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November 17th, 2013, 11:35 PM
mamatomany mamatomany is offline
Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 848
I'm so sorry your ex was such an unkind person to you. I'm glad to hear that you and your son are safe and out of the abusive relationship. I want to encourage you, because you sound like a strong person and you've already raised a son for a number of years on your own, and that's impressive.

This little son or daughter, as unexpected as he or she is, does not have to alter your decision about your ex. I do not think you should contact him or l him have contact with you, even more so now that you are pregnant. Abusive men do not magically stop being abusive when pregnancy is involved. Whether you decide to raise this little baby as you did your son or give him or her up for adoption, you absolutely should not have your ex as part of your life for your and your children's protection.

All the ladies here will tell you that you should never consider abortion when you are unsure. Since you know you don't want to end this little life, know that you can do this alone. Also remember that while right now you may not be in a wonderful relationship, you don't know when that will happen. If you want to raise this baby, go for it. A great guy might turn up before he or she is even born. Or, as Terre mentioned, open adoption may be a good route.

For now, take a deep breath. You have a good long time before baby is born. You don't have to make all the decisions right now. Enjoy your little secret, enjoy freedom from your abusive relationship, relish carrying a new life inside you. Surround yourself with supportive friends, join a due date club on just mommies to connect with other moms due when you are. Most of all, prayers and best wishes. Keep us posted!
Brooke, happy mama to one girl (9), and four boys (7, 5, 3, and 2) and a surprise post-vasectomy miracle baby born February 7.
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