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-   -   Ok my 17 yo nieces BFF is pregnant and.... (http://www.justmommies.com/forums/f47-venting-room/1688751-ok-my-17-yo-nieces-bff-pregnant-and.html)

Indymommy7 August 30th, 2009 06:25 PM

Ok my 17 yo nieces BFF is pregnant and....
 
I know people make mistakes but I am SO sick and tired of every other day I log onto Facebook, there are IN YOUR FACE pics of her and her pregnant belly and requests from my sis-in-law asking people to send her clothes (I don't ask people to buy for my baby in utero).

I have seen her pregnant belly in string bikinni's, and now, the latest, pics of my neice and another girl on either side of her pregnant belly kissing it!

This is the reason why these teens girls are purposely trying to get pregnant. They act like it's some kind of toy they're getting and once they're born, their novelty wears off, and guess who's stuck flipping the bill for thier children? I am not in any way against assistance for those in need but I do have a prob with teen girls knowingly and willingly getting theirselves put in this situation knowing others will be paying.

I too am pregnant, and it drives me NUTS when my neice comapres our symptoms. I don't feel we are peers.

Am I being too hormonal and maybe a little too mean? I am not quite sure why, but this is just all rubbing me wrong.

Thanks for letting me vent...

puglover August 30th, 2009 11:39 PM

Re: Ok my 17 yo nieces BFF is pregnant and....
 
Nope, I am in the same position right now. I feel alot of the same things you mentioned.

in_mommy August 31st, 2009 06:15 PM

Re: Ok my 17 yo nieces BFF is pregnant and....
 
I dont think your being hormonal at all, I am not pregnant, and I happen to totally agree with you. Well, maybe I am hormonal too, AF is due LOL. Oh well, but I do think that is wrong for them to keep asking for handouts as well. I had family doing the same thing. Sending emails telling me what they still needed as if I was going to give up all my stuff when I was currently due at anytime.

Maitri September 3rd, 2009 01:22 PM

Re: Ok my 17 yo nieces BFF is pregnant and....
 
If the baby is conceived, imho I don't have a problem with the mother celebrating her pregnancy. What's done is done. I wouldn't have a problem with a teen posting pregnancy pictures on her Facebook.

However, asking for handouts is way tacky.

HippieLove September 3rd, 2009 06:22 PM

Re: Ok my 17 yo nieces BFF is pregnant and....
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Maitri (Post 17184245)
If the baby is conceived, imho I don't have a problem with the mother celebrating her pregnancy. What's done is done. I wouldn't have a problem with a teen posting pregnancy pictures on her Facebook.

However, asking for handouts is way tacky.

I agree I'm a teen mum and just because I had my children a little younger then someone like yourself didnt make my pregnancy or children less improtant. But as for the handouts I agree with the above, very tacky. Nobody else has provided for my children but myself and their father. If something was bought for them it was because the person wanted to and it wasn't asked... thats rude...

jtcpb12 September 3rd, 2009 07:23 PM

Re: Ok my 17 yo nieces BFF is pregnant and....
 
i was a 21 yr old when i had my first... I got all i needed from gargage sales... It is very rude to ask for hand outs... This time around since my oldest is 15.. i had friends who are done having kids that offered me there stuff....since i & they knew i had NOTHING for a child :( but even if we got nothing ..there are garage sales... & stores....

Indymommy7 September 4th, 2009 10:45 AM

Re: Ok my 17 yo nieces BFF is pregnant and....
 
I can see your points of view and completely respect them regarding her having the right to celebrate her pregnancy.

I guess my qualm on that one are these points;

I too was a teen mom. I got pregnant because other girls at my school were having babies and I was so envious of them and their babies that I just HAD to have one of my own. But when I had my son (who is now almost 16 and I would not trade for anything:)) it was not all fun and games I learned. I had a very hard time. I did not have the option of living with my parents. My ex husband and I got married cause we HAD to and it made for a very rough life.

Also, there are other teens girls in our family (including my own 14 yo daughter) who might look at it the same way I did and it scares me!

The handout request indeed was revolting IMO. I got what I could afford for all my babies, including said son, and yes, some sent gifts and hand-me-downs, but we did the majority of the buying for all our childrens needs. We never asked for a thing!

HippieLove September 4th, 2009 08:31 PM

Re: Ok my 17 yo nieces BFF is pregnant and....
 
I completely understand where you are coming from and agree 100%. The last thing *I* would ever want is for some young impressionable girl to look at me, think its "cool" and go get pregnant. As much as I love and never regret a thing when it comes to my children it is hard especially financially and I often think how my kids deserve better... That would be the only reason I regret being a teen mum. Thankfully though we managed and do fine but it could easily of gone another way if it hadn't of been for my partner, friends and family.

Marlz. September 10th, 2009 12:22 AM

Re: Ok my 17 yo nieces BFF is pregnant and....
 
Well I was a teen mum. If my family offered to buy something for bub I was happy by it. But i didn't go around asking for things.
Its all fun and games until the baby comes out.. then the hard work begins.
I dont get the hole posing thing with your friends kissing your belly in a bikini.. thats not my style. Maybe dh or my kids I'd be fine with. After I had my dd most of my so called friend disappeared anyway..

Im glad she happy and enjoying her pregnancy.. I just dont agree when its a game. There is some teen mums that are wonderful mothers and then theres others that arent.. I guess that can come with any age though.

mom2more September 10th, 2009 11:58 AM

Re: Ok my 17 yo nieces BFF is pregnant and....
 
I too was a teen mom. After I got over the initial shock of being pregnant I celebrated my pregnancy and was very hurt when people made rude comments to me about how I should "be ashamed" or I was a "baby having a baby". I felt so much older than I was I guess. I did not look at my baby as a toy. And I really think I have turned out to be a wonderful mother to my child who is now 11.

But then I do know that there are some people, like the girl your describing wh do act immaturely about pregnancy. And I am currently trying to get pregnant and have fertility issues and it kills me when I see this. I have a young family member who is pregnant and was upset because she found out that after her baby is born she can not drink or smoke weed if she plans on breastfeeding!! I really wanted to smack her and ask her what the heck she is thinking.


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