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-   -   Momentos? (http://www.justmommies.com/forums/f256-recurrent-miscarriage-and-pregnancy-loss/235688-momentos.html)

Saigon June 23rd, 2006 06:20 PM

Do you keep momentos of the time you were pregnant? A maternity top, the positive test, ultrasound photos? Anything?

I had things for most of mine but lost everything in a move. Did it hurt to pack away things you had already gotten for the pregnancy/baby?

4iris June 23rd, 2006 07:32 PM

I just got a necklace to wear to remember them by. I also have an u/s from the 2nd one at 4w 3d. The first m/c happened too early to get an u/s. We'd already been stocking the baby stuff in a closet, but now I'm starting to get all the freebies I'd signed up for. The beechnut bib got me kind of teary the other day.

calicocat June 23rd, 2006 08:20 PM

Oh, I almost went to the Enfamil site and signed up! I'm so glad I didn't. But I had bought some diapers, and I got the courage to take some of them back to the store. The others I am going to send to my old college friend who is expecting her first baby in August. It makes me feel better to know that someone I know will be using them.

I have some ultrasound pictures of this most recent baby. The doctor offered me some more pictures after we found out there was no heartbeat-and I was like "No thanks, just keep them in my file." I thought I might want one later but I really don't. I really just wanted to get out of there so I could beat my head against a wall in private for a while.

The only mementos I have of the others are the actual dates, etched in my mental calendar.

StephLS June 24th, 2006 05:54 AM

From my 1st m/c, I had this feeling that it was girl (I didn't know for sure - only made it to 6 1/2 wks). I had wanted to name her Grace. So that was Grace to me.. and the best way I could think of Grace being gone was that my grandfather in heaven now held her for me. My mom made me cry by buying a little Willow tree figurine that has a guy sitting down with a baby on his lap. Mom wrote the following with a black marker underneath "Baby Grace with Papa." Also, on mother's day, the right to life group at my parents' church was selling carnations, my mom bought me one. I have the dried carnation sitting on next to that figurine.

I really don't have anything for this second one.

Sharon June 24th, 2006 09:44 AM

My first pregnancy (Sarah) ended at six weeks so I really had nothing. My second baby (Grace) was lost at 20 weeks and I still have one maternity outfit from then, plus some u/s pictures, but they're packed away with the outfit. My third pregnancy ended at nine weeks and I had no idea I was pregnant, so nothing from that one either.

beck12 June 24th, 2006 11:45 AM

I have my memorial garden & I buried some momentos there...including pg tests. I don't know what we will do if we move. I would be shocked to be working in the yard & did up a pg tests. :o I did remove the plastc out casing on 2 of them - becasue when I took htem they were so light that I wanted a batter look at hte line to be sure. So those are so small they look like a litmus test or something - but he others are full size. I don't plan on really moving anytime soon - and I did put each momento in a baggy - so that if I someday wanted to try & find them - I thought perhaps I could relocate them. I just needed to put it all in one place..little socks, shirts, pg tests, etc..all buried in my side yard. Someday someone may come across them & be very confused...but until then - it helps me feel better & that's all I care for now. I was also able to bury one of hte babies there. I placed her in a hanky from my gram and put here under a plant Dh bought for her. I didn't put her in a baggy because I didn't wan to ever try to relocate her - she is at rest & if we do move - I will take her plant with me for sure.

Nykoal June 26th, 2006 10:25 AM

I never saw my u/s photos so I don't really have any of those kinds of momentos. I ordered a necklace the day of my D&C though and I'm still waiting for it, and I planted a little garden with peony bushes and hydrangeas.

As for the items that I collected or purchases while I was pg I have them in a drawer in the spare room that was suppose to be the nursery. Everytime I receive something in the mail I don't even open it and I put it in the dresser. My mom bought a cute little Precious Moments doll that says the Lord's prayer and I have it in the dresser as well. I can't bring myself to look at anything right now.

With my 1st pg I only knew I was pg for a week so I didn't have time to get anything and nobody knew we were pg, but I did get lover 2 dozen roses from family and friends and I dried them. So that is all I have of my first angel.

Stephanie, your comment about your Grace being with Papa brought tears to my eyes. After my first loss my parents were over and said that Nanny and Papa (my grandparents who passed away) were up in heaven with our baby. After this 2nd loss my dad made a comment about how Nanny & Papa have another baby to love. Since we never had the chance to spend time with the babies the 2 best people were with them right now. My Nanny & Papa loved us so much and it brings me so much comfort to know that they are in a safe place and surrounded by love.

***I'm sitting here at my desk in my office and I'm crying as I write this. It's been the first time I've cried since I was laying on the table in the OR the day of my D&C.

4iris June 26th, 2006 10:36 AM

:dothug: for you Nykoal...

lizard June 26th, 2006 10:52 AM

From my first m/c, I have the u/s and I have a box with a blanket, outfit, hat, and a couple of toys that I had bought. From my second m/c, I have the Christmas outfit that I had bought and the u/s pic.

srs June 26th, 2006 07:34 PM

I don't have too much, because I lost mine so early, and I didn't know about the first one until I was already mcing. From the first one I have a pg test, from the second a picture of the pg test (it was a digital test... won't do that again for a memento, since it doesn't last), and I kept all the doctor appt cards and instructions about checking with my health insurance, etc., about testing. It seems like a pretty boring memento, but it's really all I have from the last one, so I'm hanging on to it. It's proof that I actually was pg, and someone else once cared about it.

Beck... the mental image of someone finding a pg test in their yard was a great one. All we find in our yard are old beer bottles.

StephLS June 27th, 2006 07:27 PM

Quote:

Since we never had the chance to spend time with the babies the 2 best people were with them right now. My Nanny & Papa loved us so much and it brings me so much comfort to know that they are in a safe place and surrounded by love.

***I'm sitting here at my desk in my office and I'm crying as I write this. It's been the first time I've cried since I was laying on the table in the OR the day of my D&C.[/b]
Sorry it made you cry, if it helps any I was tearing up as I typed it. It definitely puts my mind at ease to picture my babies with my grandparents.

Anyways, :dothug: to you! One of these days our grandparents are just going to have to wait to get to hold anymore of our babies! :smile:

68rn June 28th, 2006 09:37 AM

I was in the middle of crocheting a baby blanket for my first child when I lost her. I ended up finishing it, but it has been stored away since then.. While it was comforting to work on, it hurt to look at or hold once it was complete because I just kept thinking that my baby should be all wrapped up in it, not me.

On the other hand, thanks to some suggestions from the women here, I am planning to make 2 stepping stones for the garden.. One for each child I lost. I think it will be easier for me to remember them with something I made in their honor, instead of something that was intended to be for either of them.

Nykoal June 28th, 2006 10:32 AM

I love the idea of the stepping stones. It's so symbolic! I think I'm going to add some to the garden that I planted.

Thanks for the idea.

VegasMom June 28th, 2006 03:39 PM

I have kept a pregnancy journal for each of the last 6 pregnancies (5 were m/c and one live birth) and I have the preg tests for all of them and the u/s pics for 4 of them. I decided to put them all together in a book for my little boy because I want him to know how much we wanted him and how long we waited for him and I think this will be a good way to show him when he gets older. It will show him everything that led up to the miracle we believe him to be.


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