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January 24th, 2007, 11:28 AM
Kimbo Kimbo is offline
Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: British Columbia
Posts: 720
I just gotta say, I planned on completely natural... of course since it was to be at home. I remember drawing on my strength at home and coping / moving through the intensity just fine. When I transferred it was to get an epi to help my body completely relax and help to turn my babe in the right direction. When I arrived in the hospital I was 5cms dilated and with an intense urge to push. I spent an agonizing 2hrs breathing through the urge and trying to focus before the epi could be administered. I waited for desparately for the epi. I thought it was going to be the miracle I needed... not to get through the pain... but to make the urge to push go away. Once it was administered, it was bliss for a very short time after which it turned into torture. I felt like a lead elephant - I couldn't walk, I couldn't move, I couldn't even roll over. I spent the night lying on my side in the most uncomfortable positions trying to relax with nurses running ice cubes up and down my arms and legs all night. I kept thinking to myself "why in their right minds would anyone ever ASK for this torture?"

As LaLa mentioned, I think fear is a huge part of it. Fear that the pain will be too much, fear that you won't be able to cope. It isn't surprising considering that fear is built into just about every stage of the process from a medical perspective - fear that the fetus won't survive, fear that there will be some deformity, fear that the pregnancy won't be healthy, fear that the birth won't go well. At every stage of the process women have to face this fear, I think it is little wonder that at the end women fear the pain as if they fear what their own bodies are capable of.

<div align="center">Mommy's little angel is Karolyn Amelia. Born June 8, 2006.</div>
<div align="center">Breastfed with love.</div>
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