Two week wait – a reoccurring nightmare

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before. Wah! I’m in the two week wait! And, as always, IT SUCKS.

The games that my body plays with me during these 14 days are insane. Is that a twinge in my abdomen? Am I constipated or cramping? Back ache! Is that from yesterdays hike, or is it a ‘sign’? I’m thirsty, so very thirsty. Surely a symptom? And the peeing! I’m getting very well acquainted with my bathroom (and our badly done grout….but that’s another post). Although I was well on the path to insanity before now, these two weeks are like the autobahn to Crazy City.

There are days, such as this entire Easter weekend, where I become convinced that I am indeed pregnant. Moments when it is painfully obvious to me that this is IT. That I had better be careful, don’t work too hard, in order to do what I can to avoid another miscarriage. I sleep during the mid-afternoon, go to bed early, say no to a glass of wine. I do anything I can think of to give my body the energy and space it needs to make this work.

And then there are moments where I convince myself to be rational. And not to focus on it too much. And just get things done already. Where I sew another curtain, make pumpkin pie tarts, clean out drawers, change summer wardrobes for winter ones, paint mirror frames….anything to keep my mind and body occupied with anything else but symptom spotting.

Today is day 22 of a 27 day cycle. Day 28 might as well be in the next decade it feels that far away. What do you do during this waiting period, this limbo of lunacy? Tell me! Because I don’t think I can hold of the craziness much longer.

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