At Least I Don’t Have Hemorrhoids…

I know, I know that is not the most positive way to start out a blog entry…but after getting less than 2 hours collectively of sleep last night I’m grasping for whatever tidbits of positivity I can to make myself feel better. ‘Cause today I’m bloody shot,  as they say. I’ve always prided myself on being someone who not only sees the glass half full, but appreciates that it is glass and not some crappy plastic cup from a bar that’s contaminated with BPA. But it’s taking A LOT to keep my chin up right now.

I have already called my mother crying a) because she gets it and she’s only 1 hour behind me in Texas b) because my husband CJ is 3 hours behind me in California right now and most likely still asleep. But not to worry I’ve got enough tears stored up so I can cry to him later when he’s fully awake and can appreciate my misery without being groggy. (Um, where’s the fun in whining to someone who’s half-asleep?)

I think what annoys me most is that just a few days ago I was bragging to anyone who would listen about great I was doing. I truly was on this incredible feel good streak. I was almost high. I kept thinking, “this pregnancy thing isn’t so bad.” I was taking on the NYC subway stairs like a champ, running around town performing, having brunch and going to weddings just outside of the City in New Jersey with no pain or swollen extremities. Now just 72 hours later that seems like a distant memory. What really doesn’t help is that it’s hot, overcast and there’s about 95% humidity. Hello?! When the heck did NYC become New Orleans?

What really is scaring the hell out of me right now are my friends- and I use that word loosely- who now are like, “Well you think it sucks now, just wait until the 9th month. You’re really going to be miserable.” Well, fan-tas-tic! Thanks ladies!

I guess all I can do is do what I do best, try not to wallow in it, remember that this is a temporary state and that the outcome will be SO worth it, and of course I must find the humor in it! That right there is the key to life, right? And it could be worse, I could have hemorrhoids! But I don’t so I’m going to count my blessings and be grateful that at least I can still sit and poop like a regular person.

*Just an FYI  DO NOT Google hemorrhoid images. It is NOT a pretty picture!

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