[Jule'sMomInOR]

The nanny we were talking to with super credentials (graduate degree in child development) already found another job. I have spoken to two other prospective nannies on the phone and one via email. One has really great credentials and has either worked in a daycare or been a nanny for a total of 9 years. She's 27 now. The only real downside to her is that she isn't moving to Portland until approximately July 20th so we wouldn't get to meet her until then. She would then like to have about 2 weeks to settle in, during which time she would work for us one day per week, before being ready to start full-time in early August. The timing is just about perfect with when my mom was planning to be here. I suppose the next step with her would be to Skype to get to know each other. Then I would make her a tentative offer subject to us getting to know each other in late July.

The other one I talked to is 22 years old with an associates in elementary education. She works as a nanny but very part-time, 9 hours per week doing after school care and 2 hours at her church nursery, plus the occasional date-night babysitting. She's never had a full-time childcare position but has always done lots of babysitting and took care of her 3 younger siblings. She only asked for $10/hour but I told her we would pay $11. My big concern with her is that it takes more patience to be a nanny for 35 hours/week than 11 hours per week so even though her references are great it may not be comparable. She is very likable though, and seems to be a child at heart, so even though her credentials aren't as good as the others she's definitely in the running.

The third one is 23 and going to school for early childhood education and is currently a nanny. She's not available until the kids she's currently work for go back to school after Labor Day, so the timing is not quite perfect there but I have reserved some vacation that I could use for the last week of August if necessary. I haven't had the chance to talk on the phone with her yet but she seems promising, other than meaning I would probably have to ask my mom to stay even longer.

I talked to both of the top two for a while and asked questions about how they would deal with tantrums, etc and was very satisfied with their answers.

Any thoughts on these prospective candidates?

[ashj_1218]

Okay...my thoughts...

Is the third candidate used to working with younger clients? That would be important (since her current charges are obviously school age). And what would her school schedule entail during the year. When would she be working on her homework? I mean, a 35-hour a week job with school on the side can lead to burn out. If she is part-time school, it would be better. I just know I did one semester of full-time school with Julia and felt wrecked after the 12th week. I believe I used some excessive sick time those last few weeks...although would have to ask Julia's mom if she remembers to be sure. I learned to only take part-time classes (but I was with Julia more like 50 hours a week).

The first candidate...how were the references?

I think they speak the most for the candidate at hand. I would need hers to be glowing. But after 9 years, I would imagine they would be. Why is she moving to Portland? Any family close? Also, the most concerning thing with her is that she might have her own "parenting" techniques after nine years. Which could be great if they match yours...but could be a downfall if they are different. The benefit of a younger candidate is the "learnability" of them.

The second one..I wouldn't discount her just because of the hours. In lots of ways, caring for only one family at a time is easier than multiple small jobs. And more rewarding. The references remarks, and her youth, both would lean me that direction. Plus, I see her potential happiness with salary as a bonus (I imagine the first candidate is going to be rather pricey). But I see your concern with the hours being a big change. Has she every held a full time job of any kind? Is she local? Is her family local? Do you know if she lives with her parents?

I am giving you no answers...and more questions But my gut reaction in relation to each candidate is (in order of top running to third running is):

Candidate two
Canidate one
Canidate three

[crunchywannabe]

I was a nanny for the past 5 yrs, 3 of which with with the same 2 families. I moved away to follow my husband to a new career location and that is what ended the 3 yr position.

My way of looking at it is that you need to go with your gut. Who do you feel like you could tolerate being in your home? I'm assuming this is a live out situation. By the end of my 3 yr position, I knew every detail of my bosses private lives, and I imagine, there isn't much about me they didn't know. Hiring a nanny creates a very different relationship than most employer/employee ones. There is a level of personal interaction, that can create close bonds, and also cause hurt feelings much easier.

It is also NOT about who can quote Freud word for word out of a book, but who bonds and builds a strong relationship with your child. Who loves and cares for your child like you would in your absence. You will never find another you. Holding any nanny to that standard is an impossible goal for her to reach. Find the person who will do the best job, but don't hold it against her that she's not you.

Age has almost nothing to do with ability to do the job well. My first 'family' hired me with no Nanny experience, and they are still some of my best references! I wouldn't have gained the experience other families look for if not for them.

My recommendation would be to not rush into anything. Getting to know someone on a computer is ok, but watching them interact with your child will be the best indicator of how good a fit they will be. You also have to keep in mind that they may back out if your family is not a good fit for them. It has to be a 2 way street, because nothing is worse than hiring a nanny who resents being 'stuck' in a job that doesn't mesh well for her.

I wish you luck, I believe if you follow your gut, you will know what the best decision for your family is.

[Jule'sMomInOR]

Originally Posted by ashj_1218

Okay...my thoughts...

Is the third candidate used to working with younger clients? That would be important (since her current charges are obviously school age). And what would her school schedule entail during the year. When would she be working on her homework? I mean, a 35-hour a week job with school on the side can lead to burn out. If she is part-time school, it would be better. I just know I did one semester of full-time school with Julia and felt wrecked after the 12th week. I believe I used some excessive sick time those last few weeks...although would have to ask Julia's mom if she remembers to be sure. I learned to only take part-time classes (but I was with Julia more like 50 hours a week).

The first candidate...how were the references?

I think they speak the most for the candidate at hand. I would need hers to be glowing. But after 9 years, I would imagine they would be. Why is she moving to Portland? Any family close? Also, the most concerning thing with her is that she might have her own "parenting" techniques after nine years. Which could be great if they match yours...but could be a downfall if they are different. The benefit of a younger candidate is the "learnability" of them.

The second one..I wouldn't discount her just because of the hours. In lots of ways, caring for only one family at a time is easier than multiple small jobs. And more rewarding. The references remarks, and her youth, both would lean me that direction. Plus, I see her potential happiness with salary as a bonus (I imagine the first candidate is going to be rather pricey). But I see your concern with the hours being a big change. Has she every held a full time job of any kind? Is she local? Is her family local? Do you know if she lives with her parents?

I am giving you no answers...and more questions But my gut reaction in relation to each candidate is (in order of top running to third running is):

Candidate two
Canidate one
Canidate three

Candidate 3 had earlier experience at a daycare in the toddler room. In fact, I think about half of her 9 years of experience was in a daycare working with toddlers.

The references were pretty much glowing on both of the first two and I haven't gotten the chance to call them on the third yet.

Candidate 2 does live with her parents and they live in the same town. She has had a full-time job as a summer camp counselor for only 3 months and worked at The Chicken Bar for 3 months. Some of her part-time jobs are very long-term (2 years) but it doesn't look like she's done anything full-time for more than 3 months, ever. This is my biggest point of concern with her. She claims to be a kid at heart, but I wonder if she is reliable.

Candidate 1 did not really come out and tell me what she wanted for salary even when I asked. She had stated in her profile a range of $10-$15/hr and just repeated that when I asked her. That is quite a wide range. She said something about a trial period and then increasing salary. I assume I would be paying her $12-$13/hr. More than $13/hr is not an option.

Both candidates 1 and 3 are going to school. Candidate 3 said she will go half-time to school and she is doing that now with a 25-hour work week, but admitted even this can be challenging. Candidate 1 wants to take either 3 or 4 classes at a time but probably won't be able to start until January. I do think she will be overwhelmed with this and may even quit because she mentioned that since her husband makes plenty of money and what she makes is spending money (she only brought this up because she said it was fine if I travel and she doesn't get paid for a while).

[Jule'sMomInOR]

Originally Posted by crunchywannabe

I was a nanny for the past 5 yrs, 3 of which with with the same 2 families. I moved away to follow my husband to a new career location and that is what ended the 3 yr position.

My way of looking at it is that you need to go with your gut. Who do you feel like you could tolerate being in your home? I'm assuming this is a live out situation. By the end of my 3 yr position, I knew every detail of my bosses private lives, and I imagine, there isn't much about me they didn't know. Hiring a nanny creates a very different relationship than most employer/employee ones. There is a level of personal interaction, that can create close bonds, and also cause hurt feelings much easier.

It is also NOT about who can quote Freud word for word out of a book, but who bonds and builds a strong relationship with your child. Who loves and cares for your child like you would in your absence. You will never find another you. Holding any nanny to that standard is an impossible goal for her to reach. Find the person who will do the best job, but don't hold it against her that she's not you.

Age has almost nothing to do with ability to do the job well. My first 'family' hired me with no Nanny experience, and they are still some of my best references! I wouldn't have gained the experience other families look for if not for them.

My recommendation would be to not rush into anything. Getting to know someone on a computer is ok, but watching them interact with your child will be the best indicator of how good a fit they will be. You also have to keep in mind that they may back out if your family is not a good fit for them. It has to be a 2 way street, because nothing is worse than hiring a nanny who resents being 'stuck' in a job that doesn't mesh well for her.

I wish you luck, I believe if you follow your gut, you will know what the best decision for your family is.

Good point! I should stop trying to analyze them on paper and just have the ones what can come over, come over and see how they do with Juliana in person.

[ashj_1218]

Oh yeah, nothing will trump interactions with juliana and your family. It will probably be what makes the decision for you. But at least looking at the stats gives you a jump start on a good fit. And who might be the person most likely to mesh with your wants/needs. It just is making the search shorter, so you don't interview one who just is not right for your life. Or who gives you the heeby Jeebies

That said...and more details added...I can see why you have concerns with the maturity (responsibility) of the second one. And the third is sounding even better. She sounds really realistic. The first, my major concern comes with the intention to go to school full time and take on a full time job. I see burn out as a very concern there. Plus her not needing the money...eh, it's something to consider when looking long-term.

What kind of term are you thinking here? Are you hoping for someone until Juliana goes to kindergarten? Or just until preschool? I always assumed you were looking long-term, but never asked.

When are you thinking of meeting your two local candidates?

[Jule'sMomInOR]

Originally Posted by ashj_1218

What kind of term are you thinking here? Are you hoping for someone until Juliana goes to kindergarten? Or just until preschool? I always assumed you were looking long-term, but never asked.

When are you thinking of meeting your two local candidates?

Good question. I haven't thought ahead all the way to kindergarten. I know we want Juliana to start preschool at 3 but it will be for 3 hours per day and we can choose from 2, 3, or 5 days per week. If we have a nanny we love, we will definitely take into consideration the number of hours she wants and that will help us choose the # of days per week. In an ideal world, she would stay with us until kindergarten (but kindergarten is only half-day her so we actually need someone until first grade!).

Candidate 3 actually brought this very thing up and wanted to be sure that this was a long-term commitment and not just a summer job because she said she gets very attached to her charges and can't handle going from job to job every few months. I thought that was sweet.

We are meeting candidate 2 on Friday night and candidate 3 for lunch on Saturday! I should have more info then.

[Jule'sMomInOR]

Well, we had candidates 2 and 3 over yesterday and today.

First, Juliana really liked candidate 2 from the start, but I think a lot of that had to do with the fact that she looks just like our previous nanny and was in a good mood. I did like her, but she's really only been a nanny before for a month, 9 hours per week. She has been working at the church nursery for 2 hours per week, for about a year. She does seem to really have a way with kids and I think that part would be great. I just don't get a real professional vibe from her, but I guess that's ok. One of her references did say that the only issue with her was that on a Monday she told her she couldn't make it to work the next Wednesday, for a reason she should have known about well in advance.

Candidate 3 was very professional and brought her resume, driving record, letters of recommendation and samples of art projects she had done with other kids. The problem was that the second she walked in the door, Juliana started crying! She spent half of the interview nursing to calm herself. I think she was in a bad mood. She is usually slow to warm up to people, so I don't hold it against her much. This one was quieter and not super bubbly, but she still seemed to have a great personality and I liked her. Her references described her as being part of the family. She even spent the night at one family's house while the parents went somewhere overnight. Obviously that requires a lot of trust.

It may come down to cost. I think I prefer candidate 3 overall due to her professionalism and history as a nanny, but she'll be getting paid $13/hr (which is less than the $14-$18 listed in her profile) and candidate 2 was very happy to get $11/hr. DH says he's leaning towards candidate 2 because she's "good enough" and we will say $3,000/yr. I'm really, really on the fence.

Another benefit to candidate 2 is that she is not going to be going to school and would have plenty of flexibility to stay late if I need her to, while candidate 3 will need to leave on time to get to class.

Since both candidates were willing to start a few hours per week immediately, I suppose I would have time to basically do a trial run with candidate 2 and see how she does. If she doesn't work out, we don't really need to find someone else until August. In light of that, I feel like I may be leaning towards her, but I'm very on the fence.