Hi everyone, unfortunately I have to introduce myself here.
I was a member of the October DDC. I went in for my NT ultrasound on March 26th as soon as the tech put the wand on me I knew something was wrong. She asked me if I was sure my dates were right, then said that she would have to do a vaginal ultrasound. I was 11 weeks at the time so I knew that there should be no reason why she couldn't see what she needed to without using the wand. Then she said that she needed to get the radiologist in so I knew what was coming. The radiologist said that there was no heartbeat and that baby stopped growing at 8 - 9 weeks.
I had a D & C the next day (Wednesday) and we left for holidays to Hawaii on Friday. I think now that we've been home for a week it has finally started to hit me.
I know that it's been a few weeks since my loss but before now I didn't feel like I needed the support, I thought that I was doing good. I've been reading this board since my loss but felt like emotionally I was fine. However this last weekend I was quite down and I couldn't figure out what was wrong with me, until I realized that I was thinking about the baby I lost all day long, I think because we left for holidays so soon after I didn't get a chance to grieve and it is just now hitting me.
I'm sorry for your loss Valley83. I had a similar experience this past weekend. I thought I had been doing better. I was focusing on other important things in my life, I had a really good date on Friday night but then on Sunday I was suddenly hit with profound grief after witnessing a father cooing at this infant daughter. I'm still feeling the sadness.
I'm so sorry honey. I wish there were words to fix it. I remember you from our due date club. It's so sad how many of us there are from Oct.
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