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MelindaLee September 5th, 2007 05:50 PM

Hi all. This is my first post here so I'll introduce myself first. I'm a happily married stay at home mom to three great kiddos, ages 9,5, and 14 mo. We finally decided we were done having kids so my husband got a vasectomy 2 mo. ago. About three weeks ago he lost his job, which obviously sent my world crashing around me. I enrolled my previously homeschooled children in public school, started working as a substitute teacher and ended up drinking more than I'd like to admit after the kids went to bed. Then I discovered I was pregnant. My own fault since we knew he had to have a sperm count done after three months before we were okay to stop my birth control...but the stuff makes me so out of whack, I was thrilled to get off it.
I've researched alcohol and pregnancy on the internet and all I come up with is the major risks involved, and how in the second month of pregnancy (is that 4 wks and on??) babies are extremely susceptible to birth defects...it all makes me want to cry. I don't think I would mind one more baby but I know I wouldn't have the time or energy to deal with a child with severe problems.
Has anyone had a similar situation? Anyone have doctors give good advice about this? Know anyone who's child has fetal alcohol syndrome and know how much/how often they drank?
Anything you've got would be greatly appreciated- I'm really stressing about what decision to make.
TIA
MindyLee

eribabe September 5th, 2007 06:52 PM

Hi! I just found out that I'm pregnant last Sunday. It's still sinking in! I had the same questions about alcohol for my doctor because I am a preschool teacher and must admit I look very forward to getting out of work to happy hour because I desperately need it! In fact that were a couple weeks where I had a couple beers every night. That said, my doctor said it is most likely fine.

I have a degree in Child Development and did an hour long presentation on fetal alcohol syndrome. There are no conclusive studies determining when and how much alcohol causes it. Basically, it has to be a lot of alcohol throughout the pregnancy. I found lots of statistics like it's worse early in the pregnancy, and another study said it's worse in the second trimester when more organs are developing.

PLEASE ANYBODY CORRECT ME IF I"M WRONG!!!

I just think that as long as you eat healthy or a variety of foods at the beginning, don't over do caffeine, medicines, etc. you'll be fine. The rest is up the our genes. Alcohol can take oxygen out of the blood, like caffeine does, which may not be great for the newly developing embryo. But I'm wondering if that's irreversible? What does anyone else think?

I hope you talk to a couple of doctors and get opinions from other mothers before you do anything. I felt and still feel a little unsure as to how many beers I had and I was taking advil and eating crap. We can't be perfect all the time. I hope you'll put your mind at ease soon.

Erika

the_elmel September 6th, 2007 12:54 AM

Welcome to the Unplanned Pregnancy board. Congratulations on your pregnancy!!!

I really do not think you have harmed your baby. Lots of women are pregnant for weeks and drink alcoholic beverages a lot, but don't even know they have a baby growing inside yet. Alcohol can definitely harm a fetus, so make sure not to do it anymore, but really... I think it's okay. My neighbor drank alcohol every night (waitress/bartender) before finding out she was 7 weeks pregnant. Her 2-year-old boy is healthy and she had an amazing pregnancy. Just mention it to your doctor and he/she may want to run some tests. But like I said, it is probably okay!

2Corinthians10:4 September 6th, 2007 05:10 AM

Hi and welcome to the board!! Like lauren said, I dont think you have anything to worry about. I found out I was prego at 5 weeks, by then I had had more than just a few drinks more than just a few times in my pregnancy. So I really dont think there is anything to worry about, just dont do it anymore!

Kalia20 September 6th, 2007 09:50 AM

I found out at 5wks and I only have two drinks in that time period. I think drinking is like anything else, is a risk, but not a gurarentee. I have also heard that having some drinks here and there before its a fetus its ok. Don't quote me on that!!!!!

I know two success stories. A friend of mine was born in '82 and her mother smoked did drugs and drank while pregnant. She is a very smart person, energetic no health problems except for headaches. I know another person whose mother was an alcholic with him in '73. He was born with his blood poisoned with alcohol. He had his blood cleaned at birth, and like her, hes just fine. High IQ, responsible, etc. They were lucky. That will not happen to every baby. And those are mothers who drank throughout. I wouldnt advise anyone to drink and I certainly wouldnt drink just because I know two people that survived it. Luck of the draw I suppose.

swade66 September 6th, 2007 10:39 AM

Welcome and Congrats!

I really think that your baby will be ok.

MelindaLee September 6th, 2007 11:22 AM

Thank you chickies so much for responding to me!! Now maybe I can concentrate on getting excited about this little unplanned one :) I'm thinkin' its a girl.

kwestern September 10th, 2007 06:21 PM

Don't fret on what you can't change. My first DD was unplanned and I got really drunk a few times before I knew. She is perfect in every way and so amazingly smart:) Get excited about this baby he/she is going to be just fine:)

melkissa2004 September 10th, 2007 07:10 PM

Correct me if I am wrong, but I have been told that if the drinking did that much damage, most likely you would have miscarried before you even found out you were pregnant. I was worried about this as well because I was not planning to get pregnant and it was definitely an oops baby. I am due in November but I have had a few sonograms and she is developing perfectly normal and is as healthy as could be. I still worry, but it makes sense what I was told. If the alcohol did that much damage the baby would most likely not have made it this far. Good luck!


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