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i feel like im almost there..AP but not co-sleeping?


Forum: Attachment Parenting

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  #1  
April 30th, 2009, 06:22 AM
keekopeeko's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: virginia
Posts: 7,278
So i feel like i fit in really well here.. but ive been putting off formally introducing myself because there are some AP things i dont follow and im not sure if i am ENOUGH AP to REALLY belong..

the big one for me is co-sleeping.. i have NO problem with other people doing it.. i in fact envy them.. But i cant do it! Ive tried.. i dont get a wink of sleep.. If my DH is in the bed i have very limited space for me and the baby..i refuse to put the baby between us becuz i know for a fact DH has no awareness of the baby there in the middle of the night... so because of that.. and numerous other reasons.. co-sleeping just doesnt work for me.. When my DH leaves at 5:45 am, or so, the girls then come into bed with me and i sleep like a log.. but i just cant if he's there.. and i cant kick him out of bed..

SO because i dont co-sleep i feel like i am not a very good AP parent... But i do most everything else AP style..

So do i count?

Just in case! My name is Em i am 25.. my DH is Matt .. He is 28.. we've been married for almost 5 years.. Our first DD is named Layla and shes 3.. and our second DD is named Eva and she is 6 months old ( and hates solids and is still EBF)

~Em
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~Em, Married to Matt since 7/3/04. Mommy to Layla 3/29/06, Eva 10/18/08, Zeke 2/4/11 and Jonah 7/28/13

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  #2  
April 30th, 2009, 06:33 AM
mommabirdof4
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being AP isn't about a checklist or anything. I was unable to Breastfeed my son but I still consider myself very AP. Also since I am preggo I can't wear my son...I have to use a stroller(which I hate and he doesn't care much for either) but I can't do the carrier anymore. One book that I read that really helped me see that is wasn't an all or nothing kind of thing was The Attachment Parenting Book by Dr. Sears.

I think you belong here.....
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  #3  
April 30th, 2009, 06:56 AM
*Bobbie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Rochester, NY
Posts: 15,851
Em...you DO belong here. AP isn't about being doing everything... but more a state of mind. I think you are gonna love this board as much as I do. No one is going to judge you here. Not everyone here co-sleeps. I never realized there was such a thing as AP it's just what has always come natural to me. I always knew I did things different than most, but never knew there were so many people out there who parent like I do.

Welcome to the board!
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step-mom to: Stephany (23) and Krista (20)
step-grandma to: Wesley (3), Rosemarie (7 months)



On 1/31/12 at exactly 16 weeks pregnant Noah came too soon. He was our 7th loss
If you would like to see pictures of my sweet (but tiny) boy they can be viewed at www.caringbridge.org/visit/noahdarrohn they aren't the easiest pictures to look at but I am willing to share them with anyone who would like to see them <3
On August 2, 2012 we lost Sarah at 17 weeks. She was our 8th loss Her pictures can be viewed at http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/sarahdarrohn
There is no known explanation for my losses.

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  #4  
April 30th, 2009, 07:14 AM
Resi's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: Indianapolis, IN
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You belong! It's not all or nothing. Welcome.
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  #5  
April 30th, 2009, 08:18 AM
blondie-lox's Avatar Do NOT feed the Troll
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Welcome!!!
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  #6  
April 30th, 2009, 10:58 AM
Effervescence's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Posts: 6,791
I don't co-sleep either! So if you don't belong, then I don't belong... and well I have no where else to go LOL

You fit right in here
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  #7  
April 30th, 2009, 12:12 PM
KatiesGirls
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Glad you're here!!!

AP is different for everyone! We only co-sleep because it works for us right now, but the moment it doesn't we will transition to something else. Julie was out of our bed around 6 months, Kaylee is almost 8 months and is still in with us. If things become dangerous, we wouldn't co-sleep either.
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  #8  
April 30th, 2009, 12:21 PM
kwestern's Avatar Coolest Mom Ever
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Location: Minneapolis, MN
Posts: 7,337
AP is definitely not all or nothing. Welcome
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  #9  
April 30th, 2009, 03:56 PM
kristen121's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 4,513
We don't co-sleep either. Lately DD hasn't even been sleeping in our room with us, she's been in her own crib in her room. Check out the welcome sticky, there's a lot of good info there.
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  #10  
April 30th, 2009, 04:33 PM
ItalySarah's Avatar Proud Attached Mommy
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Location: North Carolina
Posts: 11,465
I agree with everyone else. Just b/c you dont co-sleep doesnt mean you are any less AP. I am sure you are going to love it here!
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  #11  
April 30th, 2009, 06:44 PM
HS&Fsmom's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Location: NC
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We are very AP and no longer cosleep. Hugo was at the point where he just seemed "ready" to try his crib and it actually was the right time for him (I was kind of sad- he was only 10 mos.). My husband was also not getting sleep as you are experiencing b/c Hugo had started tossing and turning so much, so it was a natural time to move. All babies have to move into their own bed at some point... the beauty of AP is that it recognizes that all families and all babies are different! I definitely think you can be AP w/out cosleeping... we could not breastfeed either due to extensive latch issues with Hugo but I definitely considered our bottle feeding "nursing"!
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  #12  
April 30th, 2009, 07:15 PM
(.Y.)mom2dd(.Y.)
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kellymom.com :: There is No Doctrine for Attachment Parenting: Being AP is a Frame of Mind!
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  #13  
April 30th, 2009, 07:59 PM
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Location: Michigan
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Welcome!
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  #14  
May 1st, 2009, 01:52 AM
0110011001101100011101010
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Finland
Posts: 4,481
Welcome.
Btw cosleeping isnt just sleeping with the baby in the bed, it is also called cosleeping if the baby is near to you/in the same room. Baby in bed is bedsharing... if you like to get technical.
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  #15  
May 1st, 2009, 05:19 AM
Beaker's Avatar My boys are adorable
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Missouri
Posts: 5,695
Quote:
Originally Posted by Effervescence View Post
I don't co-sleep either! So if you don't belong, then I don't belong... and well I have no where else to go LOL

You fit right in here
ditto!
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  #16  
May 1st, 2009, 09:10 AM
keekopeeko's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: virginia
Posts: 7,278
thank you girls! I love this place so much! and all the support youve already given me in choosing baby carriers .. not telling my Ped that my baby still wakes up at night.. and still EBF at her age.. And also the support you all gave me in helping me feel comfortable enough to gently take away my 3 year olds paci in her own time!

~Em
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~Em, Married to Matt since 7/3/04. Mommy to Layla 3/29/06, Eva 10/18/08, Zeke 2/4/11 and Jonah 7/28/13

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  #17  
May 1st, 2009, 09:19 AM
KimberlyD0
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Welcome!! I don't co-sleep either. Not for me but I am still AP.
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  #18  
May 1st, 2009, 09:45 AM
broxi3781's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: belfast, northern ireland
Posts: 1,563
Co sleeping isnt for everyone. We love it and it works great for us, but we are not all clones!
You really seem to fit in very well here, t me attachment parenting id more about the love and attachment then anything else.
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  #19  
May 1st, 2009, 10:09 AM
(.Y.)mom2dd(.Y.)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by keekopeeko View Post
thank you girls! I love this place so much! and all the support youve already given me in choosing baby carriers .. not telling my Ped that my baby still wakes up at night.. and still EBF at her age.. And also the support you all gave me in helping me feel comfortable enough to gently take away my 3 year olds paci in her own time!

~Em
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  #20  
May 1st, 2009, 02:54 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Crazytown
Posts: 1,798
We just transitioned DS to the crib at 8 months as NO ONE was getting any sleep anymore.

I agree with the other ladies... you definitely belong here
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