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January 28th, 2013, 07:25 PM
DownNotOut DownNotOut is offline
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: St Louis, MO
Posts: 493
Hi Brooke - thanks for responding. I'm sorry you're going through the ups and downs and uncertainties as well. I really agree in nurture vs. nature, but I'm not sure there's really anything you can say to help someone else come to terms with it. I guess I'd just be worried that I'd push and then my DH would end up resenting me or regretting the decision. Do you think he'd be willing to go to counseling to work through it? May help to talk to someone else, someone who's knowledgeable about these things, knows the right questions to ask to get him thinking, etc.

We've gotten a few second opinions in the last week and have decided to go with a different RE than I had initially thought we would. The new RE would like to go ahead with an IVF cycle in February (which was our initial plan, but then the donor sperm thing through us for a loop!) He doesn't think we will need to use donor sperm. He thinks he can find enough viable sperm and can do an on-site sperm aspiration if needed. I know we won't know until it's game day, but I feel better about trying it this way first.

My husband is very sure he wants to use his brother's sperm if it comes down to that and I think I'm ok with that. We've spent a lot of time talking it through and I know if it comes to that the RE will require that we all (brother, soon to be sister-in-law and DH and I) will be required to do counseling first, which I think is wonderful - and I'm glad I don't have to be the one that pushes it!

So, my stim should start last the first full week of February and we'll see what happens. I'm trying to stay cautiously optimistic, but I'm also very nervous about the road blocks that may come and the medications!

It's quite the roller-coaster!

Good luck with all of it and feel free to message me anytime as well.
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