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-   -   a little down tonight (http://www.justmommies.com/forums/f256-recurrent-miscarriage-and-pregnancy-loss/234128-little-down-tonight.html)

srs June 21st, 2006 09:46 PM

I was supposed to have my first appt for bloodwork done tomorrow. What I find depressing is that I can't even make it to the first regualr appts before miscarrying. Both times were in the 6-7 week range, which is way before the doctor even sees you, unless something goes wrong. I hated how both times, well meaning nurses kept saying, "Well, you know, you're still very early in your pregnancy." Actually, given the way my pregnancies turn out, I was about 85% through them by the time I even got to the doctor.This is really just a vent. I wish I were on my way to the doctor's office tomorrow morning, instead of going off to work to pretend like I'm fine all day.

Rina42308 June 21st, 2006 11:23 PM

I hear you sweetie...the nurse who helped with my procedure did the "oh just 7 weeks, you were early"...like that makes it any better to have lost 4 babies in the 6-8 week range...idiot! Anyway I just wanted you to know I understand and I give you cyber hugs through the computer screen right now!

4iris June 22nd, 2006 08:24 AM

You'd think the people in an OB office would be more sensitive. (((Hugs))) and prayers for you today.

Sharon June 22nd, 2006 01:17 PM

Just once, wouldn't it make a difference if an OB nurse put her arm around our shoulder and told that she knew it was early but that she knew it still hurt and she was very sorry. It really would make sense that they, of all people, would understand how hard it is, even early in the pregnancy.

(((HUGS)))

beck12 June 22nd, 2006 06:39 PM

Well said Sharon.

I hate that they jsut don't get it - how can that NOT be some part of training to work in that environment????

I'm also sorry about hte whole U/S thing..too early etc. I have had an U/S - but ONLY in the midst of having an mc - or being told I was going to have one. I wish I could even have jsut experienced a regualr one - one where I actually got good news. :confused: I feel jealous of others that they saw something positive on that screen (I know - it really isn't different) it's just hard that whenever we decide to try again - that u/s machine is like my arch enemy - I don't even want to tthink about having to get up on that stupid table & look at what?? more heartbrake? (sigh - LITERALLY). It is hard. :confused:

calicocat June 22nd, 2006 06:55 PM

The most encouragement I got was from the lady who did the ultrasound for my first miscarriage--she said very matter-of-factly "Oh, I've been there. I've been right where you are." I don't know why that was so comforting--I guess because I was completely devastated by the first loss because it was so completely unexpected, and it helped to know that I wasn't the only person in the world who'd ever lost a baby and continued to live a (somewhat) normal life.

Other than her, I've heard all the "well, you can always try again...at least it happened early instead of later on (that's true, but I've heard it so many times I could scream)...it's just nature's/God's way of weeding out the bad ones..." etc. etc. etc. A little more sympathy would be nice--I would think nurses would be in the "sympathy business," but I guess even they get toughened up over time.

lizard June 22nd, 2006 09:33 PM

I don't understand how they can have no clue what to say to you, either. With my last loss, I went in for bloodwork several times. The girl that was taking blood was in the room with the nurse. She asked me if I had been in the week before. I told her that I had and that when I was in the previous time it was to see if my HCG levels were rising, and that I was in this time to make sure that they were going back down. All I got was silence. For goodness sakes, it was an OB office, and I'm sure that I'm not the only one who has ever had a loss.

Quote:

that u/s machine is like my arch enemy - I don't even want to tthink about having to get up on that stupid table & look at what?? more heartbrake?[/b]
I am totally with you on that one. On the last 4 u/s that I have had, there hasn't even been a baby, just an empty sac. If I get p/g again, I worry that there will once again be no baby. Then I wonder what the chances of having another b/o are. I would think that that would be highly unlikely, but then again, I never thought that I would have 2 m/c either.

4iris June 23rd, 2006 09:27 AM

I used to get excited about the u/s machine, but lately it's only brought bad news. Thankfully when I went for my post-op appointment they thought to put me in one of the few rooms without an u/s machine, which I appreciated.

calicocat June 23rd, 2006 09:09 PM

When I went for my appt. on Tuesday, they put me in a different room too, but then I had to go to the ultrasound room. I wasn't really traumatized by having to go in there, but when I walked in, there on the screen was the previous lady's ultrasound, with a baby head profile and the words "Baby Girl" on the screen. I didn't look again after that, and the lady turned it off, but I almost reached over there and turned off the machine myself because she took so long. Come on people!

4iris June 24th, 2006 08:45 AM

That was really thoughtless of them. They should know better than that.


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