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-   -   a few issues to work out (https://www.justmommies.com/forums/f44-christian-parenting/2563500-few-issues-to-work-out.html)

beccasmom7718 August 20th, 2012 08:29 AM

a few issues to work out
I havent been on here in FOREVER...i've been struggling with my faith, I think mainly because SO and I arent married...my ex husband hasnt divorced me yet, even though we have been seperated for 6.5yrs. I live in Canada and he lives in NYC.
I feel since SO and I arent married, I am leading a unGodly life and setting a horrible example for my kids..especially DD.
Another reason is that SO isnt really into church or praying etc. He believes and has been baptised but he's fallen along the way. He was raised Luthern and his dad passed away 6yrs ago and thats when he stopped going to church.
Myself i wasnt raised in a church, when I was 14 I started going to a mennonite church and eventually got baptised mennonite.
Because i wasnt raised around church or in church, I struggle with teaching my children about God and going to church. We just moved and havent found a church around us yet. I struggle with teaching my daughter about praying..well all of my kids...and I have been short tempered about silly things.

About a year ago, i felt God say that I should teach my daughter modesty, and since then we have been wearing modest cloths and mostly dresses and skirts...my daughter doesnt mind. It was a huge difference to me, but now it feels normal and I love it..i actually cant stand pants!
i also homeschool because i want my kids to know about God and serve him, but I dont know where to start.
I just feel confused and mind boggled all of the time. help?

CalledBlessed August 20th, 2012 04:50 PM

Re: a few issues to work out
I have a message for you...GOD MEETS YOU RIGHT WERE YOU ARE! You are seeking him and that is wonderful.We are all sinful no matter who you are.What makes us different from the world is we are washed by the blood of Jesus...Don't run from God when a sin or addiction or something you feel is between you and God.Cling to him cause he loves you so much to lay things on your heart.He is your father he will show you how to do things...Just know that God is good..there is nothing we can do to earn our way into heaven only Jesus dying on the Cross....You do what you feel God is calling on your heart.I am so glad you came and hope you stay..

When you homeschool them first start by doing fun things that involve learning.like board games maybe a field trip to help your relationship with your children and let them know that you enjoy it and it isn't stressful.The best way to start teaching them is show them yourself.Show them a lot of love kisses in the morning story telling in the evening.I would start like that it seem like you just need a break.....I know that sometimes a break won't be allowed if not,than just have some fun.

The best way to not feel confused is to go to your bible and find answers to the things that are getting to you tell everything to God and wait for an answer...he loves you so much....If you know the story of the woman at the well ...he came to her. or the man who could not make it into the water that was stired..Jesus came to him...even when he died on the cross he came to us before we were even born...He adores you.............................Hope you are here to stay...love in christ.

Countrymom4 August 20th, 2012 10:13 PM

Re: a few issues to work out
Nellie said it GREAT !!!!

Pray, Pray, Pray, The Lord will give you the anwsers you need. On your own time get to know the Lord he will lead you to teach your children.

aect-mama August 21st, 2012 11:50 AM

Re: a few issues to work out
First of all, welcome back! I hope you'll stay for a while.

I think you've already been given great advice and I would just also want to encourage you to pray. The bible tells us to pray continually.

1 Thessalonians 5:16-17
Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is Godís will for you in Christ Jesus.

The bible also says that whoever seeks the Lord will find Him.

Matthew 7:7-8
ďAsk and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.

Before you read scripture, pray to the Lord and ask Him to come into your heart and reveal Himself to you in what you read. Practice listening for His voice. You may be surprised where you find it.

About homeschooling, are you using a Christian or bible based curriculum? If not, there are a ton of resources out there to suppliment bible lessons. A lot of them are free or very low cost. Pray over your options and let God lead you.

May the Lord bless you and your family. ((HUGS))

mamaginger August 30th, 2012 10:28 AM

Re: a few issues to work out
Hey, I'm actually new to this particular board but I wanted to respond if that's ok.

If you are a Christian then that means you believe in the God of the Bible. That is where you start. You mentioned Lutheran and Mennonite. Religions are man-made. All that matters is God's Word and fellowship with other believers in that word. I honestly believe all the different sects of religion have done more to turn people away from God than turn them TO Him. So don't be concerned with what your particular religion says. Only be concerned with what the Bible says. Baptism is only a symbol of the belief already in your heart so it doesn't "make" you saved or unsaved. I have verses to support this if you want them.

Yes, God's design for us is marriage and I do believe in modesty (though that is how that is defined will vary GREATLY from religion to religion). It is also God's plan for us to be married to another believer. I'm sure you know the verses about being un-equally yoked to an unbeliever. However....none of your sins or mistakes or circumstances are too big to keep you separated from God. You can start TODAY to make choices based on what you know God is calling you to do even if it is hard or complicated. You can only work on yourself and your own relationship with God by reading your Bible and praying. I would suggest reading the gospel John and also Ephesians (if you just don't know where to start). Get a version you can understand. As your life changes (even if not overnight), you will see God's will start to take center stage and your daughter will see the changes and appreciate your honesty with how you turned from your old life to a new life. You don't have to "fix" your life first. That's the Holy Spirit's job. You just come as you ARE.

The Bible says, "There is therefore now NO condemnation for those in Christ Jesus...."

It also says "No one is righteous...No...NOT ONE...." and "our righteousness is like filthy rags"

So even if you "think" you're righteous and doing all the "right" things....being married, being modest, attending church...etc.....we still are NOT righteous outside of the blood of Jesus. We're all filthy sinners. No one here is any better than you. We all needed Jesus to die for our sins. We all need his blood to cover those sins.

"Knock and the door will be opened....seek and you will find..."

mamaginger August 30th, 2012 10:49 AM

Re: a few issues to work out
Oh! Also...I HIGHLY recommend the "Jesus Storybook Bible." It is GREAT for kids to learn about the Bible and it will touch your heart and probably spur you on to read your Bible. Every story points to Jesus and I teared up reading all of them to my son each night. I got it on my Kindle but I've seen it at the major bookstores too. If you weren't raised in church you've got to start as if you were a child yourself. Jesus says for us to have childlike faith anyway. :)

jeweluv August 31st, 2012 07:46 PM

Re: a few issues to work out

I am newly saved but thought maybe I could help a little =))) I recently read, and forgive me bc I can't remember the words exactly, but during Jesus' time there were a bunch of men about to condemn and procecute a woman who had committed adultery; which we know is wrong according to the bible. Well, Jesus looked at them and basically said " are you free of sin?" They could not say no, and therefore he looked at the woman and said basically "don't do it again, you are forgiven." and let her go. I think this illustrates that TRULY NOTHING CAN SEND US TO hell or take us from the LORD...not any action/work because all our "works are like filthy rags" even those who think they live a perfect life; really don't because we are born of sin. The only thing we need to do is accept him, have faith in him, and try our best. You may not be married and that "may be against the bible" but everyone does things that are against the bible or GOD'S way because we are human. It seems to me that you are struggling in you heart to forgive yourself when GOD has already forgiven you through CHRIST!! =)) Keep praying and knowing that you can only do what is possible in the moment, and some moments less than others. I struggle with teaching my children too bc dh is Jewish and the rest of my fam is not Christians so I worry about them getting confused, people being mad at me, etc...etc.

Stick around....maybe we can all grow stronger in our faith together!!

Also...my belief, is that an actual church is man made...ti is a symbol and structure for us to worship in but GOD is not materialistic....he wants a relationship with YOU, going to church , though great for fellowship, is a work. There are so many that go to church and sit there out of obligations while some never go and have a stronger/more sincere relationship with GOD.

Bless you....you sound like you are so honest with yourself and that in itself is BEAUTIFUL!!! =))

mamma_anna September 3rd, 2012 01:20 PM

Re: a few issues to work out
Welcome back! :) It's so nice to see you in here again. I hope you'll stick around for a while.

I think you've already got some great advice from the other ladies here so I won't add much to it. I'll just say that we all go through seasons in our faith, whether we're brand new in our relationship with Christ or we've had a relationship with Him forever, where we feel like we're not doing enough or He feels so far away, or we just don't understand. As hard as it is to go through, I believe it can be a good thing.

I believe God wants us to struggle and wonder because it forces us to seek Him wholeheartedly and to lean on Him and not our own understanding.

I am praying for you. I hope you find the encouragement and peace that you need. :dothug:

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