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-   -   Feeling hinky.... (http://www.justmommies.com/forums/f341-home-birth/1529339-feeling-hinky.html)

Xx5Xy1+ April 21st, 2009 02:55 AM

Feeling hinky....
 
I don't know what it is, but there is *something* about my midwife that makes me feel... off. Its almost like... you run into someone who you were the absolute, most intimate best of friends for several years, then you loose track of each other and when you find each other again there is that strange silence, like something isn't quite there but there isn't neccessarily anything wrong either. This is very very odd to me since before this pregnancy I had NEVER even laid eyes on this woman let alone had any sort of frienship or anything else with her.

Also, something I swore wouldn't happen has... Granted I'm in Germany where they view birth quite differently than in the states... there have been several times where for whatever reason I was refered to an OB (fall off a stair, bladder infection, pap, etc) and I've always seen the same guy... VERY nice man (thats the unfortunate key word of course... its a man) and he is supportive of my choosing to homebirth and has met my midwife (and didn't have anything negative to say, didn't make faces about her, nothing). So... I have a midwife that I feel a little hinky about but not neccessarily enough to call the homebirth off (she's the ONLY one in this area) and a back-up OB who I actually kinda like even though he's a guy and therefore has never personally experienced pg, childbirth, etc lol

Part of me is seriously considering UC'ing for as long as I possibly can before I call my husband (who will automatically call the mw) and hoping she misses it (hubby is ENTIRELY against UC, the only reason he's agreed to hb is because I didn't give him a choice, but he would certainly put his foot down on UC if he knew I was even remotely thinking about it. At least I can relax some knowing that if something does occur that I would need to go to the hospital to deliver I know that it would be MUCH less medicalized than in the US. Now I just have to convince my body (when its time) to go into labor just after hubby leaves for work... which will give me at least 8 uninterupted hours to let my body do what it needs to do before he would come home and try to save me (its a sweet trait most of the time, but it would irritate me in this case lol)

Ok, so I guess this was more of a (vent isn't really the right word) gut spilling than anything else... Maybe I'm just wondering what you ladies think or what you would do... there is one other option available that I need to check out... there is supposedly a birthing center here in town that tricare will pay for, but to me, thats the same as going to the hospital... and they only have two labor rooms and one tub, so if someone decides to use the tub before I'm ready to, then that would cancel my desire to even attempt a water birth... so thats part of why I haven't really looked into them yet.

Del4 June 15th, 2009 05:12 PM

Re: Feeling hinky....
 
I'm totally just lurking, but I am feeling more and more like a UC is the way to go for me, too.

Our midwife is great, but I am totally not liking the idea of having someone in my home during a very personal thing for me. I met with some docs a few weeks ago because the baby was measuring big and MW sort of freaked and luckily everything's just fine and on track, but the docs looked at me like I had 3 heads for wanting a homebirth. And the nurse - oh good lord, she was worse than anyone. Everytime she left the room, I could feel her talking about the crazy people in room whatever. Uggggh.

I keep reading stories on Bornfree! Laura Shanley's Unassisted Childbirth Page and trying to get the courage to do it. I don't think DH will be on board, either, but I can't shake this feeling like it's the way I'm supposed to go this time. I've been feeling this way the whole pregnancy, too. I guess I'm spilling my guts here, as well. I wish I could get advice from someone, somewhere, but part of me says don't say anything about this to anyone until I am positive about what I'm going to do....

GL with your decision. I really don't see anything wrong with UCs. I tried to convince myself I did these past couple months so I'd stop considering it, but it hasn't worked. It's still what I really want to do.

WendyBird June 21st, 2009 06:33 PM

Re: Feeling hinky....
 
I don't have any experience here, but I think a woman should always go with her gut. Your body is trying to tell you something, and you need to listen. Just do what you feel is right.

Isaeph June 23rd, 2009 08:42 AM

Re: Feeling hinky....
 
How did I miss this thread?? I've had two UC's now. The first I sprung on dh at like 35 weeks. I just didn't click with any of the 5mw's at the bc, and really just wanted to be home. I cried to him and told him all my research and he said he trusted me. And it was awesome. Next time it was a no-brainer. Neither of us would do a hospital birth now unless we *needed* an emergency c-section to save myself or the baby.

Isaeph June 23rd, 2009 08:43 AM

Re: Feeling hinky....
 
How did I miss this thread?? I've had two UC's now. The first I sprung on dh at like 35 weeks. I just didn't click with any of the 5mw's at the bc, and really just wanted to be home. I cried to him and told him all my research and he said he trusted me. And it was awesome. Next time it was a no-brainer. Neither of us would do a hospital birth now unless we *needed* an emergency c-section to save myself or the baby.

Oh, and my two UC birth stories are up in the unassisted section. Eleora was first and Israel was just this past December.

Del4 June 23rd, 2009 01:30 PM

Re: Feeling hinky....
 
I appreciate the replies (although this wasn't my thread lol). I spoke with DH soon after posting. He was completely against it at first. We talked a lot, I cried a lot lol and finally came to a compromise. If my step-mom would attend, he'd do his research and be fully on board. :D

I called my step-mom the following day and she happily agreed to come (she's seen all of our other kids' births, so we probably would have invited her no matter how we did it). She's a NICU charge nurse and has been working in a nicu for the last 20+ years, so I think with that background it makes DH feel a lot better just in case something is wrong with the baby that we may not notice right away.

Anyway, yeah. I'm getting the birth I've felt was right all along. And DH is reading as much as he can getting ready. haha

justjaQ June 23rd, 2009 01:52 PM

Re: Feeling hinky....
 
to del4~ wow, wtg! that's great!

Xx5Xy1+ June 24th, 2009 01:52 PM

Re: Feeling hinky....
 
LOL at least someone got something out of this thread :rofl:

Right now we're waiting to find out if we're moving to the DC metro area before Madison is due... so it may not even be an issue with this midwife. I may end up having to find a midwife who will accept me this late in my pregnancy (especially since all my records are in german). If we move, I may just find a midwife and accidently forget to call her until I'm already in transition... if she gets there in time to catch, fine, if not... at least she'll show up to do the paperwork lol

Dagg June 24th, 2009 02:28 PM

Re: Feeling hinky....
 
Recently with my failed HB, I really believe you gotta go with your gut. The whole time I was pregnant, I hoped and prayed that the midwife wouldn't make it in time.... If I were you, I would just go for UC

_Brandy_ June 26th, 2009 08:53 AM

Re: Feeling hinky....
 
Mothers intuition is a big thing, listen to it.


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