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Young, and unplanned... need help telling my mother

Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy


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  • 2 Post By mrsjl
  • 1 Post By Leogirl
  • 1 Post By EverydayJoy

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August 15th, 2012, 09:43 PM
anjawb's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Western Mass
Posts: 979
I am 24, and my boyfriend and I have been together for 4 and a half months. We have an amazing relationship, and knew from the beginning that we were going to get married (he bought me a ring in month 2) but we weren't going to rush the wedding. Kids were part of the five year plan, but definitely not now. We are really excited, however, and if we were on a private island, everything would be great!

Im not so young that it should be an issue, but I have a rocky relationship with my mother. We are best friends and worst enemies depending on the day, and she does not approve of the man I have decided to spend my life with. I found out last week that I am pregnant, (now 6 weeks!), and have no idea how to tell her! I know she's going to be extremely angry, and feel like I'm throwing my life away, and I'm actually really scared to tell her!

any suggestions?
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August 16th, 2012, 09:57 AM
mrsjl's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Halifax, Nova Scotia
Posts: 4,917
be excited and happy about it when you tell her. if she is upset, tell her that it wasn't planned but there's no going back now and everyone will just have to make the best of it. you're an adult, this is YOUR child, not hers. don't let her get to you.

or if you know for certain that it isn't going to go over well you could always shoot her an email that says "we are very excited to announce that we are expecting! when you are ready to be excited with us, give us a call" LOL
MIL2lissy8 and anjawb like this.
mom to
Rebecca (11/22/07) Nathan (7/31/10) & Thomas (5/3/13)
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August 16th, 2012, 10:52 AM
Leogirl's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 3,163
Just be super upbeat and happy when you tell her. Maybe meet her out to dinner so you're in a public place so maybe she won't make a specticle of herself. Plus it gives you the option of easily leaving if things get too heated or out of hand.
MIL2lissy8 likes this.

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August 16th, 2012, 01:42 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2009
Location: southern cali
Posts: 3,549
good luck, however you tell her.
what goes around, comes around.....
speak with kindness....

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August 16th, 2012, 04:58 PM
EverydayJoy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Pacific NW
Posts: 6,913
Put yourself and your family (bf & baby) first in this case, your mother doesn't have to accept it for it to work out. If you are excited for this baby, that's awesome! New life is a blessing and should be cherished. Don't let Mom rain on your parade! I like the email idea..."When you're ready to be excited with us, give us a call!" Hehe. You are definitely an adult and don't need Mom's approval anymore. You are your own woman!
Another thought, there is no harm in waiting to tell her as well...especially since you are so early in the pregnancy. Some women wait till after their first trimester is over before they tell, so there's nothing wrong with waiting. Just enjoy the glow of knowing there's a little life inside of you...plenty of time to sort out your mom
abur likes this.

Little Bud: Blooming in Heaven 1.24.12
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August 17th, 2012, 06:14 AM
anjawb's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Western Mass
Posts: 979
Thanks everyone! Ive actually been thinking about an email, but didnt want it to sound like a "i dont want to talk to you" email, so I like the "when your ready to be excited" idea!

Ill let you all know how it goes when i do tell her!

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August 19th, 2012, 06:10 PM
Lyndsey2013's Avatar expecting in June 2018
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 646
I waited to tell my mother until week 12 because I got pregnant in a fairly new relationship (about 4 months into it). She didn't really know him but was supportive nonetheless. She was not upset at all that I waited to tell her. Our relationship is okay to good, so I was happy her response was positive. Good luck to you.
Juliana Rose, 1/7/13
Gabriel Tomás, 4/29/14
***ectopic rupture*** 6/2/16
expecting live baby #3! DUE 6/2/18

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