my baby. my loss.
I don't know if I should start with the back story. But I'd rather not. If anyone wants to know though, please feel free to ask.
I got my natural miscarriage. My plan was give it til end of this week, and if not by Friday, I'd take the Misoprostol.I was all set for my guy to stay with me.
It all started around 6 am, with cramps. They would start, ease up, then start again. I was tired so I kinda ignored them and rested. But then I Had to use the bathroom, and that's when it somewhat started. It really got going around 9.
Had a gush of blood. Totally soaked pad and pants and underwear.
Went into bathroom. Minutes later if not seconds, passed a clot, and then next my baby. I am grateful came out intact.
Then there was constant bleeding. Clots coming out.
Thought it was pretty much finished. But, no such luck. Around 9:30 laid down, and when I got up, another gush. Filled the pad and once again also went through to pants and underwear. Had to wear them to er.
I was going to bring the tissue to my clinic, but that second gush made it not an option.
I called my guy to let him know I was going jn. He said to call him back with where I'd be.
Then called 911 and said I needed to go in. Explained what all happened.
Called my guy back to tell him what hospital.
Got an iv put in in the ambulance, and was given oxygen.
Cause of all the blood loss my blood pressure became low.
Before I decided I had to go in, I also was weak. That was another big factor in my decision to go in.
When I got there, I had bp cuff put on, and also clamp thing on my finger.
They gave me warm blankets cause the iv drip causes chills.
I had blood drawn. Was asked basic health questions. Any allergies. Hospital stays. Things like that.
It was the placenta that was the problem. It was being stubborn and wouldn't come out completely. That last time I was in my bathroom, I saw it. Only a part of it would come out, and then just sit there. When I relaxed most went back in. I managed to get only a smaller portion of it to break off the whole thing.
When I was in the er everything left was removed. Scraped out, I think. I was told the rest would have to be suctioned, but that turned out not to be necessary.
After that the bleeding lessened quite a bit.
After a bit I was given the ok to go home.
After I got off the bus from the hospital, at the transit center... I was walking to a nearby McDonald's to get something to eat, and on the way there felt a good bit of blood.
When I got to McDonald's I went into the bathroom and found the pad they had given me soaked through and once again underwear and pants got blood on them too.
I called the er to see if I should go back in. It worried me a bit, you see.
I didn't have any dizziness or weakness or anything though, like I did in the morning.
I was told to just wait a bit and see if it continues. The bleeding did, but not heavy again, luckily.
Though once I got home, finally, after being at Walgreens waiting to get prescription filled for iron pills, only to be they don't have them there, passed a smallish clot.
But bleeding seems pretty much at normal levels now.
I'm feeling ok now. I'm really glad he stayed in the er with me for the amount of time he was able to. And I didn't even ask him. He just automatically wanted to be there.
After the baby came out, and after I thought it was ok to stand, I did take a picture of my baby. Before that I had just spent a little time just looking. Could see really tiny ribs on one side. The head didn't look as I had expected. Not quite roundish. I can't remember now if I saw the hands or feet, or both. Came out laying on the side. Wasn't able to tell if boy or girl.
I did kinda see the butt. Near the bottom was a longish, for the size of baby, cord looking thing. Maybe it was the umbilical cord?
My baby was so tiny.
I had to leave him or her behind at the er, so tests can be ran to see if a reason or reasons can be at all determined.
Was a little hard to do that. I said my final goodbye, then. Silently.
I forgot about this for a bit. It was raining as I miscarried and when I was on the way to the hospital. It was still raining even when my guy got there. But when we left, and got outside, we saw the sun was out.
I take that as a sign. That it's gloomy now. But that things will brighten up. That there will be a good thing coming.
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