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17 and pregnant probs

Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy


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  • 1 Post By jes81878

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July 26th, 2013, 08:44 AM
ducksaresnazzy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: new york
Posts: 2,479
so, i'm 17 years old and pregnant. i have no one who i can talk to about this- my boyfriend is very supportive in his own way but he's more just more excited than i am, while i'm trying to be realistic. we still live at home with my parents, who are having marital problems that are causing a strain on my own relationship. he wants to leave so that our family can be independent, and while i think we're both mature enough to take this on, i honestly don't want to move yet. my parents' house is walking distance to both of our jobs and our car isn't drivable right now (long story, but the brake line's completely shot). moving out right now is completely irresponsible. at work, we both just got promotions that came with more responsibility and more on-call hours for which we need to be close by and reliable.

i feel so stressed about this whole situation. to top it off, one of my best friends (i only have two) is moving away from me to go to college to better herself and i feel left behind. i'm happy for her accomplishments, don't get me wrong, but i'm going to miss her terribly. my other best friend (she's 18) thinks that having a baby is a splendid idea, and whenever i try to tell her how hard this is on Nate, myself, and my parents, she says if i can do it, she can. i know i can't stop her from making the mistake i did but it's almost insulting that she isn't listening to me when i'm trying to vent- she's looking at me as a how-to-do-teen-pregnancy guide.

the worst part, though, is knowing i disappointed everyone. i graduated high school at 16 and am now half done with a two-year degree. i feel like this pregnancy is a slap in the face to everyone who was proud of me, and i know that they now think i'm going nowhere in life. a lot of girls in my small town are pregnant are my age and their baby daddies left them high and dry, so i know i should be grateful for the support Nate's been giving me and how accepting our families both are on the surface, but i can tell they don't have very high expectations for us anymore. he comes from a line of literal geniuses and i know his father had big plans for his future, and even though he's excited about being a grandfather again, i'm afraid he's also disappointed in us.

i'm not even sure what i'm looking for by posting this (i'm honestly not sure how forums work anyway) and i know it's very ramble-y, but i just needed to get that off my chest.
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July 26th, 2013, 09:49 AM
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 14
Wow, that sounds like it's a stressful situation. Your take, however, is very mature. It's so hard feeling like you're letting everyone down ( I was 18 and unmarried coming from a very devout Christian family when I got pregnant), but obviously you're doing what you think is best for you and your baby. That doesn't make it easy, and I admire you for how you're handling your situation.
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July 29th, 2013, 07:29 PM
jes81878's Avatar Jennifer
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Burlington, KY
Posts: 613
It seems you have a lot of help and support from both families, and there is no reason for you or your boyfriend not to finish your goals. My friend got pregnant while in her 1st year of college, but she finished and is now a pediatrician. It will be harder, but you have great support around you. It may not seem like it now, but things will work out, and your life will be good.
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Jennifer 34 (tubal factor and lost my left tube from ectopic)
Andres 34 (perfect SA)
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My Son 13
Husband no bio/children (but the best father ever to my two boys)
TTC for 4 years
IVF in June 2013 (BFP)
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July 30th, 2013, 02:03 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Cincinnati, OH
Posts: 1,834
The thing to keep in mind is that you're not "ruining" your goals but you may end up delaying them. Instead of 1 more year of college you may have 1 year and some summer courses.

Speak to your professors, maybe they can accelerate some of your courses so that you can finish the class before your due date.

And no one is going to be disappointed in someone who is stepping up and taking responsibility Congrats and good luck!

'Scuse the bad typing, please. 'Breast is Best' but not when browsing the internet!

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