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Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy


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March 4th, 2006, 05:40 PM
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Okay so here it goes. My mother in law and brother in law make me so mad! When I found out I was pregnant, my mother in law actually asked my husband if it was his. I was so hurt by that and I even cried over it. Now she is trying to act all fake because my son is here and she wants to spend time with him. My husband did stick up for me when this happened and still does. However, its only gotten worse. My brother in law told my DH that the baby was an abomination and he should not have stayed with me. Then he had the audacity to tell my DH that he should get a divorce for his mom's Christmas present. Well needless to say, that led to a huge fight between the two of them. Things have been calm until recently. His mom is back to butting in and telling him to make up with his brother regardless of my feelings or what was said. She even has my DH's grandfather involved. The whole family acts like they should come first. I feel like yelling "Hello, I'm his wife and that's OUR son!" I am so angry. They say that his brother should be allowed to have his own opinion. I'm sorry but I can't forgive that. I look at my son and he is the most beautiful thing in the world. I love him so much! I can't even imagine the world without him. I just wish his family could understand how I feel. My husband tells me to ignore it because he'll handle it, but its really hard. Sorry I know this is long and boring, but its really been getting to me. I needed to let it all out.
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March 4th, 2006, 08:06 PM
Mom2DyJessAva's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: chicopee ma
Posts: 15,513
it seems to me that alot of people dont like seeing other people happy..you have a beautiful son and you two are happily married and they should accept that fact and get over it!...there was no need for them to say what they have said and should be really excited for u to..i no its really hard to ignore it but try not to let it get to u too much and when u start remembering about it just think about your husband and your son and all the good times that have happened and are going to happen..i no its not really that great of advice but i hope things get better for u! and by the way u could vent all you want even if its as long as a book..your always welcome and we're always here to try to give advice!

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March 4th, 2006, 09:45 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: San Angelo, Texas
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Hey Girl. I can relate to the same thing happening, except it was my fiance's friends, not his family. Well my fiance has it stuck in his head that I had gotten pregnant on purpose (knowing I was on b/c) and told his friends this. Two friends whom I've considered to be mutual friends until now. Well the first one was drunk when my fiance told him and was like "Man, just f***ing leave her. Or "make her" get an abortion." Well I was pretty pissed about that. Well then he tells his other friend the same thing and he says "Oh leave that f***ing b****." And what makes it worse is that my fiance LAUGHED when his friend said that. (Believe me we've had several fights over this issue) So I finally told him "I'm not going to raise a child with you around saying everyday how it "ruined" your life. I'm not afraid to f***ing leave you." Well that pretty much shut him up and he apologized and has been great ever since.
About the family situation (I'm supposed to be giving you advice not telling you a story! Lol) I would just let them know that if they have that strong of negative feelings about you and your son then maybe it's best that they not be a part of either of your lives. My fiance's grandma disregards his existence, but worships his sister. She just had a baby 5 months ago and I already told his grandma that if she treated our child any different or made it seem not as important or loved then I wouldn't let her see it. Of course I'm a bit of a witch, so you might handle the situation different. But that's my advice! Hope it gets better for you and Aiden!!
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March 6th, 2006, 11:23 AM
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 36
Why would they think that? Why would they SAY that? Even if they hated you, why would they not keep their mouth shut? You have a child, you're married now and what do their words help? They don't have to like you to offer your husband that they love support, you know?
Sometimes families drive me insane!
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March 6th, 2006, 04:18 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Winnipeg
Posts: 13,011
I can't even begin to explain how much I can totally relate on being pissed with family! URGH!!!
Personally, I just wouldn't let the ppl who say such negative things about you or the baby be near the both of you. They wanna talk trash, then fine! Then they get to miss out on getting to know their grandson/nephew...I know it sounds horrible and really vindictive, but you know what? With that kind of attitude, they'll no doubt end up hurting little Aiden later in life when he's old enough to understand the situation. And that sucks! So if I were you, I'd protect my son from them until they learn to shut their stupid mouths and get over whatever jealousy or bad feelings they have about you or the baby.
On the upside, what a wonderful man you've got there! Someone who's willing to stand up for you and the baby when someone's out of line...I could only wish for someone like that! My man is too loyal to his family to stand up for me when they piss me off. Oh well....
Anytime you start to feel bad about the situation, just look down at your beautiful baby and that will make you feel better (at least until you have to change his poopy diaper!! lol jk)
Visit my blog here.
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March 7th, 2006, 06:45 AM
Cyndee's Avatar Mommy to 3 tagalongs
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Texas
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Ok let me tell you this speaking with 9 years of experience with this stuff.. Your inlaws sound almost as bad as mine.. They have almost caused us to split on more than on occasion... Hold your head high and take it all with a grain of salt... Your hubby is with you... He loves you.. If he didn't he would listen to them and take their side.. The reason they do this is because he is on your side and they do not like it.... All in all they like getting your goat... I could tell you real horror stories about my inlaws, but I found that just plain out right not letting them get me.. Is the best revenge.... As long as my hubby stands by me that is all I need... Just be there for your hubby.. You don't have to please them...
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