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-   -   Assisted or unassisted?? (http://www.justmommies.com/forums/f341-home-birth/535875-assisted-unassisted.html)

Joni927 April 12th, 2007 01:21 PM

Please let me know what you would suggest and reply if you would to let me know why! Thank you!

jhmomofmany April 12th, 2007 03:12 PM

That's a really tough question to answer without more information. If you have access to a midwife who is willing to be as hands-off as you want her to be, but still there in case of unforseen complications, then I would lean toward assisted, especially for a first-time mother. HOWEVER, if a mature, healthy and well-educated woman has no access to a midwife, I might lean more toward unassisted as long as she was realistic about possible labor complications, her ability to deal with them, and her willingness to take complete responsibility no matter what happens.

There are too many variables, so I can't decide which way to vote. :smile:

Joni927 April 12th, 2007 04:35 PM

Ok. Well I found out today that my insurance does cover a midwife and homebirth, but I haven't met any midwives yet. I feel like I could do it by myself, but since it's my first, I realize I might not quite grasp everything!

Frelle April 12th, 2007 07:34 PM

I would recommend a midwife assisted home waterbirth for you. I think if you are wanting a hands off type midwife, you can take the time to find one, and you can make sure she is someone you trust to be with your during labor. It is my opinion that after you have been through labor once, you are more prepared to do it alone after that.

I recommend midwife assisted because I would not choose an unassisted home waterbirth for myself. I've had one by accident, but would not seek to repeat it as I enjoy the care of my midwife.

Th

LaLa April 12th, 2007 09:33 PM

I would suggest an assisted, but Im really leaning towards jhmomofmany's answer/suggestion.

Well educated, prepared & willing/ready to take responsibility - sure go unassisted if you cant find a MW who is in line with your beliefs, desires, etc.

I think its well worth the effort with a first baby. BUT, not b/c I dont think women are capable, ONLY b/c I think our culture has preprogrammed women in a way that is counterproductive to positive natural births. I KNOW women can do it - its UNprogramming that crap from their brain first, which for some women it takes a good guided birth by a caring MW to do first ;)

Lala...

Isaeph April 12th, 2007 09:38 PM

I had an unassisted birth with dd and I would do it again in a heartbeat. Dh isn't too thrilled with that idea though. :lol: I would have done UC with ds if I had been more educated. I think if you REALLY take the time to get as thoroughly educated as possible, and get your dh as educated as you can (mine hates talking about "girl parts"), I think you could do it.

abigailsilva April 13th, 2007 06:31 AM

I also think that you can absolutely do it, no matter which way you choose. If you can find a wonderful midwife then go with that, if you can't go it alone babe, we'll be here to support you! Personally after having my first MW assisted home birth, the reason I would have her there again, is that I didn't have to think. Neither did DH, after 28 hours, i was SPENT. When I wanted to go to the bedroom and my MW literally had to haul my limp body in there, she knew to get me some grape juice and make me drink it, I was so much better after that, and yes, my DH could have been "trained" to anticipate that and deal with it, he didn't have to, he could just hold me and stay with me. There are a million other little things she did that made it easier and smoother and I really appreciated her presence. Also, while I chose to be alone for much of my labor, I liked knowing that there were at least two women in the next room who were calm and totally confident in my ability to do this. So for ME, with a MW like mine, I wouldn't do it any other way, but if I couldn't have her? I'd prob go it alone.

Frelle April 13th, 2007 11:25 AM

we are really spoiled, arent we, Abbey? (She and I have the same midwife)

Joni927 April 13th, 2007 08:31 PM

Thanks everyone! I think I will interview some MWs and see if I can find one that fits your descriptions. If so, great, and if not, I'll be on here with lots of questions! :smile:

MrsPil April 13th, 2007 10:52 PM

I'm a crazy woman so I had to go UC - I loved every second of mine. Granted I had a homebirth midwife as a plan B and the hospital as plan C but I really felt that at home by my little lonesome is where I ought to be.

That said, it really depends on you. If your gut feeling is that you cannot do this with anyone around you then yes, UC is for you. But if you think even for a second that you need a "professional" there for support then I would suggest preparing for that route simply because you can always not call if you change your mind.

For me the plan was not to call, the only reason I would have called my MW was for breech and I knew that she was head down. Educate yourself and let your spirit lead you - you'll find what you need.


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