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April 11th, 2013, 11:35 AM
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smsturner smsturner is offline
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Upstate, NY
Posts: 3,884
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My family has had the weirdest reactions to my recent pregnancy and miscarriage.

Tom's family has always been amazing and they were super excited about the pregnancy, jumping and squealing and just really thrilled. Then after the loss they were all disappointed and sent love and hugs.

MY family though.
My mother said congratulations most calmly. That was all. (when I was pregnant)
My sister said. Well. that's nice. Why didn't you even tell me you were trying?? And then she was really mad at me to find I'd been trying for years and hadnt talked about it with her at all.

Then after my miscarriage, I told them both and my sister said something along the lines of 'oh that's too bad'. My mom actually said 'well, that happenned to me, and that's why you shouldn't tell anyone you're pregnant until four months'. (I understand that line of thought, but did she really want me not to tell her??)
They knew I was having surgery. Neither of them checked on me, called me, and neither of them has talked to me since (about 3 weeks now). Usually, we are close, and get in touch 2 or 3 times a week. They got together and had easter dinner without inviting us or even mentioning it.

I'm totally upset and confused about their reaction. Is this normal? Why are they avoiding me?

Why would my sister care if she knew we were infertile?

Do you guys have troubles with your family about infertility and loss if you've had one?
Susan, dh Tom, dd Megan (15), ds Marcus (13), Our together miracle, baby Dean, 17 months

Crazy enough to try all over again for a second together baby! Hoping for a much less wild ride this time!

TTC with PCOS for 5 very long years. Annovulatory cycles. Multiple doctors. Different meds. One horrible loss. And then one wonderful success, born 2/18/14.

I never knew until that moment how badly it could hurt to lose something you never really had. - Missed Miscarriage at 10 weeks - 3/26/13
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