Numbers, they don’t lie. especially when you’re 35.

I’m going to tell you something that, if you don’t live in New Zealand and are trying to conceive and have been trying for some time, might just make you a little envious and frustrated. Let it be recognized that I am APOLOGIZING IN ADVANCE.

The New Zealand medical system is so forward thinking that it will actually pay for 2 IVF cycles for qualifying patients. Yup, that’s right TWO FREE IVF. Watch the Google search engine pick that one up. I’ll wait for the millions to join us.



Ok, so now that we’re all together, here’s the deal. First, all you kiwis (3..4 of you?) must apologize to everyone else for your good fortune. DO IT. Because this is a big deal. If you’ve been trying to conceive for a while, and it’s not working, and your family doctor has done the tests they feel they should and they are stumped as to why you’re still not knocked up they may well (and you should request if you’re ready) refer you to a specialist. And that specialist might also do tests, and they may start you on Clomid and tell you to ‘give it a go’. And if you’re still not up the duff, maybe a little Clomid, a scan and a bit of IUI*. And then, only then, if you’ve had a couple of goes and it’s still not working and all the planets are aligned and they get the call from the mother ship, you may well be up for your free IVF.

I hope never to get that far.

Having said that, I have spent a fair amount of time on the omnipotent interwebs learning about the menu of options. I’m coming to the end of my rope here. It’s been over 2 years, my 36th birthday is coming up and when we starting this whole thing I was but a wee child at just 33.

The month-by-month suspense of ‘am I? aren’t I?’ is getting old, and far from the excitement of the maybe and closer to wondering if I can do this much longer. Sex should never show up on your weekend to-do list.

Our doctor has already said that she’s willing to refer us on to a specialist. Maybe it’s time. Maybe, after weighing up all the options, after deciding what we want, maybe it’s just time to bring in the experts. Even though, we so wanted to do this on our own. Even though we thought we had done it on our own. That’s hard to let go.

Normally this sort of post, these sort of feelings, would come at the end of a cycle when it’s clear I am not pregnant, again. But here we are, creeping up on day 14 and these thoughts won’t disappear. And as if the thoughts weren’t enough, I came upon this delightful calculator this morning:

Picture 1

I hope your numbers are better than mine.

*Intra-Uterine Insemination = turkey baster approach

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  • Oh good gosh. That just stinks! I am so sorry it’s been so hard… My best friend has been trying for nearly 4 years with only 2 pregnancies, one ectopic and one stillbirth. I tell ya, for all the scare adults put into you as a teenager about how you can get pregnant by just looking at a guy so don’t you dare kiss him … who knew it would be so dang HARD?

  • Great. Thanks for posting the biological clock thing. Now I KNOW there is no hope for me. 🙁 Good luck with everything.