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-   -   Eek what should I say? (http://www.justmommies.com/forums/f1929-november-2013-playroom/2683005-eek-what-should-i-say.html)

Cupcake2 October 2nd, 2013 09:23 AM

Eek what should I say?
 
My appointment with my doctor got moved to tomorrow morning (it was scheduled for Monday) and I am going to ask him to move my due date. I'm really nervous about it because I don't think he will do it. BUT I know it's off and honestly it's causing me a lot of stress and anxiety. I'm just not sure what to say for him to take me seriously? I know a week isn't a big deal to a lot of people but because of my previous births it's a huge deal to me. I do not want to go overdue and there is honestly no reason to. My babies are big enough and they were both early because I was induced. I don't want to be induced this time so it's important my due date is correct. I keep tryng to think of how to word it so he wil understand and it's driving me nuts. I know it's off and I don't feel comfortable with a due date that I think is wrong. My doula who is a midwife told me that if I did a home birth or delivered at her birth inn (it's at a house) she would change my due date but I want a hospital birth. So I'm torn because the whole due date thing has been making me loose sleep! I've tried to ignore it but I just feel further along ugh.

Any advice would be great! And please wish me luck!

HappyBabyB October 2nd, 2013 09:29 AM

Re: Eek what should I say?
 
Tell him exactly what you told us, be honest and express your concerns fully. If he says he doesn't think it's a good idea, tell him you are very serious and would like it moved. Maybe repeating yourself a couple times even if he says no will change his mind? Not sure but its worth a shot if this is something bothering you that much.

~Kris~ October 2nd, 2013 09:38 AM

Re: Eek what should I say?
 
I'm confused, if you don't want to be induced, then why does it matter when the due date is? If you don't want to be induced, then the other option is to just wait for baby to appear, unless you are wanting a c/s?

FairyDustMom October 2nd, 2013 09:40 AM

Re: Eek what should I say?
 
My OB told me she doesn't want me to get near my due date because my body has a hard time pushing out a bigger baby (based on my last pregnancy).
First week of November is the earliest I want to go anyways. That would put me at 39 weeks (due to work). I got a second opinion from another OB and he wants to do a cervix massage from 36 weeks (will be seeing him again next week). I had third OB and she was telling me to wait until due date as every pregnancy and baby is different- so I am also getting different opinions from everyone.
I understand it can be very frustrating.
Dont worry about bringing it up again. Give it another try and tell him as the time in nearing you will not go through labour like you did last time. Will your husband be there with you? Maybe if he is also there and backs you up the doctor will listen to you more.
I am forcing my husband to be there with me for my next appointment as I noticed the OB is very different with him there.
In the meantime, would start the natural methods.. teas, oils, sex, walks to help prep the body for an easier labor.
Try not to worry.. easier said then done.. just firmly tell him how you feel and I hope he will listen to you. I think they tend to listen to the pregnant woman more the closer she is to her due date. Mine is waiting till last minute to make a decision!

xxxxx good luck and hope tomorrow will go well (fingers crossed)

Cupcake2 October 2nd, 2013 09:46 AM

Re: Eek what should I say?
 
It matters because I don't want to go overdue because fear of a c-section. My due date is off by at least a week, it might even be closer to two weeks honestly. So if I'm not induced and go to my current due date I could technically be almost 42 weeks? At least 41. My others were at 39 weeks and they were both very traumatic labors because of their size. I know if he doesn't change my current due date then I will be induced a week before since I think that is actually my due date (or at least closer to it) so I rather have the correct due date and not feel like I have to be induced just to have a birth that isn't horrible. Hope that makes sense. My doctor is great but he's probably won't listen to me go on and on about it. Short and to the point usually works better with him. That's why I'm not sure exactly which words he will take seriously.

~Kris~ October 2nd, 2013 09:50 AM

Re: Eek what should I say?
 
Okay, so you aren't totally against an induction, you just want the induction at the right time for what you think the due date should be.

What if you asked about having an u/s to check growth, that way you'd look like you are open to the idea of waiting, if baby's size isn't an issue according to the u/s.

FairyDustMom October 2nd, 2013 09:50 AM

Re: Eek what should I say?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Cupcake2 (Post 27697569)
It matters because I don't want to go overdue because fear of a c-section. My due date is off by at least a week, it might even be closer to two weeks honestly. So if I'm not induced and go to my current due date I could technically be almost 42 weeks? At least 41. My others were at 39 weeks and they were both very traumatic labors because of their size. I know if he doesn't change my current due date then I will be induced a week before since I think that is actually my due date (or at least closer to it) so I rather have the correct due date and not feel like I have to be induced just to have a birth that isn't horrible. Hope that makes sense. My doctor is great but he's probably won't listen to me go on and on about it. Short and to the point usually works better with him. That's why I'm not sure exactly which words he will take seriously.

Thats exactly what happened to me last time. Went 10 days over as my OB thought the baby could come naturally still.. didnt want to rush into induction.. also no one told me it would be big until I started pushing. After HOURS of pushing they started filling out c section forms but finally got it out with forceps and episiotomy.
What you just stated is perfect to say to you OB. Tell him last time you waited and ended up nearly avoiding a ceserean and this time you are not taking that risk again.

Quote:

Originally Posted by ~Kris~ (Post 27697582)
Okay, so you aren't totally against an induction, you just want the induction at the right time for what you think the due date should be.

What if you asked about having an u/s to check growth, that way you'd look like you are open to the idea of waiting, if baby's size isn't an issue according to the u/s.

Thats a good idea.. :)
Although my OB doesnt want me to get one - he can tell by touching and says my baby is average.
Thats what they told me last time and it was big.
I hope your will listen - maybe it is easier to get Ultra sounds in the US

Cupcake2 October 2nd, 2013 10:29 AM

Re: Eek what should I say?
 
I'm not 100% against an induction, I would take it over a c-section but I really don't want to do either unless it's necessary. I would feel obligated to be induced on the 8th if he keeps my due date the 15th though since I think the 8th is actually my due date. He did a growth scan a couple weeks ago and the baby is measuring over two weeks ahead. He might do another one in a week or two I think. It's just my body is telling me it is off and it's not something I can keep ignoring. Plus since this is my third baby I feel like I know something just isn't right. I'm sure I sound ridiculous and I'm almost positive he won't change :( I'm trying not stress about it but I've never felt this way with my other pregnancies!

shana1979 October 2nd, 2013 11:48 AM

Re: Eek what should I say?
 
Short and to the point: I know my date of conception. All ultrasounds agree with that same date. I want it moved up so I can avoid going over and having the same problems I've had before.

meritaten October 2nd, 2013 12:03 PM

Re: Eek what should I say?
 
Just say to him what you said to us! And then go from there :)

Cupcake2 October 2nd, 2013 12:08 PM

Re: Eek what should I say?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by shana1979 (Post 27697911)
Short and to the point: I know my date of conception. All ultrasounds agree with that same date. I want it moved up so I can avoid going over and having the same problems I've had before.

Thank you! :smile:

But the only thing is all my ultrasounds say a different date lol. . He only cares about the first ultrasound which said the 15th. My second ultrasound said the 8th (which I think is my due date) and my third ultrasound said the 3rd.


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