The Family Feud: When you are ready to start a family and he is not - Page 2

The battle of “the why's”.

 

If you have had a discussion with your partner about having children you have most likely encountered the battle of “the whys”. You say, “Why don’t you want to have a child?” He says, “Why should we have a child?” Invariably, you will not be able to come up with a valid reason why he should have a child and he will be able to come up with many reasons why he should not. This strategy generally doesn’t work. Having children is not a simple decision based on logic and reasoning, but rather, a choice that is made from the heart and soul. It is hard to logically sway someone into having feelings they don’t have.

Not trying, not preventing.

Some couples find the not trying but not preventing method is a fair compromise. If your partner is not ready to “try” to have a baby he may be open to the idea of not trying but not preventing. Make sure that you communicate this with your partner first. He may feel less anxiety if he does not feel that he is obligated to commit to trying to conceive. Many couples choose to casually try to conceive rather than actively try to get pregnant.

Focus on your relationship first.

The baby battle can put tremendous strain on a relationship. Constant fighting is never good for a relationship. Obsessing over this or trying to force your partner to change his feelings is not only ineffective but it may damage your relationship. If you find that you are constantly fighting about this, take a break. Try focusing on the positives of your relationship. Work on strengthening your friendship and communication. Put the subject on the back burner for a while.

Talk to a counselor or minister.

If having a child is causing a marital crisis, consider talking to a counselor. Counseling can help couples work through difficult issues. It is not a cure all and it may not make your partner change his mind, but it is a good place to talk things out.

3.964285
Average: 4 (28 votes)
 

13 comments

By Charly93 on 11/27/16 at 2:35 am

True this do happe. Meanwhile, you want a baby name, check out this ...

By John Jacob on 08/02/16 at 11:39 pm

Best guide http://tinyurl.com/goq2lo2 to get pregnant naturally, I used this  ...

By Mary Masillal on 07/31/16 at 11:30 am

This Online guide http://tinyurl.com/zv6drkx helps me to pregnant naturally   ...

Today on JustMommies

Top 10 Recipe Apps for the Working Mom

After rushing from office to home, it’s tough to whip up easy yet delicious dishes most nights. But with the help of some highly rated recipe apps at your fingertips, you can do it—in a snap!

How to Deal with Super Tantrums

You are out and about with your child running errands, when all of a sudden he goes from happy and calm to full on hell-raiser.

Gender Identity: Raising a Transgender Youth

According to a report by the BBC, "the number of children aged 10 and under who have been referred [for] support services to help deal with transgender feelings has more than quadrupled in the last six years."

When Parents Aren't on the Same Page

Think back to the time before you became a parent: Maybe you talked with your partner about having children. Yet, your “parenting styles” may not have entered the conversation.

From The Message Boards

Trying to Conceive

hey all

I see some faces back after having babies! congrats momma's. It has been a coons age since I last...

Surrogate Mommies

cancer and infertility

My husband and I have been always dreaming about children. But unfortunately I was diagnosed with ca...

Am I Pregnant

Need help

Hi, I am 25 and I believe I am pregnant. I have "women's intuition" if you will, my nana has been as...

Am I Pregnant

3 days late! Super stressed! :( help

Hello! I'am 24 and my period is 3 days late. The last normal period i had was 01/27/2017. And my per...

Trying to Conceive

Ttc #2

My husband finally agreed to try for another baby. Yippee!! I had been on birth control since I had...