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-   -   Thoughts about the board (http://www.justmommies.com/forums/f74-trying-to-conceive-medical-assistance/2267752-thoughts-about-board.html)

KMH March 6th, 2011 03:27 PM

Thoughts about the board
 
Several of the ladies who have been around the board for a long time have mentioned that it "isn't the same." I have been thinking the same thing, so I'm glad to know it isn't just me. I guess I'm looking for some input about why things have changed. Is it that we don't have a host anymore? Are the types of people who come here changing? Is this just inevitable, because we have had so many graduates?

Please give me your thoughts, and if you don't want to share them out in the open, PM me. I want to try and make this place like it used to be, but I need your help and ideas to know if it is even possible.

Thanks!

*CAMM* March 6th, 2011 05:23 PM

Re: Thoughts about the board
 
Ive been thinking the same thing.

personally for me.. alot of "familiar faces" are rare in here now. I dont know many of the women posting here anymore and thats so strange for me because at one time I felt incredibly close to this board and the women on it...I almost feel like a stranger or intruder anymore!! the board just feels...empty really.

there seems to be sooo many posters that i honestly cant keep up anyways... sure there are a few names i recognize but for the most part..it seems like there are more newbies than golden oldies LOL

Kobain's Mommy March 6th, 2011 05:27 PM

Re: Thoughts about the board
 
I agree with Christin

LindseyMarie March 6th, 2011 06:40 PM

Re: Thoughts about the board
 
I agree.... I think too it's changed because we have a lot of new people, which happens with any board, but so many of us had been through so much around the same times that we kind of all were closer. I think now that many of us are done (waiting for the next stage of MA, pregnant, with babies) that we aren't really "here" anymore.

hollann1984 March 6th, 2011 07:17 PM

Re: Thoughts about the board
 
I agree with you ladies. Ive been around this board for almost a year now and it does seem different. I have been taking a JM break recently due to stress of ttc but this is still a board i love and would love to see it back like it was.

Tammyms March 6th, 2011 08:03 PM

Re: Thoughts about the board
 
I am here off and on, only because I've been a member of TTC#1 for 2 years now and post more on that board. It's hard to keep up with all the boards I belong to, so I'm def not a familiar face here... but I know with our board, it's mostly the Vets who say the boards have changed, and it's exactly what you ladies have mentioned, a lot of new faces, a lot of grads, and that makes it just not the same as when there were a ton of regulars in this journey together!

Angel_Maker March 7th, 2011 03:06 AM

Re: Thoughts about the board
 
I kinda feel like I'm "not supposed" to post here anymore. Not that anyone has made me feel that way, it's just that I feel like I'm posting "in sea of strangers"....I just wish the grads would still post updates, etc. It's great motivation for those still TTC, and right now I think that's really lacking :(

Also, not having a host SUCKS! :( The board is sooooo slow and it makes me sad! I remember when it moved so fast I couldn't keep up!

Jenn in DC March 7th, 2011 04:18 AM

Re: Thoughts about the board
 
I agree with everything that was said. I miss the way that the board used to be. I still read the board several times a day but don't always reply to every message (sorry :( ).

I think it's great that we have a lot of newbies here - it's important to have new faces on the board. But at the same time, I feel like there are a lot of people just dropping in to ask a question and then they are gone and we don't really get to know them. Perhaps they move on quickly because this board isn't as active as it used to be and because they don't get a warm welcome here (not that we aren't welcoming but more because we just aren't "around" as much). I think that having a host would definitely help with that.

I really love this board and it has become my "home." I would love to help find a way to re-invigorate it.

Fallen2Love March 7th, 2011 04:37 AM

Re: Thoughts about the board
 
I'm a newbie. I try not to just post and run. For me it's hard I don't know where I belong: here, secondary infertility, ttc after loss, other. I can't dedicate myself to post in all, so I thought the best fit was here. Sometimes I just don't feel like I fit the criteria to belong. I feel like it but I feel "different.". I guess what I mean by that it seems like most members are ttc #1 or went through everything for #1 and know the same deal for future dc. I have a dd, had a normal pg and find everyone wondering how did it happen. And we never ttc in a traditional sense (ntnp) and bc of losses we had a fertility work up. Also I feel like the general vibe is people who can't get pregnant for whatever only belong here not those like me who have a LPD and can't sustain a pregnancy. Id post in secondary infertilty- but i am not infertile. I don't want to offend but that's one barrier to me posting. That and being here is just too hard (ie in the 2ww).

*CAMM* March 7th, 2011 05:17 AM

Re: Thoughts about the board
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Fallen2Love (Post 23267392)
I'm a newbie. I try not to just post and run. For me it's hard I don't know where I belong: here, secondary infertility, ttc after loss, other. I can't dedicate myself to post in all, so I thought the best fit was here. Sometimes I just don't feel like I fit the criteria to belong. I feel like it but I feel "different.". I guess what I mean by that it seems like most members are ttc #1 or went through everything for #1 and know the same deal for future dc. I have a dd, had a normal pg and find everyone wondering how did it happen. And we never ttc in a traditional sense (ntnp) and bc of losses we had a fertility work up. Also I feel like the general vibe is people who can't get pregnant for whatever only belong here not those like me who have a LPD and can't sustain a pregnancy. Id post in secondary infertilty- but i am not infertile. I don't want to offend but that's one barrier to me posting. That and being here is just too hard (ie in the 2ww).

Well if the criteria were getting pregnant only by medical assistance I wouldnt be part of the group:smile: Im a "vet" if you want to call me that...3 ivf cycles 5years of ttc before I had my first born..but not ONE of the ivf's got me pregnant. I conceived all 3 of my babies naturally...one before IVF (after 2yrs of ttc) that I lost, and my son and daughter were each conceived after a FAILED ivf...6mths after each one actually. After my first ivf failed i was told by 3 reproductive endocrinologists that i would never have a biological child, that i would never get pregnant on my own again..i was told i had less than 1% of getting pregnant naturally...so i WAS an extreme case of infertility..but now im sure people wonder why im even here( with 3 natural pregnancies)..but i have no where else to go and this has always been my home.

The inability to sustain a pregnancy is infertility and you have a place here with us(if you want it) and no one should wonder why you are here. LPD is not something to sneeze at.

Please dont feel like you cant post.

esparando para bebé March 7th, 2011 05:42 AM

Re: Thoughts about the board
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Angel_Maker (Post 23267208)
I kinda feel like I'm "not supposed" to post here anymore. Not that anyone has made me feel that way, it's just that I feel like I'm posting "in sea of strangers"....I just wish the grads would still post updates, etc. It's great motivation for those still TTC, and right now I think that's really lacking :(

Also, not having a host SUCKS! :( The board is sooooo slow and it makes me sad! I remember when it moved so fast I couldn't keep up!

Aww Brandi! I know I haven't been an extremely active member here, but I hate that you haven't been here is much. I feel so emotionally attached to your story. I remember my mom acting like I was crazy when I called her in tears after you lost Evan. :cry: In my mind, you'll always be welcome here.


Quote:

Originally Posted by *CAMM* (Post 23267617)
Quote:

Originally Posted by Fallen2Love (Post 23267392)
I'm a newbie. I try not to just post and run. For me it's hard I don't know where I belong: here, secondary infertility, ttc after loss, other. I can't dedicate myself to post in all, so I thought the best fit was here. Sometimes I just don't feel like I fit the criteria to belong. I feel like it but I feel "different.". I guess what I mean by that it seems like most members are ttc #1 or went through everything for #1 and know the same deal for future dc. I have a dd, had a normal pg and find everyone wondering how did it happen. And we never ttc in a traditional sense (ntnp) and bc of losses we had a fertility work up. Also I feel like the general vibe is people who can't get pregnant for whatever only belong here not those like me who have a LPD and can't sustain a pregnancy. Id post in secondary infertilty- but i am not infertile. I don't want to offend but that's one barrier to me posting. That and being here is just too hard (ie in the 2ww).

Well if the criteria were getting pregnant only by medical assistance I wouldnt be part of the group:smile: Im a "vet" if you want to call me that...3 ivf cycles 5years of ttc before I had my first born..but not ONE of the ivf's got me pregnant. I conceived all 3 of my babies naturally...one before IVF (after 2yrs of ttc) that I lost, and my son and daughter were each conceived after a FAILED ivf...6mths after each one actually. After my first ivf failed i was told by 3 reproductive endocrinologists that i would never have a biological child, that i would never get pregnant on my own again..i was told i had less than 1% of getting pregnant naturally...so i WAS an extreme case of infertility..but now im sure people wonder why im even here( with 3 natural pregnancies)..but i have no where else to go and this has always been my home.

The inability to sustain a pregnancy is infertility and you have a place here with us(if you want it) and no one should wonder why you are here. LPD is not something to sneeze at.

Please dont feel like you cant post.

I agree with CAMM. While I technically fit into "infertility" now, by your definition I didn't when I first joined. (Though I had already had three losses.) At the time, I also felt weird but Brandi and others welcomed me with open arms.

And CAMM, same as what I said to Brandi, you're a grad regardless of how your babies were conceived and it brings a wave of hope to the board.

Jenn in DC March 7th, 2011 05:59 AM

Re: Thoughts about the board
 
I've never even considered whether or not someone "belonged" on this board. I think that all of us here are struggling or have at some point struggled to either get or remain pg. Even if our situations are different, we all understand how difficult this journey can be. I hope that people won't feel discouraged from taking part in this board because they don't feel that they meet the right "criteria."

-hopeful- March 7th, 2011 06:26 AM

Re: Thoughts about the board
 
i'm a newbie and i don't post all that much except for the IVF thread because that's what we just finished and to be honest i don't know the answers to a lot of the questions the girls ask. i have only been on this board for a few months i used to post on the 6+ months ttc board and if you think this board is dead you should pop your head in over there!! :giggle: i just think that i fit in more over here but agree that i don't know you ladies all that well except for those in the IVF thread. but i really like this board a lot!!! i promise to try to be more active to keep it going!

HopeToBeAMom March 7th, 2011 06:29 AM

Re: Thoughts about the board
 
I know for me personally, this is always the first board I check. I always give advice where I can. I try to post and I am definitley one of the golden oldies since 2005 I think. But, that being said, I sometimes feel like I am not supposed to post pics of my boys b/c I don't want others to feel sad. I feel like I have been overloaded with blessings by having 3 and I feel like it's pushing my fortune in others faces:( I try to keep pics to my PR and Multiples board, but I'd love to post them here, just not sure if I should. Maybe we need more Grad update threads to get the oldies back to posting:smile:

*CAMM* March 7th, 2011 06:37 AM

Re: Thoughts about the board
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by HopeToBeAMom (Post 23268278)
I know for me personally, this is always the first board I check. I always give advice where I can. I try to post and I am definitley one of the golden oldies since 2005 I think. But, that being said, I sometimes feel like I am not supposed to post pics of my boys b/c I don't want others to feel sad. I feel like I have been overloaded with blessings by having 3 and I feel like it's pushing my fortune in others faces:( I try to keep pics to my PR and Multiples board, but I'd love to post them here, just not sure if I should. Maybe we need more Grad update threads to get the oldies back to posting:smile:

im the same way...id love to post pictures of my kiddos..but wasnt sure how it would be viewed... I know that in my lowest point in ttc I was not up for seeing grads post pics of their LO's....but I know that for some it helps them...i personally wasnt one of those (wish i had been) so thats why I hold back.

mom2more March 7th, 2011 07:09 AM

Re: Thoughts about the board
 
This board was a huge help for me during our TTC journey! I do pop on here once in a while and try to post on threads, but it has been slow.

MrsB March 7th, 2011 08:29 AM

Re: Thoughts about the board
 
This was the first group I joined when I found JM, so I do consider it my "home" group I guess, but don't post much anymore. I read it every day, and do sometimes respond to a question I actually know the answer for. But since I only did clomid and then 1 cycle of injections I don't feel I have a lot to give, so I usually just read.

Plus being a grad I feel somewhat like an outsider. I mean we did have a long journey TTC, but I only did one cycle of injections. So I almost feel like I'm "one of those girls" kwim? I do try to post in any of the grad update threads though.

♥Ashley♥ March 7th, 2011 10:53 AM

Re: Thoughts about the board
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by *CAMM* (Post 23264955)
Ive been thinking the same thing.

personally for me.. alot of "familiar faces" are rare in here now. I dont know many of the women posting here anymore and thats so strange for me because at one time I felt incredibly close to this board and the women on it...I almost feel like a stranger or intruder anymore!! the board just feels...empty really.

there seems to be sooo many posters that i honestly cant keep up anyways... sure there are a few names i recognize but for the most part..it seems like there are more newbies than golden oldies LOL

:ditto: Its just so many more people coming in and out, and not having a host to bring it all together (Get to know you threads, Cycle check ins...things like that) I would be willing to apply to be a host, I thought about it, but felt really weird, like I was trying to replace Brandi, Kari, or Lindsey and thats not the case.

ccartanddesign March 7th, 2011 12:24 PM

Re: Thoughts about the board
 
I've been on here for a few months. I try to be an encouragement to others. I've never been pregnant and I realize how hard it is to keep from being discouraged. Sorry if I'm too new. I do like this board and feel that there is a lot of valuable knowledge here to be shared. I hope I can be a contributor.

A180 March 7th, 2011 04:12 PM

Re: Thoughts about the board
 
i too feel very out of place posting here. partly because we aren't currently ttc. and we got our bfp. i dont want to step on toes.. but i lurk all the time


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