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tela November 1st, 2012 07:42 AM

1st pregnancy after a loss
 
i know there are a few of us here who are pregnant after a loss. how are you coping? does it feel real? when will you breathe a sigh of relief? when will you tell people about the pregnancy?

my D&E was in march of this year. i thought i would be super nervous, but i feel soooo pregnant that i'm already feeling confident about this pregnancy (hello m/s!). i don't know that i'll feel ready to tell people until 13 weeks since we had already told family about our last pregnancy that ended at 10 weeks. we did tell the grandparents and my BFF immediately, like always. i would tell them regardless of the outcome since they were the ones who helped me cope last time.

The Lesha November 1st, 2012 08:23 AM

Re: 1st pregnancy after a loss
 
I have had such an expirence but I wanted to send you so much sticky dust and ts & ps for this wonderful blessing! welcome to the board!

*Kiliki* November 1st, 2012 08:26 AM

Re: 1st pregnancy after a loss
 
i had a loss before Helena around 9 weeks....i don't think i breathed the entire pregnancy specially since i started bleeding/spotting at week 6 with her....sooo scary!!


H&H 9 months to you and loads of sticky dust!!!!

Mandamail88 November 1st, 2012 08:27 AM

Re: 1st pregnancy after a loss
 
Me too - no experience in it for me but I feel for you and am so happy you feel confident :) I am extremely nervous myself, but I think thats probably kind of normal.

Tons of :dust: your way :)

Krisnina November 1st, 2012 12:44 PM

Re: 1st pregnancy after a loss
 
My d&c was last April on our actual wedding anniversary :( so far I have been a total mess. I'm hoping this bean sticks and I make it past my loss point, and then maybe I will start enjoying this pregnancy.

Kiam November 1st, 2012 02:28 PM

Re: 1st pregnancy after a loss
 
I had two chemicals early this year.

I don't know when I will not be paranoid, I guess time will tell.

BeachMum November 1st, 2012 02:30 PM

Re: 1st pregnancy after a loss
 
I've had 3 losses, 2 of which I got pregnant shortly after with 2 of my kids on earth. It's hard, you never stop worrying, but after my 3rd loss, I told myself I would enjoy the pregnancy, no matter how long it lasted. You just have to believe it's going to stick this time and not fear, I know it's easier said than done, but keep trying. {HUGS}

stephc71885 November 1st, 2012 02:33 PM

Re: 1st pregnancy after a loss
 
this is my second pregnancy.. first one ended in a loss at 9 weeks back in april. i am a nervous wreck inside but trying to play it cool outside! last time i still felt VERY pregnant (my hormone levels were over 100,000 when I MC'd) so i am very nervous and reading into every little sign this time!!!!!!! i'm trying to just be peaceful and enjoy this, but it is certainly a tad nervewracking. I told my mom and my coworker and so far that's it! i'm hoping to keep it quiet until i've had a couple of doc appts.

pearlica November 1st, 2012 06:25 PM

Re: 1st pregnancy after a loss
 
I'm a wreck. With my loss I had m/s every morning, strong symptoms not a sign anything was going wrong till we went in for an u/s. This time around I have no nausea what so ever and I have no faith in my body of knowing whats right or wrong since I was so blindsided last time. I will feel a bit better if I see a heartbeat at 8 weeks and then will relax a little bit once we make it 12 weeks. Then I start to get really anxious near the end again.

Krisnina November 1st, 2012 06:43 PM

Re: 1st pregnancy after a loss
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by answeredprayer (Post 26721604)
I've had 3 losses, 2 of which I got pregnant shortly after with 2 of my kids on earth. It's hard, you never stop worrying, but after my 3rd loss, I told myself I would enjoy the pregnancy, no matter how long it lasted. You just have to believe it's going to stick this time and not fear, I know it's easier said than done, but keep trying. {HUGS}

You're so right. I really should start enjoying every moment of this little bean no matter how long it lasts. What great advice. I mean don't they deserve the love and happiness not the panic :)

JandJC November 1st, 2012 08:22 PM

Re: 1st pregnancy after a loss
 
I've had two losses. One chemical and one d&c in April. It was devastating, and each bfn before I got pregnant again was just as tough. When I got my bfp I tried to take it one day at a time. I celebrated little milestones. Lines getting darker on tests, betas doubling. I tried to find the positive in my edd and all the reasons this time was different. (We got preg the first month after buying our new house, that HAS to be a sign, lol).

As the days and weeks pass, it gets eaiser. Ultimately it's out of your control and it took me so long to accept that. I'm almost 14 weeks and still haven't announced publicly because the Mc jaded me like that. It DOES get better through. Thinking of you & sending sticky dust your way!

LilSunshine November 2nd, 2012 05:33 PM

Re: 1st pregnancy after a loss
 
We've had 2 losses (one at 6 weeks and one at 11 weeks) so I'm feeling pretty anxious. Every little ache or twinge makes me nervous. :( We've also been ttc for about 3 years, so I'm praying that this little one sticks.

little.lili November 4th, 2012 07:44 AM

Re: 1st pregnancy after a loss
 
**lurking, I'm doing the 2ww**

My first pregnancy ended in miscarriage at 11weeks and I found myself pregnant again only 2 months later.

It was really hard to enjoy my daughter's pregnancy, even if everything went flawlessly well. Once she was moving it was much easier to not feel scared/anxious, but that didn't happen up until 20ish weeks... It's a long wait, but after that things seemed more real and safe.

I waited until 9 weeks to start telling people... Including family... I needed some private time to digest my feelings a little.


I hope you start feeling better soon. It's really hard enjoying a pregnancy after loss. :hugs

triciadawn0814 November 4th, 2012 11:17 AM

Re: 1st pregnancy after a loss
 
My m/c happened August 31 at 8 weeks, I'm now due July 8, so almost 5 weeks along. I think I will feel a little better once I get past the 8 week mark and a lot better after I hear a heartbeat. This definitely doesn't seem as real or as exciting as the first time. I was so optimistic and really didn't think I would have a M/C and when I did it kind of threw me for a loop. Got pregnant after one cycle and hopefully this time around will be better! I'm not really having any symptoms yet except being tired.... Every time I feel any sort of cramp/twinge/gas pain I get all worried that I'm miscarrying again. I'm sure I'll regret this down the road but I'm kind of wanting some morning sickness just so I know that I'm still pregnant! My parents/siblings already know but we plan to tell my husband's parents in a couple of weeks and everybody else around Christmas. Can't wait!

ninja_mommy November 4th, 2012 01:50 PM

Re: 1st pregnancy after a loss
 
I've had two losses, one a year ago around 7 1/2 weeks and the last being in July I had a D&C. That loss was so much more different. I think I will feel a lot better after hearing a heartbeat. Today is the day I got my bfp and I am nervous now. Not panicking too much yet. I will feel better if my lines get darker quicker than the last two times.


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