Topic: Support
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October 2nd, 2013, 12:43 PM
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alittlelost alittlelost is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2012
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Also, I do get emotional, too, sometimes, but what happens is I see that I'm getting worked up, and I calm myself down and then try to reapproach with reasoning and fairness. I guess the problem is at that point other people might not be in the mood to calm down or be fair themselves. That's when the really frustrating things happen toward me: name calling (which I never participate in), cursing (which is not my style), hypocrisy, lying, manipulation, etc. Again, I can't change them. I can only change myself. By time it gets to that point I just cut those people from my life and move on, because it's not worth my energy, but I think the ideal for me would be to grow to avoid those situations without feeling like I can't speak up about things or feelings like my kindnesses will be thrown in my face or that any good I have ever done will be ignored. It's hard when you spend so much time trying to help others and someone loses their cool and undermines all the good you have done. My mom (who has bi-polar) did this a lot growing up. You know, if you don't clean your room one day, then: you NEVER clean your room. If you don't back up something she says: You're ALWAYS siding against me. Things like that. So, I grew up with it and STILL don't know how to deal with it when people get like that. By contrast, I'm the opposite--I'm always the first to apologize and to admit *my* part in a disagreement. I feel that being that way often backfires on me, though. I always forgive the other person, even if they never apologize, but like I said, I really need a better solution.
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