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  #1  
July 22nd, 2009, 11:40 AM
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I feel like a broken record when it comes to my 1yr old. I am always telling him no sternly and he laughs and does it anyways. I dont know what to do to get him to understand. My mom seems to think spanking him will help and i keep telling her i am not gonna spank him, i believe in gentle discipline.
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  #2  
July 22nd, 2009, 11:46 AM
10x_A_Mommy's Avatar formerly mom_of_8
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Location: Tennessee
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My 1 year old is the same way. He's 15 months today. I tell him no and he laughs and shakes his head no, then continues to do whatever it is he's doing. I use redirection, sometimes it takes moving him 20+ times, but eventually he catches on that I'm just going to move him again and he moves on to something else. I think spanking, at this age especially, is not a good idea.
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  #3  
July 22nd, 2009, 12:27 PM
MilkyJo's Avatar Veteran
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Location: UK, Berkshire
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My 10 month old is the same - I say no to him and he looks at me and smiles, then carries on lol. I just keep moving him away until he gets the idea that I'm not going to let him play with the fireplace/door hinges/cat's tail etc. It's boring and repetitive, but I don't think there is a quick solution. I wouldn't spank either. All they learn from that is that it is OK to hit someone when they're naughty or doing something you don't like.
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  #4  
July 22nd, 2009, 12:44 PM
mamatomaica's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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If possible make your home a more yes environment.. anything that can be moved should be moved out of the way until he's old enough to understand.
redirection, distraction, change of scenery are all good ways of dealing with this age. If hes doing something thats not okay in a particular area... like throwing stuff then say 'we don't throw here, but its okay to throw a ball outside instead' he's young to understand, but its a good habit to start now as you'll use it later!
xx
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  #5  
July 22nd, 2009, 02:36 PM
KatiesGirls
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Amelie View Post
If possible make your home a more yes environment.. anything that can be moved should be moved out of the way until he's old enough to understand.
redirection, distraction, change of scenery are all good ways of dealing with this age. If hes doing something thats not okay in a particular area... like throwing stuff then say 'we don't throw here, but its okay to throw a ball outside instead' he's young to understand, but its a good habit to start now as you'll use it later!
xx
totally agree!!!!
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  #6  
July 22nd, 2009, 04:05 PM
ItalySarah's Avatar Proud Attached Mommy
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Location: North Carolina
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I agree with Amelie.

In my experience the best thing to do is make things easy for the child.

Also, I find that using no for emergencies only is way more effective. Usually, I use "eent" sounds to distract Bella and the I move her.
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  #7  
July 22nd, 2009, 04:19 PM
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ask drsears.com is an excellent site/resourse for ideas and techniques for gentle discipline, it is alot of work, but the pay-off is tremendous.
The yes environment is HUGE!!!! Also having an instant alternative:you can have this or do this instead of saying no.
Its really hard to switch gears to gentle displine particularly if you were not raised in a very gentle environment.
Good luck and keep asking/looking for alternatives!!
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  #8  
July 23rd, 2009, 07:45 AM
broxi3781's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I make the home a more yes environment as well. If i dont want him getting into it, i put it out of reach. Where that doesnt work, we use redirection, and where neither will work, such as at grandmas, where everything is no, I just pick him up at this age.
We also use subsituition, such as giving him a ball when he is throwing tea cups,
and I use the word yuck instead of no for putting things in the mouth.
I think spanking at this age only really teaches children to hit.
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  #9  
July 23rd, 2009, 10:53 AM
~*Kixs*~'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I have the most kid friendly house and still find myself saying no. But I don't do it sturnly. With my oldest I found that it just scared her and she would cry. So instead I started saying "no, no, no" in my mom voice and wagging my finger at her. It worked wonders! I do this with DS too. I don't even have to say No anymore...just say their name and wag my finger at them and they usally stop. I am like the others and save the harsh NO for dangerous situations.

My little guy is two weeks younger than your DS And for us picking him up and moving him to a different task is key. A childs job is to explore and test their limits...how else would they learn? I don't want my child to think he is in trouble just for doing something I don't like. Instead I try to reinforce acceptable behavor.

Good luck! The toddler years will keep you on your toes
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  #10  
July 23rd, 2009, 12:56 PM
forest's Avatar Cara, Mom to two girls
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ~*Kixs*~ View Post
I have the most kid friendly house and still find myself saying no. But I don't do it sturnly. With my oldest I found that it just scared her and she would cry. So instead I started saying "no, no, no" in my mom voice and wagging my finger at her. It worked wonders! I do this with DS too. I don't even have to say No anymore...just say their name and wag my finger at them and they usally stop. I am like the others and save the harsh NO for dangerous situations.

My little guy is two weeks younger than your DS And for us picking him up and moving him to a different task is key. A childs job is to explore and test their limits...how else would they learn? I don't want my child to think he is in trouble just for doing something I don't like. Instead I try to reinforce acceptable behavor.

Good luck! The toddler years will keep you on your toes
I like the finger wagging idea! I am totally going to try that. I mostly use redirection right now but sometimes you do have to tell them no.
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  #11  
July 23rd, 2009, 02:15 PM
mamatomaica's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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the finger wagging and the no no no in a funny voice is just brilliant! i've just started doing that with maica because she gets so upset when i say no.
xx
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