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November 13th, 2007, 08:10 AM
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Doodle Doodle is offline
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Orlando-ish Florida
Posts: 10,919
All last week I dreamed about miscarrying at my daughters birthday party. Thankfully the party happened with nary a bad sign. I felt good and sure and happy again for about 3.5 seconds then fear started gripping me again. I feel like I am fighting a cold, no big deal but then today I woke up extremely crampy.

I am right in the midst of my panic zone. Lost first baby at 8 weeks and second babies at 6 weeks. I am in week seven right now. I just havent had a good feeling about this for a few weeks and that scares me. With my last pregnancy I couldnt keep it under wraps, this time I have told a few people but not many at all. I feel like I have just been stuck waiting for the other shoe to drop. I keep thinking- I've been lucky three times so far, can I be lucky again- especially since this was a complete and utter shock and surprise of a pregnancy? Do i deserve this baby since I hadnt planned on him/her so soon?

It's not helping that my pregnancy symptoms arent as strong. I have to wonder if that is due to the HUGE dietary changes I made during my last pregnancy when I found out that i have a gluten intolerance.

My husband keeps asking me to give this up to God, to let this burden of worry be lifted from my shoulders. I just dont know how to do that..
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Erin, Mama to 6 little birds

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