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Jessimaaka August 2nd, 2013 06:30 AM

Midwife vs OB
What did you use for each of your kids?

I want a vbac. I can't imagine recovering from a c-section and having Cam to care for as well as a newborn. I think my best shot is with a midwife, but I don't think I'm interested in going natural (ie I looooved my epi), and the ones around here prefer your plan to be to go natural.

So what was your experience? What would you pick if you had to make a decision for your next one right now?

mccaroline August 2nd, 2013 06:57 AM

Re: Midwife vs OB
I've done it three different ways. I have found it all depends on the personality of the person you get, not what they are.

DD1 - delivering GP - OK experience, she over reacted about a few things and pushed me into some treatments I didn't want and didn't really need, spent 4 months on bed rest but that had nothing to do with her, she was nice enough to set up a home nurse for me instead of making me stay in the hospital. Ended in a non emergency but not planned section.

DD2 - midwife - terrible experience, she wouldn't tell me what was going on, sent me to an OB at the hospital without telling me why and then told the OB that it was a transfer of care and told me it was just a consult. Called me in for and cancelled appointments at her will, usually the day of, causing me to miss a lot of work. I actually kicked her out of the delivery room with the help of a couple of nurses who agreed that she was not being helpful and asked for the on call OB to come in and take over. Ended in an emergency section because she wasn't paying attention to what I was telling her and by the time the OB got the transfer of care paperwork and got to me we had lost DD2's heartbeat twice and I was in the process of rupturing from my previous section.

DS - OB - fantastic experience, she was young and very relaxed. She put me at ease the very first time we met her. I went into emerg one night because I just didn't feel right and she called me the next day when she found out just to make sure I was alright. She gave me her home number and pager number at the end when I was really quite sick and when I didn't call her, she called me. I'd have her again in a heartbeat. Ended with a planned section mainly because she didn't want me to repeat my experience with DD2. She's also the one who discovered that my pelvic bone is deformed and no matter what I did I wasn't going to have a baby vaginally, it's not possible without breaking that bone.

Jessimaaka August 2nd, 2013 08:29 AM

Re: Midwife vs OB
Wow that's crazy Caroline! I'm glad everything was ok in the end. And I agree it depends if you mesh with them.

I have contacted the 3 midwives in the area to set up appointments with them, and then I just found out the OB I used last time is taking a lot of time off for chemo treatments :( I was hoping to meet with her to discuss vbac but since she told me I have a 13% chance of a vbac (at my 6 week appt), I'm not sure she's even a viable option as she will be taking time off. And I don't know any other OBs that I would request a referral to. I'm so conflicted!

mccaroline August 2nd, 2013 08:33 AM

Re: Midwife vs OB
That's too bad about your OB. I hope you are able to get in with one of the midwives and you mesh well with them. It makes all the difference if you like and trust the person you get.

Irish_Wristwatch August 2nd, 2013 11:05 AM

Re: Midwife vs OB
Ross - my first, i saw an OB, he was actually really great, super nice guy. I did end up having to be induced, Ross had low fluid at 38+6. I didnt like being induced but having a mw wouldnt have changed that. I also hated my hospital experience.

Will and Finn - I saw a MW both time and had them both at home, it was amazing.

If you do go with a MW they wont guilt trip you or anything if you decide you want the epidural, so thats whats stopping you dont worry about

Jessimaaka August 2nd, 2013 05:27 PM

Re: Midwife vs OB
I didn't know that at all Bree! That's crazy! I'm too scared to do it at home, but with the midwives in the area, they say about 75% give birth at the hospital and 25% at home.

Irish_Wristwatch August 2nd, 2013 06:35 PM

Re: Midwife vs OB
ya i think many people choose the MW in the hospital, its a nice compromise for lots of women. I loved my home births though, I wont give birth in a hospital again unless its 100% medically necessary.

Its just so nice and peaceful to be comfortable in my own home and then snuggle up in my own bed and really rest. I know i didnt sleep at all in the hospital with Ross, the nurses annoyed the heck out of me and the food sucked too, I was only there for like 21-22 hours after R was born and i couldnt get out of there fast enough

side note though, i have super quick labours, 6 hours, 3 hours 2.5 hours. I had an epi with Ross after about 3-3.5 hours of labour and i have to say it was the bomb :P seriously awesome! (shhh dont tell the other hippy moms i said that) 3 hours of contractions is about my limit

Jessimaaka August 2nd, 2013 08:49 PM

Re: Midwife vs OB
If Cam hadn't been sunny side up, I think he could have been out in 6-7 hours. Instead, they made me wait like an hour and a half after I was at a 10 to push to try and get him to descend on his own more....and then pushed for almost 2.5....and then c-section. For a total of 10 hours from beginning to end.

I looooved my epi and I want another! I also had only back labour. And since I've had a section, I want the medical backup nice and close just in case since I'm a bit higher risk. The hospital is like 10 minutes from me but I still want to be there. With a midwife, they discharge you from the hospital usually within 2 hours of the birth providing there are no issues. That is also awesome for me, I don't want to be away from Cam for long.

mccaroline August 3rd, 2013 07:20 AM

Re: Midwife vs OB
LOL! I always laugh at that. I know that some moms really are able to handle their newborn and their toddler and all the daily household chores just hours after giving birth, but seriously I loved my hospital stay. My mom brought the kids from home to see me, when I was tired they left, my meals were cooked and brought to me, my room was cleaned and all I had to do was focus on my new baby. I could totally sleep when the baby slept, nurse without being interrupted and relax.

Jessimaaka August 3rd, 2013 09:14 AM

Re: Midwife vs OB
Lol, I never thought of it that way hahaha. My mom lives 2 minutes from me and will be over lots, she cooked and cleaned last time, so I bet she will do it again, or help with Cam or whatever I ask her to do, she is seriously amazing lol.

crunchywannabe August 3rd, 2013 11:33 AM

Re: Midwife vs OB
I had a MW with Arthur. Actually it was a student Midwife who 'caught' him. I can not recommend enough what an amazing, wonderful experience it was!
When I had complications in my pregnancy she sent me to see an OB and I couldn't imagine having seen one my whole pregnancy. The OB took all of 5 minutes to see me and let me ask questions. My midwife appointments were close to an hour each, and we talked about everything from physical symptoms to how I was feeling mentally and emotionally. SHe also was always recommending really great coping strategies and resources during my pregnancy!
Leading up to the birth, she made sure I knew and understood what all the options for medications were, as well as what standard procedure was at the hospital, so I could make informed decisions and opt out of whatever I wanted to.
During the delivery, the MW was so supportive. She really had a hands off, (sit quietly in a corner) approach, but when I needed/wanted the support, she was right there helping me any way I needed.
I did end up using the gas, and it was all I needed, there was no judgement, or hesitation really at all! Our hospital doesn't offer epidurals, but they have had patients transfer to the big city to get one, and she made it known to me that, that was an option should I choose to have one.

Post Partum care was unbeatable! I live an hour from my MW and she still made a homevisit to check in on us! Then we had appointments every 1-2 weeks up until he was 7weeks old! I felt like she was capable, and knew her limits. If something was beyond her capacity she would consult with an OB, but otherwise did an amazing job!

I would be really devastated if I couldn't been seen by a MW for my next pregnancy. In my experience i wouldn't want to try anything else!

mccaroline August 3rd, 2013 11:53 AM

Re: Midwife vs OB
Awe Kalynn, you had the experience with a MW that I wanted. I'm only slightly jealous! Most of my friends had similar experiences to yours. I think I just got a bad MW.

Jessimaaka August 3rd, 2013 12:24 PM

Re: Midwife vs OB
That's similar to the one other person I know that used a midwife. My friend did end up with a c-section (she had 2 previous, and other complications) but she can't recommend enough the level of care from a midwife compared to an OB. I am really leaning to the midwife side.

Jessifer August 3rd, 2013 12:44 PM

Re: Midwife vs OB
Hi there, just popping in from the July 2013 DDC. I'm a FTM and my little one was born 2 weeks ago. I had all of my prenatal care with a midwife but ended up having to consult an OB because I had reached 42 weeks. I had a wide variety of factors to consider but in the end had to choose between an induction which was highly likely to results in a +24hr labour and probable emergency c-section, or just book an elective c-section for that same day. I felt the odds for the induction were stacked against me so I ended up choosing the elective c-section.

Despite all that and the fact that every single aspect of my birth plan got thrown out the window, I would still choose a midwife 100x over. While she gave my OB and I her input on my situation, she never pressured me to go with an induction and was really supportive of the choice that I ultimately made. She was there with me during the c-section and took care of my little one when he was born, stayed with me for a few hours after the surgery to help get the breastfeeding started, she came to check up on me at the hospital, and did the home visits after I was discharged. She was even able to remove my staples at my house so it was a huge relief not to have to drag myself all the way to the hospital or a doctor's office in order to do it (we rely on public transit!).

I'm hoping for VBAC for my next pregnancy and will go with a midwife again.

crunchywannabe August 3rd, 2013 12:45 PM

Re: Midwife vs OB
I think there are good and bad with all care providers! I feel really lucky that everything worked out for me like I wanted, I had a lot of anxiety about our experience, and I really feel like I got the best birth experience I could have had, even if it wasn't exactly the one I had planned!

There is nothing wrong in my opinion, with meeting several different care providers and choosing the best fit for yourself. Also consider hiring a doula. I didn't, because the student really filled that role, until it was time to deliver the baby (at which point there wasn't much anyone could have done for me) I would consider hiring one should I not have a MW attended birth, or possibly if there wasn't a student/extra set of hands to help out!

Irish_Wristwatch August 3rd, 2013 01:53 PM

Re: Midwife vs OB
My MW experiences were similar to kalynns, with the exception that i chose home birth so we had no medical pain management. But both times it was oh so amazing. A Student MW did almost all my care with Finn, she was working under an actual midwife who was always there if we needed her but i really loved our student, we really connected and it was awesome.

sweety_pie August 3rd, 2013 01:57 PM

Re: Midwife vs OB
I had an OB deliver both mine, and will again this time. Small town, no midwives around here! lol

Jessimaaka August 3rd, 2013 03:17 PM

Re: Midwife vs OB
I'm meeting with a doula on the 22nd....we'll see how things go!!!!

Irish_Wristwatch August 3rd, 2013 05:30 PM

Re: Midwife vs OB
ive thought about having a doula many times, hopefully you click with the one you are meeting with. Im not sure what your health plan at work is like but sometimes they cover it, and if you have a flex spending plan you can put it through there

Kalia20 August 13th, 2013 02:57 PM

Re: Midwife vs OB
OB last time MW this time. Planning a home water birth will see how things go. Told her how my OB starting strongly hinting for induction at 37 weeks and more everytime I saw him. Ugh.

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