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August 25th, 2013, 12:22 PM
ducksaresnazzy's Avatar
ducksaresnazzy ducksaresnazzy is offline
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: new york
Posts: 2,479
my boyfriend and i dated for two years before i got pregnant. he's a huge gamer also, and hangs out with his friends all the time to lan and drink. it was a problem for us, so i ended things, but we got back together. a month later i was expecting. his gaming habits haven't stopped but he's taken steps to prove to me that he is going to be more attentive and available.

this boy of yours has done nothing. i would stop trying to contact him. i would tell him about big milestones, like the gender or anything going wrong, but other than that, forget him. he's a sperm donor, not a father. if he wants to step up later and be the man he should be now, that's a different story. but right now, you need to surround yourself with positivity. yes, it'll be hard. but this isn't just for you: if he's in and out of your life, he will most likely never be a stable fixture in your child's life either. if he does want to see the baby, offer to meet him at a neutral location so the three of you- you, him, baby- can do something. explain to him you don't trust him, and that to get visits alone, he has to earn your trust. he doesn't sound like the type who'd go to court to win visitation, but i do agree with documenting the mother's actions in case she pulls something like that.

as for the get a job/ lose weight comments, WHO does he think he is? that's appalling. as if dealing with scummy exes and trying to be a decent single mother isn't going to be hard enough, he also expects you to keep in shape because he said so? i could almost see him asking that if you dating, but demanding while he's dating someone else? i have no advice here, just shock.

if you ever need anyone to vent to, i'm also a young mother dealing with a huge gamer of a baby daddy. i hope your situation improves; it will get better.
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