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New here--unplanned pregnancy and very nervous

Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy


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  • 1 Post By DeletedUser12345
  • 1 Post By mamatomany
  • 1 Post By Kim3

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February 18th, 2013, 06:13 PM
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 11
Hi, I'm 33 and it's my first time being pregnant. I got pregnant by a guy who's just my friend--we were just fooling around and my BCP failed. He freaked out and is pushing hard for me to get an abortion, but I just feel that it is not a good decision for me. I'm scared to have the baby (and tell my very conservative family), but I really don't feel that abortion is the right thing to do (but I do NOT judge others). I am financially stable, have a great job and can do this on my own, but am just very scared and wish that the baby (it's a boy) would have a father in his life. The baby's father is not a bad person, he's just scared and wants to only have a child in a marriage, and not in this situation. What do you all think I should do? I really need to decide soon and am just so scared.
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February 18th, 2013, 08:05 PM
DeletedUser12345's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Seattle
Posts: 2,668
Well, I thought my family was going to be upset. I am 24 and not in a decent position to do this. I am having a boy and my parents are actually excited. It was a one time thing with a guy who I realized after was a VERY bad person and things happened before I knew I was pregnant and I can not ever contact him again as hes that bad of a person.. Sooooo, that being said.. Im in it alone and very scared. I did not want to be pregnant right now but I am excited now that Ive had 3D ultrasounds and seen the baby waving and being pretty amazing. I always knew if this happened I could not do an abortion.. but like you wont be mean or judgemental to those who chose it is best for them.. I just couldnt after seeing the heart beating away at 7 weeks. I think if you want to do it, do it.. and as for your conservative family, they might need some credit.. They will love the baby and probably be happy you had it and went the hard way than aborting it.. I know my mom would have been heartbroken if she ever knew I had an abortion. I hope you have the support you need and can do what you really want to do.
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February 21st, 2013, 10:01 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 848
I'm sure others will echo this, but if you have ANY doubts you should not even consider abortion as it's not something you can change your mind about and it can leave you with a lifetime of regret, guilt, and longing.

You want to mother this little guy, are in a good position to do so financially, and that's plenty to start! Please don't let a guy who's not willing to take responsibility pressure you into ending your son's life.

Aso, like Melissa said above, your family will most likely just fall in love with this baby after the initial shock. Give them a chance .

Best wishes and congrats on your baby. Boys are so much fun .
MIL2lissy8 likes this.
Brooke, happy mama to one girl (9), and four boys (7, 5, 3, and 2) and a surprise post-vasectomy miracle baby born February 7.
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February 23rd, 2013, 07:15 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 2,153
Perhaps having another ultrasound would help you to decide. Every time I see my daughter on an ultrasound I feel connected. The decision is yours. I will say though once your child starts kicking you feel so connected.
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February 24th, 2013, 02:19 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2009
Location: southern cali
Posts: 3,549
I would like to encourage you to keep going ahead. if you already know its a boy, you are too far to be even considering an abortion (in my min; well in my mind I would not ever consider it and yes I have been in that position to do it twice). just move forward and don't look back. you can do this!!!
what goes around, comes around.....
speak with kindness....

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