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Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy


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August 11th, 2005, 08:19 AM
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 1
Hi everyone, I did a google search looking for advice on how to break the news to friends and family and stumbled upon this site. Everyone seems so nice here, and I thought it would be good to join and post since I haven't told anyone the news of my pregnancy. Wow, I could write a novella but I'll spare anyone who should come across this post. Here's the long and short of my story. I took a home pregnancy test after my period was 11 days late, and I noticed a blazing positive after about 45 seconds. This is very unexpected, and I don't feel ready, but I feel a greater power is the one that ultimately decides when one is ready. I may not understand why this has happened (although I'm very clear on how!) but I accept this and am trying to adjust the best I can. I don't think I'm equipped to handle an abortion, and besides, I've always wanted to be a mother someday. My 28th birthday is in 4 days, so this seems like a gift. Anyway, according to my last period, I am about 7 wks along. I have been with my boyfriend for three months (I'll call him S). I met him over 11 months ago at work, which is his off- season job. I felt so incredibly drawn to him the moment I first laid eyes on him. When we met however we both had been in unhealthy relationships for four years (I was engaged, but my ex- fiance had not helped with any plans, therefore nothing was planned for any kind of wedding). Both of us felt we couldn't take it anymore and had been very unhappy long before we met. We helped eachother get through the transistion of ending long-term realtionships, which came about just weeks apart. After all the dust settled, we both realized how happy we were just to be in eachother's company, how well we communicated, shared in the same principles, spiritual beliefs, and goals, and enjoyed the same kind of activities. We realized that our feelings had outgrown just being good friends, and were convinced that we crossed paths for a reason, clearly, fate put us together. So, S knows about the pregnancy, he was there for the second test, and he's been so sweet. We've actually talked about getting married someday, even before all this came about.

I had a miscarriage 6 yrs ago, and that was the most difficult situation that I've ever had to overcome. The whole situation was just bad. I miscarried at about 7 weeks, and had hardly any symptoms other than feeling tired and one episode of indigestion. The embryo never even formed, but my uterus functioned like I was pregnant. I really don't want to go through that again, and I 'm convinced that since I had been taking the pill when I got pregnant back then and apparantly took it even after conception, that must have factored into the miscarriage somehow. By the way, don't have sex at all if you're switching brands of birth control! Anyway, my dr. assured me then that I could go on to have normal pregnancies someday. I hope that's the case. I'm really nervous about telling people. After what had happened I felt I had another chance to live my childhood dream, which was to finish school, get married, and then plan to have a child. I fear that they will think I've been completely irresponsible, but I did learn a lesson from that terrible experience 6yrs ago! S and I tried to be very careful. Wow, I am very much in love with him, and I believe he loves me too, but I guess I am nervous in the back of my mind, although he's been totally trustworthy thus far, he will freak out and split. I 'm nervous about everything, from breaking the news, to a 25% chance of miscarriage, pushing S away because of my crazy mood swings (must be careful there, I felt like I had lost my mind before I took the test because I felt so irritable/frustrated one day about my job), and especially the thoughts of being emotionally, intellectually, and financially responsible for another human being for the rest of my life. Wow, I do need to talk to someone! Also, my job doesn't offer any kind of benefits, so I need to find some kind of health insurance very very soon. So much to take care of and think about...
So far as symptoms go: I've had constipation, my body temperature seems really high-- I'm always hot these day even in a.c., indigestion/slight nausea, headaches, sensitivity to scents, slight fatigue, sore breasts, it feels like someone is pushing and pulling my abdomen, mixed emotions, and I've also had some out of character mood swings. Poor S!! Did I mention I have to urinate all the time? Before I took the test I thought I was seriously retaining water or gaining weight. I know what's going on with that now. haha. I actually thought that since I was getting close to my 30's, my metabolism was just slowing down a little and all the chocolate goodies were just catching up with me. haha. Also, are there any other vegetarians out there who have been or are pregnant? I'm trying to eat lots of protein, and I'm taking vitamins. Anyway, that's my story. Feel free to lend any insight, I would really appreciate it.
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August 11th, 2005, 09:43 AM
momma06's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Missouri
Posts: 1,645
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Wow, that was a long introduction. Glad to have ya here though. Sorry about your miscarriage 6 years ago, but it doesn't mean that it will happen every single time you get pregnant so this baby could be perfectly healthy! Oh and having to pee every 5 mins does not go away what so ever. lol. You'll wake up in the middle of the night a couple of times thinkin you won't make it and turns out it's only a second pee and you'll get mad. Anyways, you could possibly get on medicaid if you're not making enough and if that's not the case is there insurance that you can go through with your company that will cover your pregnancy? Keep us updated!

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August 17th, 2005, 12:17 PM
~Cupcake~'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 14,294
Welcome to JM and good luck with your pregnancy. The boards have been down the last few days so that is the reason you have not had much response. It is great here and I am sure you will love it. Having never dealt with an unexpected pregnancy myself I am sorry that I don't have much advice for telling people. I think it sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders and sometimes higher powers intervene which may be the case here Just want to wish you all the best and invite you to stop by again. We also have due date clubs where you can chat with other women who will be due around the same time as you. Again, welcome

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