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Tuesday "terrible" twos


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  • 1 Post By ashj_1218

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  #1  
March 26th, 2013, 12:41 AM
IronMamma's Avatar Intactivist
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Do you really believe in the terrible twos?
Do you really or have you really noticed a huge difference when LO turned two, or around that age?
What is so "terrible"?
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  #2  
March 26th, 2013, 06:31 AM
alittlelost's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Do you really believe in the terrible twos?
Yes, and No. I think kids go through a phase sometime between the age of 2 and 5 where they seriously test limits. It's at a different time for different kids. Some kids might even go through the phase twice.

Do you really or have you really noticed a huge difference when LO turned two, or around that age?
My oldest and youngest it was around 4-5. My oldest was through it by time he was 6 1/2 (but he's delayed) and my other son, also delayed, started going through it around 4 1/2. We have problems outside of their terrible "twos" before and after, but there is a difference. My daughter hasn't been through the terrible twos as much, but she's had a hard time from about 4-5 also.

What is so "terrible"?
For us it's just been a phase where the child continually test limits and doesn't respond to consequences. Some things my boys have done:
-Thrown hard objects at each other
-Broken windows on purpose
-Break their bedroom door
-Rip the electrical socket cover out of the wall
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  #3  
March 26th, 2013, 10:05 AM
Destiny
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I think there's something to it, and I know, for me when they occurred I really noticed.

I think it mostly was about the inability to communicate. They're in a place between, where you no longer jump at their needs/wants and they can't adequately communicate. It's a very frustrating stage for mama and baby, and I can see where the moniker came from, whether or not I agree with that particular wording.
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  #4  
March 26th, 2013, 10:34 AM
alittlelost's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Oh, I do also think that 2-3 is a stage for the same reasons breathing said. You have a child who is mobile, so getting into things more, and yet not yet able to communicate and limited in comprehension. It's the time where a need for positive discipline comes in, but you didn't need discipline much before, so it feels like "nothing works" but that's just because not only do they need time to change behavior, they are ALSO getting used to this idea of "consequences" and what they mean.
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  #5  
March 26th, 2013, 11:27 AM
ashj_1218's Avatar Hiya!
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Yes and no. For the same reasons the others listed. Two can be challenging because of the newfound abilities and new restrictions being placed on those abilities. Plus, the inability to communicate ones desires exactly as they want to be communicated.

BUT, I think three is far worse than two. For the reasons Lost stated. They are developing that growing sense of independence and want to test consequences, see exactly where the limits lie, and see how much of what the parents say is actually going to happen. It's more of a "willful" stage. And I find that harder to handle than the more "innocent" trials of age two.

I also agree that some kids hit it even later than two or three. Julia had a rough age 4. She was quite mouthy at that age and experimented with just how much hurt she could cause with words. I found her "terrible fours" was mostly an emotional growth versus anything else. Which I think is what makes the threes terrible too. The emotional trials of what is acceptable behaviors and what isn't.

I think some of it is the perspective of the parent though. I, for one, have a more difficult time handling the intentional aspect of "terrible threes/fours." But some parents have a more difficult time handling the physical demands and frustrations of interpreting kids at two. It just depends on the person.
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  #6  
March 26th, 2013, 12:06 PM
bribugg13's Avatar SAHM to Pirate & Princess
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For us, it's been closer to 3. In the past few months Connor tests limits all of the time, says "no" even if he ends up doing it, and basically everything everyone else has mentioned! Tests my patience on a daily basis!
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  #7  
March 26th, 2013, 01:06 PM
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I havent noticed any terrible twos, threes or fours in my almost 5 year old. She did throw a couple of tantrums when she was two but those stopped when I stopped working so I figure it was just a reflection of me being stressed. I'm still waiting to see what my almost 2 year old is planning to do.
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