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Oh boy, the last few weeks have been challenging to say the least. Tommy gets angry if someone touches his stuff, if Lily takes a goldfish, melt downs over everything!!! Talking to him and redirecting hasn't been working. I've been doing the calm down couch, which he sits on his little couch with a box of things he likes in a room away from what has been upsetting him. We created our box using some of the stuff in this link, I have to say it has really helped over the last few days. I just wanted to share with you, I think it's a great way to remove your child from the overwhelming situation.
Other things we do:
*Each kid has a few special items no one is allowed to use without asking.
*Reward our kids when they either a) work out the problem calmly or b) ask for help in a nice way instead of lashing out when they have a problem. (this takes time and to be honest doesn't start happening with any regularity until later, maybe 3 or 4, and then takes even longer before this skill is "perfected").
*For items the kids are fighting over (that are "shared items"), we put the toy in time out.
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PM me if have questions about autism, TTC gender swaying, natural childbirth, going "vaccine-free", or if you are looking for gentle discipline advice.
We use MB's crib when we do resort to time out. We take all of toys out, leaving only pillow and blankets. We only try this after trying talking to her about x behavior, we follow this with an offer of something is usually a guaranteed redirection, if all of these fail( there are about 6 options). We give her a few mins to just have her fit, the try to redirect again, if it fails again we tell her again "the why", and then offer the choices again. If it fails we then say you have two choices this or or you are going to time out if you continue to scream. MB listens to us really well. We don't resort to time out until we are sure that it full fledged I'm MAD tantrum screams. And most of the time goes for the offer of a specific redirection on the first try.