at ease and now I will be armed with some great info! I can't believe your Dr told you that! Glad you never saw him again!
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  #5  
April 22nd, 2009, 05:40 PM
mommabirdof4
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I am right there with you...my son is 10 months old and only eats pureed foods...and only a few times a week because he just isn't into it much. He didn't have any solids until 8 months because he just had no interest.

Believe me I bottle nurse and I am already getting "advice" from people to take the bottle away from him. Some people say "oh just don't give him formula and then he will get hungry and eat"....HELLO!!!!! I don't think sooo!!
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  #6  
April 22nd, 2009, 06:07 PM
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I couldn't have said it better than Beckie did!

It's like when people tell you to introduce a bottle so you can get a "break"...what the heck do they care? They're your boobs, he's your child, why do they care how much, how often he nurses or what else he is eating?

I have no idea how to respond to them, I guess I would just tell them he's not ready and to mind thier own business if they are going to harrass you about it.
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  #7  
April 23rd, 2009, 07:13 AM
keekopeeko's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Im SO glad you guys brought this up! my DD recently turned 6 months and i introduced solids.. and she just hates them! she crys the MINUTE i put her in the high chair.. i hate forcing her to eat.. but i was thinking that 6 months was when you SHOULD introduce solids.. So now that i see some of you still EBF and trying solids now and then is ok.. i wont feel so bad that solids arent going to be a very big part of her food intake right now.. or for a few months yet even..

She loves the boobs!

~Em
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  #8  
April 23rd, 2009, 07:57 AM
MilkyJo's Avatar Veteran
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Weaning onto solids is such a minefield of contradictory information, it drives me up the wall sometimes.

For amusement, here's a sample of the mish-mash of useless advise we get in the UK:

My health visitors keep telling me to start feeding Ben meat, because according to their official advice, a baby's iron stores have depleted by six months so it is important to give them iron rich food. They also encouraged me to start weaning Ben from four months of age, onto baby rice and then pureed vegetables or fruit. Meanwhile, the UK food standards agency offers the advice not to start until the baby is at least SIX months old, as apparently there is a risk of allergies if you begin too soon when the immune system is not ready. It mentions nothing about a lack of iron by six months, but it does advise giving your baby vitamin drops, but only if you are not formula feeding?! Other sources adivse that all a baby really needs up until the age of one is breastmilk, anything else is just aiding him or her to get used to the texture and taste of solid food.

In the end I came to the conclusion that so long as Ben is gaining weight and happy and healthy, then I don't see the point in forcing anything on him he isn't ready for just because he's reached some arbitrary age (four, six, eight months or whatever). As it happens, Ben quite enjoys his food (he sees feeding time more as a painting game lol), but if he had got upset with solids, I wouldn't have pushed it either. I'd just leave it a week or two, then try again.
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Last edited by MilkyJo; April 23rd, 2009 at 08:03 AM.
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  #9  
April 23rd, 2009, 08:06 AM
Mountain~Mama's Avatar ThePastHasNoPowerOverMe
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I would tell these "advise givers" to mind their own buisness! There is NOTHING wrong with EBF your LO. Do what you feel is right and ignore the rest. You are a great Mama and don't let anyone get you down!
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  #10  
April 23rd, 2009, 08:20 AM
horseradishmayo's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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my Lo wasn't really interested in solids at 8 months either. until babies can pick up food and feed themselves they really aren't ready. you could sit him in his high chair with small finger foods like peas or brown rice. if he feeds himself then great! if not, he's just not ready and at least you offered.
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  #11  
April 23rd, 2009, 08:37 AM
beck12's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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http://www.justmommies.com/forums/f3...vs-solids.html (Nursing -vs- Solids)

http://www.justmommies.com/forums/f3...t-nowhere.html (Picky eating out of nowhere....)


Okay I made another post that got eaten somewhere...

But these are two threads you may like from Breastfeeding past one year that kind of cover some of this....
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We've begun to raise daughters more like sons... but few have the courage to raise our sons more like our daughters. ~Gloria Steinem

If a man has been his mother's undisputed darling he retains throughout life the triumphant feeling, the confidence in success, which not seldom brings actual success along with it. ~Sigmund Freud
My mom is a neverending song in my heart of comfort, happiness, and being. I may sometimes forget the words but I always remember the tune. ~Graycie Harmon
Don't wait to make your son a great man - make him a great boy. ~Author Unknown
You don't raise heroes, you raise sons. And if you treat them like sons, they'll turn out to be heroes, even if it's just in your own eyes. ~Walter M. Schirra, Sr.
A man loves his sweetheart the most, his wife the best, but his mother the longest. ~Irish Proverb
Mother's love is peace. It need not be acquired, it need not be deserved. ~Erich Fromm
Children need love, especially when they do not deserve it. - Harold Hulbert
Mother is the name for God in the lips and hearts of little children. ~William Makepeace Thackeray
God could not be everywhere, so he created mothers. ~Jewish Proverb
The best conversations with mothers always take place in silence, when only the heart speaks. ~Carrie Latet




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  #12  
April 23rd, 2009, 08:56 AM
Snowpeas
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When he's ready to eat he'll eat. Breast milk is a wonderful thing! Keep it up momma! ((hugs))
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  #13  
April 23rd, 2009, 09:10 AM
blondie-lox's Avatar Do NOT feed the Troll
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Quote:
Originally Posted by beck12 View Post
http://www.justmommies.com/forums/f3...vs-solids.html (Nursing -vs- Solids)

http://www.justmommies.com/forums/f3...t-nowhere.html (Picky eating out of nowhere....)


Okay I made another post that got eaten somewhere...

But these are two threads you may like from Breastfeeding past one year that kind of cover some of this....
Thanks for these Beckie! They were a real help. I feel so much better now knowing this is normal and is just fine for my son.
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  #14  
April 23rd, 2009, 03:19 PM
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  #15  
April 23rd, 2009, 03:49 PM
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My son is 15 months and has always been a picky eater. I introduced solids at 6 months, but he didn't want any of it until around 8 or 9 months, and even then it was just a few ounces a day. He didn't really start eating until a year or so, and he still goes through a week here and there where all he wants his milk. When he eats really poorly I try and give him a vitamin with added iron, because that's really the only think your milk really lacks after 9 months. Also try and get him out in the sun for that vitamin D, or buy some to give him orally. Babies will eat when they are hungry, and if he doesn't want food, your milk must be doing something good for him!
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  #16  
April 24th, 2009, 06:24 AM
10x_A_Mommy's Avatar formerly mom_of_8
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My daughter Ashlyn didn't eat solids til she was 11.5 months old. She wanted absolutely nothing to do with them. She was my 1st to not want solids so I talked to my ped about it and she said it was perfectly fine to ebf her even beyond a year old - and to just make sure I was eating healthy.

I'm hearing alot of crap from people saying I should be giving Gavin cow's milk now. I just tell them what's the point when I have an endless supply on tap?
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  #17  
April 24th, 2009, 02:28 PM
KatiesGirls
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Keep up the great work Laurel! As long as you are both happy, never mind the nay sayers!!!
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  #18  
April 24th, 2009, 02:53 PM
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Experts screamed at me that she should start on solids after 4 months. A lady in JM told me to look on it better and she was right. Stephanie was not/still is not (quite) ready to start yet. Told ped and she said no she is read. I insisted that i will not start her on solids earlier than her 6 months AND IF she shows positive signs i will continue. And when i say 6 months i mean her DUE DATE 6 months not her birthday since she came a month early.......ped told me i read too much Go figure....
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  #19  
April 24th, 2009, 03:24 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kristenpie View Post
My son is 15 months and has always been a picky eater. I introduced solids at 6 months, but he didn't want any of it until around 8 or 9 months, and even then it was just a few ounces a day. He didn't really start eating until a year or so, and he still goes through a week here and there where all he wants his milk. When he eats really poorly I try and give him a vitamin with added iron, because that's really the only think your milk really lacks after 9 months. Also try and get him out in the sun for that vitamin D, or buy some to give him orally. Babies will eat when they are hungry, and if he doesn't want food, your milk must be doing something good for him!
To the bolded, there are two schools of thought about that. I made I'm taking the iron because of it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ellemphriem View Post
Experts screamed at me that she should start on solids after 4 months. A lady in JM told me to look on it better and she was right. Stephanie was not/still is not (quite) ready to start yet. Told ped and she said no she is read. I insisted that i will not start her on solids earlier than her 6 months AND IF she shows positive signs i will continue. And when i say 6 months i mean her DUE DATE 6 months not her birthday since she came a month early.......ped told me i read too much Go figure....
God forbid you educate yourself, eh? ((big hugs)) You're 100% right here hon. We'll support you through that.

Cheers,

Michelle
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  #20  
April 24th, 2009, 03:58 PM
beck12's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ellemphriem View Post
Experts screamed at me that she should start on solids after 4 months. A lady in JM told me to look on it better and she was right. Stephanie was not/still is not (quite) ready to start yet. Told ped and she said no she is read. I insisted that i will not start her on solids earlier than her 6 months AND IF she shows positive signs i will continue. And when i say 6 months i mean her DUE DATE 6 months not her birthday since she came a month early.......ped told me i read too much Go figure....
If there is any chance you can get a new Pedi - go for it & dump her. I have had so many bad experiences with Drs & now I finally found a great one & it is SUCH a relief to not dread visits, and actually look forward to them. I am sorry you got grief (too many of us have) - but you have EVERY right to tell her where to stick it - YOU are the customer...paying her to do a service FOR you & your child....not to tell you how to parent. This kind of stuff from Dr's really grinds me because it oversteps the boundaries AND they are just plain wrong many times.
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We've begun to raise daughters more like sons... but few have the courage to raise our sons more like our daughters. ~Gloria Steinem

If a man has been his mother's undisputed darling he retains throughout life the triumphant feeling, the confidence in success, which not seldom brings actual success along with it. ~Sigmund Freud
My mom is a neverending song in my heart of comfort, happiness, and being. I may sometimes forget the words but I always remember the tune. ~Graycie Harmon
Don't wait to make your son a great man - make him a great boy. ~Author Unknown
You don't raise heroes, you raise sons. And if you treat them like sons, they'll turn out to be heroes, even if it's just in your own eyes. ~Walter M. Schirra, Sr.
A man loves his sweetheart the most, his wife the best, but his mother the longest. ~Irish Proverb
Mother's love is peace. It need not be acquired, it need not be deserved. ~Erich Fromm
Children need love, especially when they do not deserve it. - Harold Hulbert
Mother is the name for God in the lips and hearts of little children. ~William Makepeace Thackeray
God could not be everywhere, so he created mothers. ~Jewish Proverb
The best conversations with mothers always take place in silence, when only the heart speaks. ~Carrie Latet




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