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-   -   Eating habbit difficulties.....:( (https://www.justmommies.com/forums/f65-blended-families/1184034-eating-habbit-difficulties.html)

Ellemphriem August 8th, 2008 06:31 AM

Well it is an experience if anything but that. It is already a week in to having her for the month and it's ok. I had the impression that i wouldn't be able to pull it through mainly because of my pregnancy and all the issues that this brings into someone's life. I cannot even balance myself. Much less balance everything else. But she is not a depended child thank God. She does most of the things herself so the situation doesn't tire me a lot. My husband is bringing most of the balance by always pointing out to her to let me rest. The only major difficulty is her eating. She does not eat....almost anything. She eats a few things she likes and is not prepared to try anything else. She is so thin :( But i cannot cook everyday 3 dinners a day so i can catch her liking something :( Even one dinner is too much for me at times. So she ends up eating delivery food more often than i would like her. Also i cannot cook everyday the same things because she doesn't try anything else. I need proper nutrition....and so is hubby. Don't know what else to do....i try....but it is natural i think. She is used to her own mom's - grandmother's kitchen and children are sensitive to foreign tastes of other houses. I just hope the baby that is to come won't be this difficult. I hope she will get used to my cooking from now...;) and then it will be easier on later. The funny thing is that all of our friends and relatives think i am quite a cook. But as i said that doesn't matter. I child is always more used to it's own house. She will remain with us one more week, then 10 days to her grandparents at the sea and then another 5 with us. I know that her granmother will stuff her up.....LOL....and she will gain somehow, but i fear she will go away from us lighter than she came......moufff....i don't like that but have no idea what else to do. My hubby is very supportive. He told me to cook what pleases me (due to pregnancy) and that she will eat one way or the other. In the end ? I think we will order out again for her. I don't like that, and i don't like the idea of going back and saying she always ate out or too little :(

Any suggestions ladies???

PS: She is not demanding at all special foods just for her.....but she is just so thin it is sad i seem to cannot do anything better for her :(


Blondzilla August 8th, 2008 07:46 AM

We have a standing rule at our house. If you don't like what is made for dinner, you go hungry! Children will not starve themselves and if you keep giving into her "desires" for takeout, she will continue to eat nothing but that. Keep some fresh fruits on hand and things like peanut butter and jelly for lunch...she'll survive. You should be getting your energy back at this point in your pregnancy. If you're not, talk to your doctor. Millions of women work full time throughout their pregnancy and still maintain a household and care for their other children so unless you have other medical issues, you should be more energetic than you sound. Exersize is good for you and the baby and it will make your labor go a lot easier if you keep in shape so maybe you and your DSD could take a short walk in the afternoons which would also speed up her appetite and thus kill two birds with one stone. If she's sitting around all day, she isn't burning up whatever calories she's taking in and she probably won't get hungry. Keep her busy and she'll get hungry. That's the time you might want to try introducing her to new foods. Especially if she sees you and her dad eating them. Don't let her have snacks right before dinner or lunch. Limit snacks to healthy foods and not cookies or any other type of calorie laden, nutrition free snacks. It will also help if she can help with preparing meals. Children are a lot more likely to eat things that they help prepare. She can make the salad at dinner. Have her tear up the lettuce and place the tomato slices around the bowl. Let her get creative and make "faces" in the salad with tomato and cucumber slices and raisins and egg slices...whatever you can think of to put in a salad. Curly ribbons of carrots make pretty "hair". Make it fun for her and she'll be more likely to participate.
Hope this helps!

My2miracles August 8th, 2008 08:14 AM

I take a completely different approach. Totally because I was that terribly fussy, painfully thin eater as a child.

Lucy (she's 6) is also very, very thin. She eats a limited variety of food - her eating habits are getting better & she's gained some weight over the summer but it's a slow process. She just turned 6 & is only 40lbs.

On the good side, she is extremely healthy. She is a ball of energy & very, very smart. I will not be surprised if she tests out as gifted in some classes in school this year.

So being painfully thin has not endangered her at all.

We almost always provide her with something else to eat for dinner. Nothing huge but a PB&J or something. We encourage her to try things but don't force.

JustBecca August 8th, 2008 08:37 AM

First of all I would stop the take out. That is giving her control and she is the child. In my house you have a choice to eat dinner that is made or you can try it and if you really do not like it you can make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. You can also ask her what she likes that is cooked by you or your DH. See if there is anything that you can cook that she will eat. My children are also very thin and small. Sadie is 9 and 42lbs, Lilly is 7 and 41lbs and Gabe is 3 and 30lbs. The girls are both short and Gabe is tall. My children are very active and have to go outside and play. They do not get TV during the school year unless there is a friday night movie and popcorn that they have earned through out the week. Summer is a little different with the TV they watch in the morning and that is it. Sometimes during Gabes nap time but not often. They burn a lot of calories and snack 2 times a day. It is 1030 here which is snack time and they are having a peice of peanut butter toast because that is what they wanted.

mariahinkona August 8th, 2008 09:10 AM

First off, congrats to your man for helping his DD realize you need rest! Because when I was pregnant with the twins, I still had to cater to my 8 year old DSD and take care of my baby who was around 8 months at this paticular time. She will not starve herself and since she is independent you can easily have sandwich makings for her. Make the dinner, let her know what you're having. If it is something like spaghetti and she doesn't like the veggies you put in the sauce, take out some sauce for her before you add the veggies. Maybe have her help rinse or wash the pot her sauce goes into.

I was that picky eater and my parents did that a lot, they'd just take out some food and set it aside before adding the stuff I didn't like, or there was sandwiches or sometimes chicken nuggets. You can also get her chicken nuggets she can microwave, but just one box for the week, she can decide when to eat them and when they're gone it's sandwiches.

Take out is nice, for a treat. You can use her fondness for it as a tool to get her to try new things. Just a couple bites, if she doesn't like it that's okay. And then on Friday she gets a happy meal for trying a couple bites of each dinner for the week. Though I'll tell you, for me being picky was all about the smell as well as the taste of the food. If it smelled too strong, like a lot of veggies do, then it would turn my stomach before I even would get it in my mouth.

Try to have meat and cheese as well as peanut butter and jelly. Have fruit on hand too. And sneak in some V8 juice into whatever red sauces you can, my dad used to do that with the spicy kind with tomato paste for spaghetti sauce and I only found out when I caught him. Or tomato sauce in with taco meat, makes it saucy and adds a little veggie. Just don't let her catch you!

It sounds like her and her dad are workable and willing to work with you. My situation is totally the opposite, we wait on DSD like she is the queen, and since she is the guest of honor she gets whatever she wants. I've gotten her to the point of asking me before she grabs her sweets and sodas, and make sure there's sugar free Kool Aid to drink. But sometimes she will just run in and grab something or beg for subway, and I correct her. But that all changes when DH gets home, then it's candy and gum and soda constantly, I mean she always has something sweet in her mouth all evening and gets so wild. She does eat what I make though, so there is that.

How old is she again? Maybe she can make something she likes, like good old kid friendly hamburger helper with some very minimal help from you. She can also bake chicken in two smaller and lighter pans, if she's old enough. She can measure out rice, or water and potato flakes for mashed potatos. See what she can do, and have her make a couple dinners. Just be sure to have a salad, or veggies for you and DH! You can sit in a kitchen chair with your feet up and supervise easily enough. And now's the time to teach her if she's old enough and is capable enough, because it'll be a help once the baby comes and once baby comes you'll be hard pressed to find the time to teach her then.

GinaOfAllTrades August 12th, 2008 08:28 PM

My son Alex is/was like that. Before I came around it was fish sticks and chicken nuggets ALL the time. Once Jason and I moved in together and we bought our house it changed. We all started eating dinner together and it was the same thing. In our household you either eat what is fixed or you go hungry. He would fuss and cry for hours at first to try to get up but neither DH nor I would budge. He doesn't fuss as much anymore. He tries occasionally but will stop after the 3rd time or so now.

Me personally, I would not cater to her on meal times. And I certainly wouldn't order take out for her if no one else is eating it too. I wish you the best of luck.

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