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sfarrow3 July 30th, 2012 07:47 AM

Age of Marriage
 
Do you think you married at the "correct" age for yourself? Looking back- do you wish you had done it younger? Older? Waited longer? Or- was your age perfect for you?

shockandawe July 30th, 2012 07:53 AM

Re: Age of Marriage
 
That's a tough one because it's different for everyone.

Obviously I married the right guy and this was when the universe brought us together so it must have been right.

BUT I can tell you I wish we'd met each other and done this like 10 years earlier. Mostly because I think I was ready that much earlier, but meeting at the age we did has made for other significant challenges in our lives that may have otherwise been avoided. I'm thinking infertility and balance of responsibility and all that other parenting jazz.

Of course everything is a trade off, and if we had started 10 years earlier, we wouldn't have all that we have financially either.

inyourhonor July 30th, 2012 08:45 AM

Re: Age of Marriage
 
I really don't know. I was 19 when I got married, my husband was 24

Blue-Jay July 30th, 2012 09:12 AM

Re: Age of Marriage
 
I think we found each other at the exact right moment in each of our lives; 5 years earlier, and neither of us would have been the same person we were when we met and it probably wouldn't have worked out. But like Becky said, I kind of wish we had been at the exact right moment in our lives about 10 years earlier, lol. I am happy with my DH, but I wish we could've had a little more time together before we started having kids, and I wish we were younger so we could be more flexible with each other and our expectations.

CameronsMommy July 30th, 2012 11:13 AM

Re: Age of Marriage
 
I think for us it was perfect timing. People thought that we would divorce a year or so after we married because we were so young (I just turned 18 and he was 19). At times I wish we would have waited a few more years but in all, we did what worked for us.

childofmusic July 30th, 2012 11:37 AM

Re: Age of Marriage
 
I'm very glad I didn't get married when I was younger. Just like I'm glad I didn't have children earlier. My early 20s (I'll be 29 when we get married), I was kind of wild, and selfish. And I loved it.

Now I'm much more ready to be a wife and mother, and to settle down. I actually still feel like I'm getting married young, I always figured I'd be in my 30s if I ever got around to it at all.

Jessimaaka July 30th, 2012 01:05 PM

Re: Age of Marriage
 
We've been together since I was 18 and he was 19. We didn't get married until we were 26. I wish we had been able to do it sooner, but I was in post secondary education and then he was very sick and took over a year and a half off work waiting for surgery and then the economy went bad and he couldn't go back to his job. Once we were stable again we got married, but I wish we could have done it a few years earlier. Oh well! We're still going strong so it really doesn't matter.

i:heart:you July 30th, 2012 01:53 PM

Re: Age of Marriage
 
I got married at 23 and dh was 27, I think it was the right time for us.

Doralovinmomma July 30th, 2012 03:13 PM

Re: Age of Marriage
 
i think it was perfect. we did meet earlier in our lives and it didnt work out so clearly we needed to have some time and then come back together

Frozenoj July 30th, 2012 04:13 PM

Re: Age of Marriage
 
I was 21 when we got married, so it couldn't have been much earlier. I would have been okay with getting married a year or two younger if I had met him a year or two earlier than I did, but it's not a big deal either way. I'm definitely glad we didn't wait longer as I've cherished every moment of being his wife.

Amaranth Dhanya July 30th, 2012 04:22 PM

Re: Age of Marriage
 
Found the right guy when I was just about 30. Wish Id have met him a few years earlier and he wishes the same about meeting me(he was nearly 40 when we met).

But life is life and we met when time was right and thats what matters in the end.

MellieB July 30th, 2012 05:56 PM

Re: Age of Marriage
 
For us it was perfect. We were young by most people's standards but for us it was perfect. We've been married 6.5 years now so I think we're going ok.

Lorena26 July 30th, 2012 07:30 PM

Re: Age of Marriage
 
I was pretty close, i thought i'd be married by 25 and i was 26 when we got married so it seemed to work out well enough timing wise. I was 23 when we met and still had grad-school ahead of me...we married before i graduated but it worked out well anyway.

Keakie July 31st, 2012 05:59 AM

Re: Age of Marriage
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by shockandawe (Post 26335177)
That's a tough one because it's different for everyone.

Obviously I married the right guy and this was when the universe brought us together so it must have been right.

BUT I can tell you I wish we'd met each other and done this like 10 years earlier. Mostly because I think I was ready that much earlier, but meeting at the age we did has made for other significant challenges in our lives that may have otherwise been avoided. I'm thinking infertility and balance of responsibility and all that other parenting jazz.

Of course everything is a trade off, and if we had started 10 years earlier, we wouldn't have all that we have financially either.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue-Jay (Post 26335570)
I think we found each other at the exact right moment in each of our lives; 5 years earlier, and neither of us would have been the same person we were when we met and it probably wouldn't have worked out. But like Becky said, I kind of wish we had been at the exact right moment in our lives about 10 years earlier, lol. I am happy with my DH, but I wish we could've had a little more time together before we started having kids, and I wish we were younger so we could be more flexible with each other and our expectations.

I agree with both of these. :) We wish we could have met 10-15 years earlier than we did (except, you know, that I would only age backwards a couple of years :giggle: for those who don't know, there are 13 years between my dh and I). We also know that we were different people when we were younger and we may not have been ready for each other.

As it stands, we married last year when I was 22. Being married young works for me. :)

sfarrow3 July 31st, 2012 06:30 AM

Re: Age of Marriage
 
I think we married at the perfect time for the both of us. We were married when I was 23 and he had just turned 24.

*Kiliki* July 31st, 2012 06:34 AM

Re: Age of Marriage
 
while i think i totally married the right person....i think we could hve waited a bit longer....to really get to know each other...cause really we didnt have much me and him time before we had kids....he was in the military so always working and i was pregnant 3 months into the relationship...so yeah...we really didnt KNOW each other til years later and things started spiraling downhill...and i think if we waited and took the time to really get to know each other we might have avoided that downward spiral...but who knows!?! it all seemed to work out in the end anyways LOL

shockandawe July 31st, 2012 06:54 AM

Re: Age of Marriage
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by *Kiliki* (Post 26339915)
while i think i totally married the right person....i think we could hve waited a bit longer....to really get to know each other...cause really we didnt have much me and him time before we had kids....he was in the military so always working and i was pregnant 3 months into the relationship...so yeah...we really didnt KNOW each other til years later and things started spiraling downhill...and i think if we waited and took the time to really get to know each other we might have avoided that downward spiral...but who knows!?! it all seemed to work out in the end anyways LOL

That's the key right? What I've learned about being married I think is that life will throw you every curve ball it's got in it's pocket. Marriage is about choosing it every day and making it work. Not letting it work for you - so no matter when you choose to do it, or when happened to meet, you have to roll with the punches to work it all out if it's what you both want.

purlyrocker July 31st, 2012 09:19 AM

Re: Age of Marriage
 
I feel like I got married a lot younger then I ever thought I would, if I even ever bothered to get married. But it just worked out so perfectly. I wouldn't have wanted to be younger. I knew DW when I was younger, but we weren't together then. I kind of feel, we weren't ready to be together. It's always felt like to me we were each other's prize. Like we watched each other go through bad relationships, break-ups, and then for getting through all that, the universe went "Ok, now you two get to have each other. And from here on out, you'll be happy together".

#5in2005 July 31st, 2012 05:28 PM

Re: Age of Marriage
 
I got married at 19, dh was 22. And although I think I was plenty young, I'm happy we got married young, I have no regrets 16 years later.

lilymagic August 1st, 2012 01:37 PM

Re: Age of Marriage
 
I just wanted to be done with school before I got married, and I was! So it worked for me!

I'm actually glad DH and I didn't get married any earlier. If we had, we might not have the girls, or not all of them at least. As hard as it is to be a step-mom, I love my girls and couldn't imagine me and DH together without all four of them. Plus there's an 11 year difference, so, ya know, felony and all that jazz.


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