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i think i am going insane!! (also in june ddc)

Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy


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March 2nd, 2006, 12:52 PM
Lisadear's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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awww there are those times when we can just do by ourselves and be rid of family it seems huh?

Try and calm down a bit ... constant worrying isn't going to do you nor your baby any good. I know this was a whole unplanned thing but hey! it happens and it's not the end of the world.

I too was unwed when I got pregnant with my daughter and believe it or not I waited five months going into six before telling anyone and only did cause I was starting to show a lot.

You've already seemed to have thought long and hard about the pros and cons of having your baby and that's just fine.

Bear in mind that no matter what you say, your famiily will insist and they will tell you their views (and trust me some of it will be just so highly negative and ridiculous it will drive you bonkers) ... however, they will only drive you bonkers if you let them.
I'm telling you this from experience lol and of course it might be different for you and others, but they won't shut up lol

You can choose to either take them on and let them continue to down you and get you down ... or ... you can make up your mind to enjoy your pregnancy even though it wasn't planned.

Do what you need to do in order for you and your baby to be healthy and happy at this time.

My daughter will be 13 next week and I have no regrets at all ... I hope that you allow yourself to relax and enjoy your pregnancy and the baby when he is born.

Don't you dare let anyone try to convince you that any way you raise him he will be miserable ... that is such utter nonsense! ... you give him all the mother's love in the world and you will be just fine.

Thinking of you.

xxx Lisa xxx
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March 2nd, 2006, 01:11 PM
Mega Super Mommy
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Why does everyone's family always think that they have a say so on what goes on and what doesn't go on with the baby?? First off, you should let your mom know that this is the 21st century, and that it is NOT uncommon for a young girl to be unmarried and have a child. I know several people who are not trashy that have gotten pregnant from a guy they barely knew, and raised the baby, and are doing fine. I just don't understand why our families get so crazy about these things!! Anyways, just know that you are not alone out there! I'm also 20 years old and pregnant with my first child, and I honestly don't feel that my life is "ruined" or "over" just because I have to be more mature then some of my peers. It doesn't hurt to have kids young, b/c when everyone else is 55 and their kids are just getting out of high school, our's will already be out of college and have a career.
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March 2nd, 2006, 01:51 PM
Lisadear's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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lol girl! if your mom is anything like mine ... its all about control lol and when they can't control us they just get all mean lol

I'm bipolar and I see the same traits in my mom but would she ever think of going to the doctor or my pdoc to be evaluated? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO .... to her she's perfect and nothing's wrong with her and I'm the crazy bipolar nut LOL

whatever you do ... protect your sanity and let words go into one ear and out the next lol

xxx Lisa xxx
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March 2nd, 2006, 05:03 PM
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Yup you definately have WAY more patience than I do...lol Good for you! I'm the kind of person that really gets defensive when ppl start telling me that I haven't thought things through or that I'm wrong in feeling a certain way...Kudos to you for actually agreeing to lunch and just going along with her asking you to dress up...I would have either said no to lunch if she was just going to be negative about things, or at least dressed up as teenagerish as possible just to piss her off...haha! But then again, I can be evil somedays!

Try not to worry too much about what you family has to say. For now, they're going to try their hardest to get you to see things their way about how this pregnancy is bad and whatever...But just you wait! When that baby comes and once they've had a chance to get close to the baby a few times, they'll be telling you how glad they are that you kept the baby. They won't be able to imagine life without him. And if I'm wrong, and if they don't feel that way, I'd keep him away from them because he'll be able to sense that they feel negative about him...but honestly, who could feel negative when they're looking into a baby's face and can smell that beautiful new baby smell??? Things will work out.

Oh hey, have you thought of names yet for your little man?
Visit my blog here.
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March 2nd, 2006, 05:41 PM
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My mom was saying the SAME things to me, that I hadn't thought things through, yada yada yada.

Well now she's saying she can't believe how much I've grown up and that I'm actually ready to have a child, and that I'm going to be a great mommy.

Give it time, hopefully she'll turn around. My mom did, and let me tell ya, that surprised the heck out of me!
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