Topic: Support
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September 30th, 2013, 09:02 PM
shen7 shen7 is offline
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 6,057
I would tell the breastfeeding mom, basically, I hear you. It is tough. I would maybe make sure she knows about LLL and kellymom and whatever, but not be pushy about it, mainly just be a sounding board. Or I guess I act sort of like a therapist. "How did that make you feel?" Lol. I used to be really about solving people's problems and I got some grief for that, people do mostly want sympathy and if they want problem solving they generally ask for it specifically, so now I try to be more of a sounding board and half *** therapist for friends IRL.

You absolutely have to not enable the cousin. I am so remorseless about being harsh with stuff like that. I am just not the person to go to if you want to come to with your sob story. I don't know. Someone like that I would think of as lost already, unless by some miracle they save themself, but really, not my problem. I don't dehumanize them, I will talk to them about where they are at, but any material assistance whatsoever is a no. I had a good friend and roommate once who got into poker and cocaine and I would let her eat my groceries but I never gave her even a $5 bill. Even if she said she was just getting some groceries or something. I would buy the groceries. She did clean up eventually. It is hard to watch someone destroy their life but also amazing that sometimes those people can turn it around. You can't help them keep their shady game going though. You have to just erase yourself from their calculations of how they will keep the game going.

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