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-   -   srs/sara (http://www.justmommies.com/forums/f256-recurrent-miscarriage-and-pregnancy-loss/239381-srs-sara.html)

beck12 June 28th, 2006 05:20 PM

What happened at your appointment today??????

(I am nosey :D )

:P :blink: :wacko: :o :rolleyes: ;)

srs June 28th, 2006 09:24 PM

Beck,
Thank you for remembering! DH and I went together this afternoon to a perinatal clinic. First a nurse gave us all the usual crap about, "Well, mcs do happen, and there's probably nothing we can tell you". Then we spent an hour (ugh) waiting for the doctor, which I filled by thinking this was probably a total waste of time, given the nurse's attitude and the fact that work has been absolutely insane this week and I really didn't have the time to sit there today (although they can get over it at work). But things got better when the doctor (finally, a doctor!) showed up. We ended up getting bloodwork done for chromosomal testing and I got more taken for whatever else they test for - I think it is diabetes, clotting disorders, and maybe thyroid. I'm thinking it's likely that everything comes back negative, and honestly, I would be thrilled with that. I just don't want to have to get pg again and wonder the whole time if maybe it's just my thyroid and I'm needlessly mcing over and over again when it's treatable. Or wonder if we have a more serious problem that we should know about it if we want to ttc again. At this point, I think I've accepted that mc is a part of life (as much as I hate it when the nurses tell me that), and like someone said a few days ago, I will probably keep trying until we get a "take home baby", as the doctor put it today.

So I'm glad we went, although it was hard emotionally to tell my story again to new people. I really liked the doctor, especially because she seemed all about doing early monitoring, and even though I'm not sure I want an ultrasound at 4wks it's nice to know that we would have the option. The only thing that bothered me about her was when she said, "You're really young, so I wouldn't even worry about this. You have plenty of time to have kids." I thought that was pretty insensitive, because 1) I wanted these babies, or I wouldn't even have been there, and 2) part of why I'm worried is my age (25), because your twenties are supposed to be good years for fertility, so what's wrong with me?

But otherwise, I really liked her, and she really went to bat for us in getting all the testing, and didn't treat us like we were paranoid or tell us to go home and wait for another mc or anything.

I'll let you know when I get the test results back. She said the chromosome one could take a few weeks.

Sara

4iris June 28th, 2006 09:28 PM

Wow, sounds like a great appointment. I hope that all the testing is worthwhile and at least gives you peace of mind.

beck12 July 2nd, 2006 02:56 PM

sara - try real hard not to let the Dr's "insensitivity" get to you. I thin they all do it to some level becasue they think in terms of success not emotion. When I was pg this last time & they told me I would mc, teh Dr actually told me (trying to encourage a D&C) that if I "had the D&C today, I could be back to TTC in 2 weeks". :blink: I wanted to slap him. I didn't want to be TTC - I wanted to be pg - now, and I was....and the concept of having the D&C to TTC sooner was appauling to me. It felt like completely ignoring the fact that I was pg at the moment we are having the conversation...no spotting, no cramping, feeling bloated & nauseated & sore bb's...and here he is already talking about the "next" baby. I am certain he meant no offense - but it was offensive. And he has said a million times how "young" and healthy we are & how we will have a baby if we stick with it - I appreciate his optimism, but there were times it didn't seem to help...and he & his wife I know went through fertility treatments (they are both Dr's & that is why they chose this specialty) - but they never experienced mc - and it is different than infertility. I understand that infertility is it's own suffering, but loosing babies isn't like getting another af when you were hoping for a BFP & I think that unless someone has really been there - they can't understand why we "worry" because it isn't happening to them. Any sane person would have to fight the urge to worry. It is part of how humans operate & although I think worry doesn't help you - it will forever be an obsticle for people like us in future pg's. Heck - women that have no history of problems worry to some degree...why shouldn't we? I think we need to fight those thoughts as much as we can & not give in to the worry - but I can't imagine any woman, much less a woman with a history of loss, goes through any pg without some worries. I am glad they are doing your tests & I hope they find nothing wrong so that you can feel like there is a very good chance the future holds far less heartache than your past has. Of course update us again when you get some results!

Rina42308 July 2nd, 2006 05:36 PM

So gald you foudn a dr. you like and who is working with you...
"take home baby"- I think that's kinda cute...it acknowledges the others were babies too...just heaven bound ones.
The other comment- well like Beck said a lot fo times even good dr's can slip. I bet if you gently told her something if she does that again she'd be quick to correct herself. I've noticed that about people who really care as opposed to those who don't or who would rather be "right" iykwim?
Best wishes with those tests...


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