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Pregnant Again... 4 months after giving birth

Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy


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June 11th, 2009, 06:33 PM
Joliemommy's Avatar Waiting2TTCJesus is Lord
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: MidWest
Posts: 157
Originally Posted by OatmealKisses View Post
I was a only child. I don't know how much that makes me qualified to give my opinion, but here it goes.

I had always wished for a sibling (or 3) growing up. In particular a older brother. My mom only wanted one kid. I HATED being a only child!! I don't know if you only want one or just want another awhile later, but I can tell you that sometimes having all of your parents attention/love to yourself is not always a good thing. I longed for another sibling to come along to take some focus and attention off me. It was too much! I was lonely, isolated and alone in my childhood play. Siblings keep each other busy; fighting, playing, sharing secrets, building forts in the backyard out of sticks, pulling each other's hair. Parents tend to smother an only child with attention and love, to crippling level.

I know not all only children's lives are like that, but many I've talked to are.
This is incredible insight, I hope u take it to consideration considering u ( no one really) is promised another child. At least u are well on ur way to 2 now. What if u dont keep this one and then ur not able to have another child...

hugs and GL
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June 29th, 2009, 02:00 AM
JennLynn_'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Pickering, Ontario, Canada
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just wondering how you're doing...

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July 1st, 2009, 07:08 AM
Erinmarie83's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 2,289
I have to say that I was pretty appalled when I read this as I cannot understand why anyone could possibly have an abortion AFTER having a baby. It just doesnt make sense. My second pregnancy was not planned, our children will be 15 months apart.

I hate to be harsh, but I really hope that you decide to keep the baby because the children being close together simply is NOT a valid reason to have an abortion. Its incredibly selfish IMO.

Thanks to HeatherW for my gorgeous siggy

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July 7th, 2009, 06:25 PM
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 1
i am currently in this situation. my daughters birthday is march 20th and i just found out my due date for my next child is the same date an exact year later i need help tryin to find out what to do as well
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July 8th, 2009, 02:21 PM
JennLynn_'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Pickering, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 3,208
Just because someone chooses to have an abortion, it does not make them selfish. There are various reasons one may choose to do this. It's a very difficult decision to make, and it is one that weighs heavily on you for the rest of your life.

We are here to support one another, not to criticize, not to throw guilt on the fire. Regardless of your position on such a controversial subject, please remember that we all come here for support, not to be criticized.

Originally Posted by AlexiasMommy View Post
i am currently in this situation. my daughters birthday is march 20th and i just found out my due date for my next child is the same date an exact year later i need help tryin to find out what to do as well

My daughter was born March 19th. I can only imagine the conflicting emotions that you must be dealing with. I would love to have another baby.. but not for perhaps another 5 years. If I were to become pregnant again... I think I would be quite torn as well... in the end, I honestly think I would go through with keeping the baby. Look into your daughter's eyes and do what you feel is right for the both of you. No one else. your choice is your own. I am here for you if you need anyone.

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July 11th, 2009, 02:21 AM
JennLynn_'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Pickering, Ontario, Canada
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That's fine that it's your feelings, but it's also her feelings. Im just weighing in on her side, which it seems that so few people have so far in this thread. I sympathize and I understand the conflicting feelings going on. If I were in her position, I would feel very hurt by people calling me selfish. Of course people need and want to express their feelings and opinions. But calling someone "selfish"... no. Regardless of your beliefs, don't call someone selfish. You have no idea what they're going through.

I never said I agreed or disagreed with anyone in here. Express your feelings... but be tactful... remember the emotions that ran rampant in your mind when you found out that YOU had an unplanned pregnancy... mix that with pregnancy hormones...

Just be nice... I guess that's all i'm saying. If it were me... I just would've been really hurt.

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July 12th, 2009, 04:54 AM
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 87
I have to agree with JennLynn. We come here for advice when there is no else to talk to and possibly to return the favor by reaching out and helping someone else. Not to make someone else fell hurt or guilty. Calling someone selfish on here is uncalled for.

I'm in a similar situation. I just found out not even a week ago I'm pregnant again. When this child is born they will be only 18 months apart. I'll admit I considered an abortion because of our family financial situation. Currently neither of us is working and I'm returning to college in the fall.

But I have decided to keep the baby. I know in my heart that we will make it one way or the other. i.e. my husband will find a job even if it is only temporary or part time and I will continue my schooling. I also think of the close bond my son and his younger brother or sister will have and it my belief that this will be in a way a great gift to him. My only sister is 17 years older than me so I grew up basically as an only child. Her son (my nephew) is only 3 years younger than me so he was kind of like a little brother to me. We are still good friends, he is 16 and I'm 19.

Abortion is a very touchy subject. I think each situation is very different. It is ultimately the lady's decision that posted this thread. Her situation is different than mine or anyone else's. I hope she makes the decision that is right for her and her family.

Make a pregnancy ticker

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August 2nd, 2009, 01:15 PM
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Florida
Posts: 18
I gave birth last october and i am pregnant again. She is 9 months and i am 5 months pregnant. We are definetly not sad with our decision. It will be a challenge, since they are so close in age, but we'll manage.

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August 4th, 2009, 11:41 AM
SoonToBe3's Avatar Making room for #3!
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: CA
Posts: 253
My husband and I wanted to aswell. We spent 6 years trying for my son. I was on fertility meds when I got pregnant with him. He was born November 16th, 2007. January 2008, I found out I was pregnant again and my kids would be only 10.5 months apart. My daughter was born a week late. I wouldnt have it any other way. They're so close already and definitely keep each other company. My daughter went from doing nothing to crawling, to walking around furniture all within 2 weeks which I think was by watching my son do everything. He teaches her everything...which can be a bad thing I guess. lol It'll work out girl. My husband is pretty useless in the fathering area, hed rather do his own thing. So, if I can raise mine pretty much alone, so close in age, you can too! Miracles happen everyday, you have one.
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August 17th, 2009, 06:47 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Scotland, UK
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Just lurking!

When my second daughter was 12 weeks old i discovered i was pg again, my litle boy was born 15 days before her 1st birthday! He is now 6 weeks and sure i'm tired but i wouldn't change it for the world!! I also have an 8 year old so my attention is constantly divided but none of my kids suffer for it, my 1 year old loves her baby brother to bits, is always kissing him etc! It can be done, you have a suportive husband!

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September 19th, 2009, 09:24 AM
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 45
Hey, I completely disagree with anyone being so rude as to say you're selfish to consider an abortion, especially since the reason you're considering it is your other child! People should just shut up if they can't be civil; it's no excuse that it's on the Internet because we're still real life people with feelings interacting here. But as someone who had an abortion when I didn't really want one, I would just advise you to be really, really positive that's what you absolutely want or you will feel terrible about it. I still regret mine and think about that baby and it was 13 years ago. And if you have an abortion for someone else's sake you may even come to resent that person.
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October 9th, 2009, 08:51 PM
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Florida
Posts: 10
It can be done...I have brother that are exactly 10months apart.
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October 11th, 2009, 04:31 PM
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 5
An unplanned pregnancy no matter what the circumstances present a whole slew of conflicting emotions and upheaval. Only you can determine what is right for your situation and your family.

I can definitely understand your concerns. But I do believe that things work out the way they are meant to in the end. Love isn't divisible - two children wouldn't mean dividing the great love you have for your firstborn in half.

As a woman unable to have children of her own I feel the need to ask if you could ever consider making an adoption plan for this child.
It, too, is a tough choice but also a viable option.

Hundreds of couples are out there, just like my husband and I, praying and hoping for the right expectant mom to come into their lives and choose them to parent her child.

And that's what we do every single day....pray, hope and dream that one day a woman and her family will come forward and say "we choose you to parent our child".

If that is something you would ever consider, I would be humbled to have even the smallest opportunity to talk more with you about it. I can be reached at crystal(at)ourfamilyadoption(dot)net

No matter what you decide, know in your heart with confidence that it is the right decision for your situation.
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November 1st, 2009, 06:31 PM
proud-lilmomma's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: lock haven
Posts: 1,074
hey im a lurker i dont have this experience my self mine ar 2 years and 2 month apart but my sil has 2 and hers are 10months apart and yeah iit hard i see her dealing with it everyday but that cause her baby daddy does nothin and you seem to have a wonderfull suportive husband and im sure you would be able to do it and your daughter will enjoy it my nieces are so close its unreal they do everything together im pro-lif e but dear it ur choice and only u will be able to make it good luck and hope u do wat u feel is the best choice

thanks Katarina for my wonderful siggie
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