My name is Jessica, I am 23 years old, married to Nathan. We are from NY but will be Oklahoma residents come spring!! My 9 month old daughter Dakota was born in a hospital. I had 2 epidurals, the first one numbed me from the waist up and the second one only numbed one side. By the time they got the second one in, I was already feeling pressure to push and she was born about 45 minutes later. Labor lasted 13 hours from when my water broke. I only pushed 15 minutes and didn't tear at all.
I have thought about a home birth for my second one. I am not pregnant yet but its never too early to think about it!
I will be totally honest with you... my biggest fear is something being wrong with the baby or me and not being at a medical facility to get help in time. I am sure other people have had this fear before, but it really does weigh heavy on my mind!
Pain also, is another fear I have. I know I made it through Dakota's birth with epidurals that didn't work correctly, so I feel like I def. could have done it and can do it naturally the second time. I was very tense though and I am so afraid of not being able to relax enough.
I am still browsing through your forum, trying to soak in alot of info, but if any of you can help me out with some info or just some advice, please do!
Nice to meet you all!
WELCOME! I'm so glad to see you here and thrilled you are considering homebirth. I'm sure we can help with any residual fears that you have, let's start with why homebirth appeals to you? and then, what specifically are your fears about you and the baby during the birth? When I was starting this journey I researched all the complications I was afraid of and found that not only were they all totally manageable at home, they were all MUCH less likely to happen at home, since most complications of birth are due to intervention.
As far as pain and relaxation. I am doing the Bradley Method of birth. it's focus is total relaxation and the birth is fully coached by the husband. We've finally started reading the book together and it really makes a lot of sense for US. I don't know that it could work for every one, but it clicks for me. I also am now more afraid of what could happen to myslef or my baby as the result of drugs than I am of pain. :smile:
Anyway, welcome, stick around, ask lots of questions!
Hmm, home birth appeals to me because I love the idea of my baby and me being close after birth. Not sitting there with baby wrapped up so tightly and me in a hospital gown. I don't like the interference of doctors and nurses, although I did love my OB.
I also would like to have a natural birth with no drugs, but at a hospital I KNOW I would be tempted to ask for them, regardless of the bad experiences I had with the epidural the first time. They took my urine catheter out while I was still numb and I had to pee so bad but couldn't get up. I had to use a bed pan. Then a half hour later when they came to get me with a wheel chair, I told them I was still numb. How am I supposed to get into a wheel chair when I cant feel one side of my body? That is when they realized they FORGOT to turn my epidural off... this was 45 minutes after birth. The doctors also left the catheter from my epidural in my back for 12 hours after birth. That is so dangerous and even though I paged the nurses constantly, they told me that anestesia (sp) wasn't responding. I had to sleep, on my back, with the catheter in it, moving around and all. I was so sore the next morning. They also left my IV needle in my arm for just as long, when I wasn't even hooked up to the IV.
Also, I gave birth at almost 11pm at night. I didnt go to bed until 3am and still, at 5am they showed up in my room, pushing on my stomach and taking blood. I was so exhausted. They didn't have anywhere for Nathan to sleep, just a chair. He went home at night to sleep because his body couldn't physically stay in the chair any longer. That was really sad for me.
Then, after my nipples started hurting really bad from breastfeed, they got a lactation consultat to come in to check my latch. When Dakota was first born, they just told me to latch her on, I didn't know there was a certain way. By the 2nd day my nipples and purple marks all over them, from bad latching. That made the breastfeeding experience horrible for me.
As for fears, I am afraid I will bleed too much or baby will get stuck and we wont get to the hospital in time. I think its just a general fear of something going wrong, you know what I mean?
I will have to look into the Bradley Method, although my husband isn't really the strong type when it comes to this stuff, he kind of hangs back and doesn't say anything to me at all (which was good for Dakota because i didnt want people talking during contractions lol). He would do anything for me and is there emotionally, he just sort of clams up
Jeez, no wonder you don't want to go back to that hospital, sounds like those people were Great! LOL. You are so lucky serious damage wasn't done from that!
I have really good answers to your fears, but it's kind of long, so i will do it in the morning. I'm quite sick at the moment.
Just wanted to say welcome to the board; congratulations on considering a homebirth - that's a great step to take!
Thank you so much ladies!
CoveredInMommy, I hope you are feeling better!
Ok, I'm not an expert by any means, BUT.................
As far as post partum hemhorage, or PPH:
Normal bleeding just after childbirth is primarily from open blood vessels in the uterus, where the placenta was attached. As the placenta begins to separate, these vessels bleed into the uterus. Then after the placenta is delivered, the uterus usually continues to contract, closing off those blood vessels.
As long as your uterus contract normally and the placenta comes out whole the risk of PPH is really low. Nursing stimulates uterine contractions, and the uterus can also be massaged externally to get it to contract. In more extreme cases, one bite of the placenta can stop PPH in it's tracks, but I'm not sure why, LOL. The placenta should and will come out intact provided it's allowed to come out on its own, many hospital docs will pull on the cord a little to get the placenta out faster, this is SO dangerous, but hey, they've got tons of drugs they can pump into you if they screw you up :rolleyes:
Baby getting stuck. I don't really believe there is such thing, not the way tv makes it out to be anyway ;) Generally, a woman will not make a baby that is too big for her body with the exception of GD. Transverse is the only position that REQUIRES a c-section, no other way to get that baby out, but you would know what position the baby is in before the birth. Shoulder distocia, when the baby gets "stuck" can USUALLY be resolved by changing positions and making the pelvis as wide as posible. Most cases of baby getting "stuck" is caused by women being forced to labor on their backs. The baby basically has to go UPHILL through the birth canal and with the time limits docs force on birth, they time out.
There are some cases where baby can try to enter the birth canal with it's head flexed, and that can cause problems, but it can be easily identified by changes in the HB as detected by a doppler and any good midwife should be able to resolve it. my MW and I were just talking about this last visit, she had a case like that and the HB would shoot up with the contractions, baby was in pain, it's head was flexed back and couldn't get over the pelvic bone, so she had mom sit on the toilet, legs wide, making the canal and pelvic outlet as wide as possible, and the baby slipped past the pelvic muscles and was fine.]
I'm sorry I took so long to get back to you, hope this eases some of your fears. Hope I don't sound like a know it all turd :lol:
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