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im so scared

Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy


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April 6th, 2006, 07:00 PM
Telucero's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Denver, Colorado
Posts: 409
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I am so right there with you. I completely understand. I am in the exact same position as you are. Collector notices in the mail, past due accounts, and one credit card. Most of the time I am in denial about it all. I am not sure if you have followed any of my posts but I left the father so I am doing this solo. The father has only once offered to buy a pack of diapers, and that was only because he knew my mother was right there listening to the conversation. At this point though, I cant think just about the financials. I know that I don't make a lot of money, but I know my son will need more than that. But, honestly, I am starting to feel terrified. I have my own one bedroom condo and no crib or bassinet. I have these moments when reality hits and I think, "My God, I don't have any money to support this child, what in the h*ll am I doing?" Then I start having these thoughts of how I just need to give me baby up for adoption. Then I realize, that I am a strong person, and I can do this. I'm just scare sh*tless about it all. The only thing I know to do is to go back to school in January in order to better provide for my son. I used to work for a university, so I know all about the student loan process and the options for single mothers going to school full time, it's tough, but I need to do it for my son. He'll be depending on me, I'm not going to let him down.

I can't tell you to not to be scared. I am terrified. But, I do know I have my son depending on me, so I HAVE to make it work.
Please PM me at time, I'd love to chat anytime.
Tamara and AJ
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April 6th, 2006, 07:55 PM
Mom2DyJessAva's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: chicopee ma
Posts: 15,513
i still have that concern considering i dont work!!! the clothes i have gotten for my little one was with the money i got from my taxes and everything else is coming from family..cribset,bedset, stroller,playpen etc everything is from them...my boyfriend works but i would still rather work and make some money rather then asking him for it...i dont wanna seem money hungry!

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April 6th, 2006, 08:23 PM
Star's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 2,722
My boyfriend and I are definately living on a budget, but we're started to work out ways to get around it. Our utilities are on the budge program, which means we pay the same amount every month, no matter how much we use (the amounts will adjust if we use way more, or way less electricity, gas etc.) So this way, each month we know exactly how much to put aside.

We dropped my bf's phone plan, and I made a "family plan" with mine, that saved $70 per month. We dropped the house line too.

We've also been downsizing a bit too. I'm selling my computer, because we really don't need two desk tops and a lap top when there is only two of us living here.

We pay for as much in cash is possible, if you need a credit card to pay for it, you probably don't need it.

And finally, I work one night per week at a department store. I don't earn a whole lot doing it, but the discount helps when we have to buy new clothes or presents for people.

Oh, and one of my friends (who just had a baby) said if you register on websites such as pampers, and different formulas, they'll send free samples and coupons. It doesn't sound like a whole lot, but every little thing helps!

Thanks to mtdk454 for the beautiful siggie!!

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April 7th, 2006, 05:49 AM
*Cassie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Fredericton, New Brunswick, Canada
Posts: 18,780
I hear you! I have everything I need, but I am worried about money. I'm in a bunch of debt right now and I'm not eligible for financial assistance until after the baby's born. So it's more right now that I'm worried for... I'm in college and not working. I don't know how I'm going to pay off any of my debt... I can't borrow money from anywhere cause I have no income. It is stressful. But I know everything will work out, no matter how bleak it seems now. I just think about holding my little miracle in my arms in September!
RIP Grammie (06/24/35 - 07/25/06) and Grampie (08/18/26 - 07/26/06). I love you both and I miss you so much...
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April 7th, 2006, 10:26 AM
12yrslater's Avatar Regular
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 5
i am so worried that i am not going to be able to provide for my son. i am due june 14 and have all the big things i need (the crib, stroller, changing table, carseat, etc.) but NO money in savings. i am already in debt with different credit card agencies (and in collections with a few other places) i work for nine to ten bucks an hour and just dont know how well that is gonna cut it. i know that i have enough money for me but is it gonna be enough for me and my son once he comes? am i the only one feeling like this? what are your concerns?[/b]
Hi. My name is Pati and I am EXTREMELY new to the "JUST MOMMIES" site. I posted a hello in the "Signing to Baby" Forum. I was lurking and came accross your thread. I just want to tell you that everything will work out for the best! I swear. I had my first child (he is now 13) at the age of 18 and I was mortified of the thought of not being able to provide for him. Things worked out wonderfully for us!

May I make a few suggestions? I don't know where you are located but if you are in the US you can definitely apply for government assistance. Get the medical card (especially important). This way, you can definitely take that baby to the regular physicals/immunizations. Aside from that, one sure way to save is by breastfeeding. I didn't do it with my first (which I regret) but I am doing it with my 7 month old and I now realize how much money we could have saved by simple breastfeeding (also all the benefits of BM). If you are solely against breastfeeding, try WIC. They will provide formula for the baby and even food for you.

Ok, now about your cc's. I am not sure your age (did I miss it?). If you are overwhelmed honey, file for bankruptcy. No point in starving you and your baby to pay off credit card debts. Why not start off on a clean slate? I know it will take time to clear that off your report but are you really that worried about your credit or would you rather feed your child? KWIM?

Had I known all this when I was going to have my first I would have not suffered which is why I try to pass whatever I have learned along to others!

I wish you and your future baby the very best!!!!
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