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September 27th, 2005, 09:10 AM
babies babies is offline
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 3,598
also another poster said it seems like she and hubby fight more when 'his' kids come over...what changes when teh kids come over? What are the children doing to incite these fights?

I don't know....I always thought that if you marry a man with children then they are YOUR children too. What kind of family has that kind of division..I don't think divided famalies last very long...

I think alot of it may be resentment, are some of you angry that DH's have had children from other relationships?

How do you resent a child? I guess I just don't understand, DF does not have any children, but he raises DD like she were his own, in the early stages it has been rocky, DD wanted her bio dad and I to be a family but that definately was not happenng, she went through thinking she did not have to obey DF and they just had to spedn time together and work it out. She is 6 and as any honest parent will tell you, even your OWN kids can get on your last nerves, its par for the course..

what I worry is that these 'step-kids' that are so unlikes will be pushed aside when the new baby comes and you think you have trouble now...try handeling a child who feels his parents favor a sibling over them....I don't blame any child for acting out if a step mom or dad maybe not openly but obviouslyand even subliminaly (sp?) favors a 'biological' child. When you have a blende family, the family is fusing, coming together as 1, I would NOT be marrying or involved with ANY man who disliked my child. DF was and is patient and loving and treats her like she were his and DD and I both appreciate it. At 6 DD can be a HANDFULL believe that but she knows her mom and future step dad love her to pieces.

Maybe the step kids are reacting to the vibes they get from you...if you can feel someone resents you, how quick and ready will you be to accept and behave for them?? Even adults react when they can sense someone does not like or resents them...can't blame a kid for that at all.....

Good luck and I hope the relationships with the step children improve and grow into happier relationships