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July 10th, 2011, 10:06 PM
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Philly77 Philly77 is offline
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Chicago
Posts: 3,455
First off, big hugs to you b/c I think how you are feeling is no different than most other stay at home moms. This is a hard job, which at times is made even more difficult by our DH/SO's work schedule. I can completely sympathize with you as my hubby leaves at 5am and doesn't walk through the door again until around 7-8pm. I am completely on my own with our two boys all day long and I'm absolutely exhausted by the time DH walks through the door.

I usually have a break down about once every 4 months and get upset over how much he works. We sit down, we talk it out, I tell him how I feel and he tells me how he feels. He reminds me that he hates being away so much, but that he HAS to work the hours he does in order to allow me to stay home (I'm a teacher and will go back once my youngest is in school). We get all of our frustration out and things get back to normal. It's the nature of the beast and I just have to remind myself that I made the choice to stay home and that it's not going to be this way forever. We recently moved out of Chicago (where I was completely isolated and had no one around to talk to), and have moved back to my DH's hometown. This has helped a lot as I've made some friends and we do play dates on a regular basis. Also, my oldest started preschool this year and having to get him to and from school forces me to get out of the house more which is good.

I think your hubby sounds like he has good intentions and the good thing is that he's not out running around with his friends and goofing off, he's back in school to better your family. It's going to be a long road, but you will see a payoff in the end. I'd say talk to him, let him know how you are feeling and try and set up some time, maybe once a week, that you get out on your own. I'm pursuing my Master's as well, so I do know that while the work load is overwhelming, he should be able to give you some time for yourself at least once a week. It's just a thought.

Hang in there, you are not alone. I have days that I tell myself that I'm crazy for ever wanting to quit work and stay home. However, the thought of actually going back to work right now and leaving my 2 and 4 year old is more than I can bear. No way could I do it!

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