Topic: I feel guilty
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February 12th, 2008, 02:32 AM
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Brittanie Brittanie is offline
just me
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Littleton, CO
Posts: 43,573
I wanted Erin to be a girl so bad (got my wish!). I just knew it would be SO MUCH harder for me to box up all of Cora's clothes and put them away without using them. After we lost Cora, I pretty much left all the little clothes in the dresser where they were.

So, yes, I understand your want to have a boy, since that's what you were expecting and hoping for.

And since when is having a baby selfish? I know it feels that way, but think about it: it's the most UNselfish thing you will ever do.

And I think you are right, you will from now on worry about whether or not wanting to TTC is a subconscious desire to replace him. I've been feeling like it's time for us to have another, and I still worry if wanting to replace Cora is the reason behind it.

That desire to have a baby is not WRONG. I hope you and DH can figure something out that you both agree on, and that you get your boy when the time comes.
Thanks to babydoll213 for the siggy! My kids' blog Cora's blog

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