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-   -   Home birth...Hubby not onboard (http://www.justmommies.com/forums/f341-home-birth/655694-home-birth-hubby-not-onboard.html)

Alison88 July 20th, 2007 04:34 AM

Hi Everyone,

Dh and I are ttc #2 and are going to be using the same midwives we did for dd. With dd I went to the hospital because of pressure from my Mom, who was not even sure about be using a midwife at first (she warmed up to it after she met her). The reason that I am considering a homebirth this time is because I found going to the hospital for dd completely pointless. I wandered up and down the halls, sat in the bath for a bit and then had my dd naturally and was home less than 4 hours later. I could have done all of that at home and avoided the car ride. The problem that I am facing now it that dh is not really on board after all of the blood and stuff and I am trying to convince him that it would be ok. The hospital is only 10 min away so it is not like it would be a long trip if we did have to go.

Any suggestions on what I can say to him? I know I have lots of time to try and bring him onboard, but he is slow to change his mind so I need all the time I can get lol.

Thanks!!!
Alison

CharmieCM July 20th, 2007 08:14 AM

Is he worried about the mess (you mentioned "all the blood and stuff") or is he worried that it won't be safe for you to have a homebirth? I think your argument that the hospital felt like a complete waste is a good one. Also, the hospital likely slowed your labor down some, as any change of setting generally slows labor down.

If its the mess he's worried about, there's not much reason to worry...the birth kit for homebirth has pads to contain any mess and every midwife I've ever met leaves the house as clean as they found it (or cleaner). Bot my apprentice and I have been on hands and knees cleaning carpets after a birth, but we've never had anyone complain about the mess...most of the time its clean before mom or dad even knows there was a mess!

Alison88 July 20th, 2007 09:25 AM

Quote:

Is he worried about the mess (you mentioned "all the blood and stuff") or is he worried that it won't be safe for you to have a homebirth? I think your argument that the hospital felt like a complete waste is a good one. Also, the hospital likely slowed your labor down some, as any change of setting generally slows labor down.

If its the mess he's worried about, there's not much reason to worry...the birth kit for homebirth has pads to contain any mess and every midwife I've ever met leaves the house as clean as they found it (or cleaner). Bot my apprentice and I have been on hands and knees cleaning carpets after a birth, but we've never had anyone complain about the mess...most of the time its clean before mom or dad even knows there was a mess![/b]

Thanks so much... I will be sure to mention that to him. And I agree with the slowing down thing... I was progressing well then went to the hospital at about 9:30 pm and things slowed down until I finally delivered at 3:35am. I was home by 7:30am and enjoye being in my bed much more than at the hospital. My Mom will not have a say this time.. Although I know she meant well, I am going to stick to my guns this time as long as hubby and I are on the same page.

I wish I had know about midwives when I was going to school because I may have chosen a different career path. I think the work you all do is amazing and I would never have a baby any other way (provided I had that choice)

Thanks again!
Alison


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