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Trying to figure it out....


Forum: Attachment Parenting

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  #1  
April 24th, 2009, 02:31 PM
Ellemphriem's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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what AP is actually. Have/had no clue and all till i read some of what you ladies said and man did it makes SENSE to me. I am/was like that since day 1 and i am a first time mom full of insecurities and problems. But i never thought about not following what Stephanie told me. I never tried to force her to a program and i always followed her cues. And when i do that she is happy and content. Ok, i admit i am NOT always in tune because being tired or having other problems can take it's toll on you, but when my PED sometimes tells me 'let her scream a bit, she won't die off it, you are spoiling her by picking her up whenever she cries. She knows and takes advantage of it'. Well hell maybe she does i dunno, but my instinct cries otherwise and bloody hell if i am gonna listen to the PED or any PED NO MATTER how many years experience they have and leave my daughter unable to breathe from crying so hard without picking her up and consoling her. And you know what? PED said she has no reason to cry like that, but i read many articles that speak of oversensitive babies. And something is nagging me that Stephanie is one of them. She hates overstimulation and when the PED handles her roughly for the tests PLUS that she is a stranger the poor child freaks out. That is what i get from all this. PED never asked herself WHY Stephanie smiles at her when she approaches carefully and touches her gently. Does that make any sense? PED thinks i am over protective and that i will spoil her to pieces and that i AND her will suffer. Man i cannot change my ways. EVERY cell in my body screams otherwise......and maybe i am wrong and i will pay for it in the end, but if this is AP then i am FOR IT full throttle......
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Last edited by Ellemphriem; April 24th, 2009 at 02:34 PM.
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  #2  
April 24th, 2009, 02:38 PM
KatiesGirls
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I hope you love it here!!!

Wow. If I were you I would seriously consider switching PEDs. I am so sad when I hear people insisting that if you do this or that you will spoil your infant. Just like in so many other ways, our kids are being forced to grow up faster than they would naturally. Lord forbid if your baby acts *gasp* like a baby and needs you to act *gasp* like a mother!

I am glad you're here! I know you will love it!!!
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  #3  
April 24th, 2009, 02:47 PM
Ellemphriem's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FranksGirls View Post
Lord forbid if your baby acts *gasp* like a baby and needs you to act *gasp* like a mother!
Thank you!! LOL Yeah i really don't get that either Sometimes i admit i am scared to death that i will indeed spoil her and that she is gonna suffer later on, but ...BUT whenever she cries i see a SOLID reason behind it (overstimulation, hunger, pain or what have you). I never see it as acting out....(well not yet, she is too young yet). Mother in law said the other day when i pointed out that she is tired (i saw it clearly) and needs a nap 'Ah, come on always nap nap nap, leave her alone for awhile. I'll tire her so much she will fall to sleep immediately'. Granted she did like the time with her granny but kwim?? Also DH DOES THAT constantly. I KEEP telling him that she needs sleep and he has his own idea that she doesn't and he stimulates her, resulting in bloody screams. Funny isn't it that when i come over and take over her she sleeps within 5 freaking minutes??? arghhhh........They all make me feel insecure about my instincts sometimes
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  #4  
April 24th, 2009, 03:05 PM
KatiesGirls
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Ahhh...

I think it has something to do with being a first time mom. When we had our first, EVERYONE wanted to tell us how to do things. Even dh would question why I did things sometimes (like co-sleeping). What I find interesting is that this time around I don't think I've gotten so much as a peep.

(aside from girls in my PR) LOL
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  #5  
April 24th, 2009, 06:26 PM
mommabirdof4
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You can't spoil a baby....if that was the case then they would sleep in the Fridge....lol...sorry that is what my dad says!

Seriously...you can't spoil a baby.
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  #6  
April 24th, 2009, 07:51 PM
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Welcome! I don't see you around the PR much anymore, but I glad you stopped in here.

I HATE when doctors try to give parenting advice. What business is it of theirs? It doesn't affect my child's health if I hold her a lot or put her to sleep instead of making her do it on her own. I'm so glad we finally found a doctor who sticks to my children's health issues and doesnt' try to give me unwanted advice on how to raise them.
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  #7  
April 25th, 2009, 12:16 AM
Ellemphriem's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by andi2284 View Post
Welcome! I don't see you around the PR much anymore, but I glad you stopped in here.

I HATE when doctors try to give parenting advice. What business is it of theirs? It doesn't affect my child's health if I hold her a lot or put her to sleep instead of making her do it on her own. I'm so glad we finally found a doctor who sticks to my children's health issues and doesnt' try to give me unwanted advice on how to raise them.
Hi, nice to see you also. I had issues in the PR...mainly no one answered LOL (don't mind just said jokingly)....anyhow you ladies seem friendly and at least i can get answers. As for the doc you'd better believe it she is gonna change. I don't think she will last long with us. I hate the fact that she never listens to me either SAD....i think everyone should listen to what the mother has to say EVEN if she is a first timer. Somethings she just knows....kwim?
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