So angry at my body
Can someone explain to me the phenomenon that when you're TTC your body does things it's never done before? I have always had super regular cycles - very reliable. Each month I start spotting 2-3 days before AF. The spotting always looks the same and follows the same pattern. But this month my body played a nasty trick on me and started spotting way early, and it looked different. It was very light and tan in color. I even had cramping on my left side only, and I got so excited, thinking maybe it was implantation. I never, ever cramp before CD1, much less on one side only.
But this morning my temp has plummeted and when I got up to pee the spotting had turned redder so I know AF is on the way. I am angry and frustrated and sad. Why do our bodies suddenly decide to switch things up when we're TTC? At a time when we're so vulnerable and hopeful, and looking for any sign that we were successful that month, our bodies can act like mean girls, teasing and taunting, even when they've never done that before. And there's absolutely nothing we can do about it :(
I'm trying to comfort myself with the fact that if I had gotten PG this month, I probably would have missed my best friend's wedding. She just got engaged and is getting married early December several states away. And I'm trying to decide if we should take a break this cycle. I don't really want a Christmas/New Year's baby, as we already have a handful of family birthdays at that time, I don't want to be in the hospital for the holidays, and I'm just feeling stressed and down about TTC in general.
Re: So angry at my body
gosh i am going through the exact same thing!!! my body is making me crazy... i wish it was easier! :(
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